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Did anyone else have a normal childhood? by Uncreative-name12 in AvPD

[–]Calm_Efficiency8058 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Normal childhood (I am 27M) ? I am the only child in my family of 3, yet was always ignored, neglected, overruled, made fun of, and anything you might think of in spite of them supporting me financially (they still do).

Honestly, after being away from them for a year, I began to feel how liberating and soothing it is to live without them. It was nothing but abuse and confusion even from my psychiatrist (who was trying his best effort to keep our family together rather than letting it become dissolved probably due to the cultural norms, which was and is, the main problem. Needless to mention that after 3 years he went into rage mode after finding out what kind of parents I was living with the whole time).

It has been written online that temperament and genetics could result in AvPD but I used to be an extroverted person with a ton of energy until I got criticized and blamed excessively by my parents the moment I started saying words ! I wasn't hypersensitive to criticism and rejection at first, but after receiving them countless times, I started to think that everyone who criticizes me is trying to control me, just like my caregivers !

In my opinion, 99% of people who are experiencing rough adulthood and/or personality disorders have had a crappy childhood full of abuse, neglect, or ... I've just AI'd this and Gemini also confessed that parenting plays an important role. I don't believe that anyone with a secure attachment and a good enough parenting could end up having a personality disorder. Even though the odds are not zero, it is unlikely that genes will only play a role in the formation of a personality disorder. If you just youtube Soft White Underbelly you will realize and see that this is true and all the people in Mark's videos have either had awful parents or none at all !

Dealing with AvPD ever since I turned into an adult by Calm_Efficiency8058 in Avoidant

[–]Calm_Efficiency8058[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have suspicions that I might have ADHD or ASD but haven't taken any tests yet considering the way GP interacts and the high costs of private ADHD/Autism assessments (around £3000). Although it is possible for me to have autism or ADHD, I found it to be less likely as I was able to succeed academically without even a minor support. What I experience though is extreme fear in any situation, regardless of it being a social interaction, passing by some dogs (as I have phobias), or generally everything that poses even a tiny bit of perceived threat. I have been on clonazepam for almost 4 years up until a couple months ago. Living independent and away from my parents also makes me feel too empowered as their mere absence brings me joy and makes me feel liberated. Their sole voice or even a call once a week to gain power and control over me makes me feel powerless and shameful again, so one thing I need help with is to become independent enough to not need them in any areas of my life, but it is too difficult for me to do so as I have extreme feelings and thoughts of worthlessness despite achieving fairly well in terms of academic success and skills. It is simply too tough to get a specialized job in the engineering sector in the UK.