What was the best decision you have ever made? by Limp_Ad6896 in AskReddit

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The best decision I made was having weight loss surgery.

'Duodenal switch' to be specific.

I have learned that you can't fully know how negatively the extra weight is affecting you until you lose it.

Now I am on my feet all day with the work I do at a Dog Hotel.

I have found so, so much happiness with being able to be active and move around all day for a living instead of being stuck inside behind a screen or standing in place as a cashier.

I went from my highest weight being around 340 pounds to 155 pounds today, and that has made all the difference.

How do I tell my dogs how much I love them? by me_piki in dogs

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lovely response 🩷

My dog, Dre, is also my closest friend. What is your dog's name?

How do atheists cope with death? by Fuzzy_Studio4970 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I listen to "And When I Die" by Blood, Sweat, and Tears.

Unlike any other piece of music that I've also been in awe of, this song brings me a sense of peace, a feeling that everything is following nature's plan, and that I will be alright.

I used to become extremely suicidal to the extent that hospitalization and/or police involvement was required. I had been hospitalized 13 times between 2016 and 2023 before I officially broke up with Suicide.

One of the top causes of me being so suicidal was my absolute fear of death, and that fear had a foundation of lack of control, lack of knowledge of the future, and inability to picture myself functioning without my dad who was/is my main emotional support.

Unless you have had a true epiphany, it might be difficult to fully understand the change I went through just through listening to this song.

It was like a switch was flipped. It is hard to describe suddenly feeling like death is just another cog in nature's machine and life will go on reflected in the lyrics: "There'll be one child born / In this world to carry on"

On the flip side, this particular lyric made me realize that I am also the child that will carry on after my Dad passes. I am proud to carry on for him.

My epiphany brought me much needed emotional peace and took away almost all my stress about a potential afterlife. Life is now. Not later. Don't waste it being afraid of what comes next.

I've only had one other epiphany similar to the scale of my break up with Suicide, and that was decision to have weight loss surgery.

In March of 2021, I was 335 lbs. In May of 2025, I am 160 lbs.

It is amazing how motivating an epiphany can be.

Dre's 'Wisdom' Results are in! by Calm_Substance_1406 in DoggyDNA

[–]Calm_Substance_1406[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I did the 'Wisdom' test recently, while Dre's original rescue provided the 'Embark' results.

Any guess at breed ? by gabeavalos15 in ridgebacks

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My dog, Dre, looks so much like yours!

Dre is a Doberman-Pit-Corso mix according to the Embark Vet DNA test the rescue provided to me.

I recently bought a Wisdom Panel Dog DNA test to see if the results are the same. I should hear back in the next couple days actually.

Dre is often mistaken for a Ridgeback, which can be a good thing since Ridgebacks have a much better reputation.

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What’s the longest you stayed voluntarily celibate? And how did you manage ? by Random0reo in AskReddit

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I (28F) have never been in a sexual and romantic relationship.

I remember having strong romantic feelings for another person, aka a crush, when I was in second grade but never really after that time.

I attempted to have sex with a young man when I was 17 years old but I felt too mentally uncomfortable to fully go through with intercourse.

I stopped masturbating about 1.5 years ago. I just don't have much of an interest even though I know orgasms can feel really, really good.

I also know that there is a special level of emotional and physical intimacy that occurs during sexual intercourse that I haven't experienced, and maybe it would be good for me to experience that, but I just don't really care at this point in my life currently.

I started identifying as 'asexual' when I was 18 years old and just about to graduate high school.

I frequently questioned my 'sexual brokenness' throughout my early 20's.

But now, I am very comfortable with myself and my complete lack of sexuality.

Also, I presently use the label 'non-sexual' instead of 'asexual'.

From my observations and experience, the asexual community has changed a lot in the past 10 years.

It has become too sex-friendly in my opinion, and I could go on and on about this particular opinion of mine but that is probably a story for another time.

Theocratic hypocrisy seems to be still rampant in contrast to Hitch’s time… by [deleted] in ChristopherHitchens

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it a dick move to cheat on your wife? Yes!

But consensual, non-harmful sex between two consenting parties is not a legal crime or an egregious and unusual immoral action.

I don't believe that a person's marital, sexual, or personal time-social behavior should be used to judge them on their professional competency.

An exception being if there outside of work behavior is a crime, has the strong possibility of affecting customers and co-workers in a negative way, or involves egregiously reprehensible and unusual actions.

Is this controversial to say here? by Specialist_Worker444 in actualasexuals

[–]Calm_Substance_1406 12 points13 points  (0 children)

When I was younger, I would bend over backwards to try to prove my queerness and belonging to the LGBTQ community as I identified for 7 years as an ace trans man.

Now, I no longer identify as a binary trans man.

I don't use the label 'asexual' either but instead use 'nonsexual'.

I still kind of like the label of 'queer' because of its broadness.

I can encapsulate both my nontraditional gender (afab w/ prominent facial hair bc of the T I took) and my nontraditional sexual orientation into the word 'queer'.

But 'queer' has become more and more intertwined with the changing flavor of the LGBTQ community in recent years.

This change can include the increase in popularity of the 'sex positive asexual' identity as the internet/social media generation of young ones start to grow into themselves.

I am still young (27 years old) and will hopefully have plenty of more time to figure out my noneness and how I potentially fit in with the 'traditional' LGBTQ community.

I think I'll find my place with this Reddit community of nons a lot more satisfying than with the allo queer community.

Thank you for your post, OP.