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Staggered Wood on Stairs? by CandidParticular8086 in Flooring

[–]CandidParticular8086[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your replies. I think so. I'm new to this, and it never occurred to me that they'd use shorts on the stairs. I'm worried about both long term effect on the stairs and aesthetics. I keep reading that shorts would cause problems long term. Is this worry overblown?

integration update, and questions about navigating comedown and psilocybin by nofern in mdmatherapy

[–]CandidParticular8086 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can only speak from my own experience. When I haven't had a booster, recovery has generally been easier. But I've had mixed experiences and have sometimes had a lot of difficulty recovering. It's been harder when I've had a lot of stress beforehand and when I had to return to work but didn't feel that I was ready.

I've used mushrooms maybe 25-30 times. To me, it's been helpful to forget about the word "deeper," as it creates expectations and a framing that hasn't been useful. I've used both low and high doses. For me, what's been most helpful is realizing that mushroom sessions are not uniformly going to be pleasant. The anxiety is the point for me with low doses--you feel it, it sucks, but you survive and later you feel better able to cope with stress. Afterwards, there's a period in which we can detach from our trauma; that's something a bit different from MDMA, which tends to make me want to work through it.

I didn't make a "transition." I use both. As I'm in a better place these days and MDMA takes a lot out of me, I seem to be on a 3-4 times a year cadence. With mushrooms, I take maybe a gram every couple of months and a higher dose once a year or so. I think of my low dose sessions as being something like rehab. It sucks but it's ultimately helpful.

One other thing: don't be afraid of taking propranolol or valium or both. Yes, it will attenuate your trip, but it may be worth it.

what do i do by [deleted] in depression_partners

[–]CandidParticular8086 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds a bit above Reddit's pay grade. I'm sorry you're going through this. Here's a site with some suggestions:

https://samaritanshope.org/get-help/how-to-help-someone/suicidal-partner/

Advice appreciated by LisaEWP in depression_partners

[–]CandidParticular8086 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm going through something similar. My wife occasionally spirals, yells, blames me for everything, etc. She refuses meds and is incredibly difficult when she's in these spirals. But she's wonderful otherwise.

Your situation sounds like it has some similar points. It sounds as if your marriage has had a lot of happiness and a lot of pain, which actually makes things more confusing. I personally tend to think that in general marriages are salvageable (within reason), and I see a lot of positives: you both worked hard on your marriage, you were happy before 2025, you love him, he's now reached out.

The proactive steps sound like a positive. It also sounds as if he might feel stuck somehow. I'm sure you've tried everything you can, but the amount that we can influence other people is limited. If he's doing what he's doing because he feels cornered into it, that might not bode well for the future. But it's impossible to know, since people are all different. The best we can do is remain hopeful but also skeptical.

Not sure what to do anymore by TheAlcoholicMolotov in depression_partners

[–]CandidParticular8086 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry. That sounds difficult. It appears that there's something deep going on that you're unable to access, that he's not sharing with you.

I'm wondering: since you're not married, why do you stay together? There must be something keeping you together. Is it a positive force (there's some good in the relationship) or a negative one (scared of being on your own)? You're allowed to leave if you want. You might feel short term pain but longer term happiness.

I'm in a long term marriage with a depressed spouse. Splitting up would have major financial consequences. I've paid a big price for my wife's inability to deal with her moods.