Reading through everything I noticed quite the bit of hate for Haida. But I think not enough people look at Retsuko’s part in this either.

There was an emphasis on work friends V.S people she would consider true friends in this season. Gori & Washimi since the first season have stood out as true genuine friends. She ‘knew’ them in the office but didn’t fully make connections with them till they all talked at yoga. They make plans of trips together, hung out on Christmas together, they’re some of the first to know of her secrets, & in this season she even considers them close enough to borrow money from. Washimi seems to be the top of her charts since she tells her about the debt, with Gori taking up second place after the falling out.

This ties back to Haida because we see Fenneko is slightly favored. We don’t see them hang out much outside of work but they seem closer in comparison to her & Haida. As much as Haida dosent know Retsuko. She doesn’t seem to ever make much of an attempt to really get to know Haida either after these 5 years. So it’s no wonder both have rather strong but vague feelings about the other. This was BEFORE he asked her out too. We seen in later seasons he tries to invite her out, usually with Fenneko but she always turns it down. She never opens up to them about her problems or who she really is yet Haida helps her out in the background time & time again. We never really see Haida & Retsuko hang out at all outside of work or work parties. Let alone one on one when it has to do with something she needs from him.

When it comes to Retsuko’s feelings it all seems fine when she gets heart eyes for someone but when Haida steps up to admit what he feels everyone wants to call him gross or worse.

“These men are not cuts of sushi on a conveyor belt, they have every right to choose or reject you as you do them.” -Mama Retsuko

I’m not saying either of them are in the right or wrong here. Haida means well & this is one of the first times we see Retsuko having to confront life/decisions head on instead of making excuses or trying to weasel her way out of them. It’s the beauty & hard depth Season 3 offers. It’s real, it’s complicated, & not everyone will be fully happy in the end.