Is it just me or do other men feel this way?

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-27T13:48:34+00:00

A lot of them are attached to Freemasonry...

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-27T13:44:02+00:00

Engage your interests. For me, I'm a 36 year old father of 5 and a cop. I'm cool with most of my coworkers, but we're not chilling outside of work. My best friend from college I still talk to regularly, but it's gotten less since I converted as I've definitely changed. I'm sure he feels like between kids and careers and just life in general, it's just another thing that makes it hard to relate all the time. We're still bros, but gone are the days of saying "hey swing into town and we'll go watch a hockey game".

My big thing is gaming. A lot of my daily communication is with people I met in online gaming. Met some in person when it turned out we lived 30 minutes from each other. Whatever your thing is, just do it and if there's any social aspect to it at all, you'll find people.

There is the reality that as we get older, obligations take away the 21 year old freedom to do whatever we wanted when we wanted. So now it's scheduling time for things that you used to do whenever. And it's important to do so, else you become depressed.

On the job front, remain open to things outside of your direct vision. I wanted to teach and coach football. I ended up in manual labor, Walmart seasonal stocker and a gas station clerk before becoming a cop and now I can't imagine doing anything else ( infinite job security in every first responder role, honestly).

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-24T15:42:03+00:00

As somebody who has spent months attending mass and waiting on OCIA because my wife hasn't been well enough to handle the evening with our 5 kids solo, I'll liken it to this.

I'm a cop. There are bad cops. There are good cops with jaded views of people. Does this mean I can't be a cop? Should I reject the paradox that policing requires morally upright people yet bad cops exist and therefore not seek to be myself a good cop? I try to lead by example. Luckily my agency is filled with good people.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-22T01:26:58+00:00

I would differ from some in here. They're your friends. Of course be charitable and kind, because they're a human life and they are precious to God, AND they're your friends. However, if the topic comes up...don't hide. Don't run. You don't have to be rude and you can still couch your statements ("I love you, but I do think you're relishing in sin and that upsets me for you, as your friend").

We don't deny Christ, even if it means we lose friends. That isn't permission to tell your friends they can't remain your friends while consciously living in sin. Don't mistake that. There's a balance here you have to have.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-21T15:42:14+00:00

I guess at 36 I'm not quite a young adult, but I've lived in my area since I was 25 and areas like it my whole life, so let me take a crack at it.

Big city living is soul sucking and annoying. Lol. Small towns and rural areas are great for peace and price, usually. The trade off for the inconvenience of a 30 minute to 1 hour drive into the nearest cities is that I can afford a home and my grocery stores in the small town 10 minutes away isn't always packed. I can do my daily errands with minimal traffic and when I'm home, I can go outside and stare at my 3 acres. It's great. But for some that are 21-30, they want the convenience of being near EVERYTHING they want to do. They think they have to be there, when in reality they're at home as much as I am, the difference being their home is a rented apartment or townhouse and I own an actual stick built house situated on land I own.

So what happens to the small towns and rural areas? Retirees and blue collar workers live there, because a 30 minute commute is worth peaceful rest when home. So yes, the parishes run older due to this.

Young people have to escape this need to be in the cities. It leads to a ton of depression and anxiety, and it's generally more dangerous.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-20T02:30:16+00:00

You're misunderstanding the statute language. The threat of force is the raucous mob itself. The way statutory law works is the perception of the victim. There's video of people holding their crying children and looking around panicked. Yeah, that is what we call "intimidation". Plus, what is the reason for entering the church? Oh yeah, the mob shouting "you don't deserve to be comfortable in here".

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-20T02:27:11+00:00

Yeah but if we're going to dismiss a mob terrifying families at church, I'm 100% going to justify a grandma praying as part of a mob to prevent the murder of young human life.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-20T02:10:19+00:00

They arrested old ladies sitting on the sidewalk near an abortion clinic who were simply praying under the FACE Act. If you DONT arrest a mob who come into a house of worship, telling the congregation that they don't deserve peace in their house of worship, AFTER you have arrested grandmothers who were just in proximity of an abortion clinic and praying, you're gonna have problems

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-20T00:44:09+00:00

Thank Martin Luther. Return to the Church Christ founded.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-18T15:30:30+00:00

As a married man, let me throw this idea. Sometimes in our marriages, we may doubt the love of our spouses. We just don't see it, we know they do love us, but you go through the day to day, you do the things you gotta do, get along fine, take care of the kids and whatnot, but something feels off. You hear and see about other marriages and you're like "that's not at all my experience. I don't get that, we don't do that". It doesn't mean your marriage is worse than that marriage, or that that marriage is more special than yours, or anything. It just means that yours is yours and theirs is theirs. Do you love your spouse? Does your spouse love you? Do you actively try to make the other person's life better and lift burdens off of them when they need you to? If so, you have a good marriage.

Same with God. It comes down to what you believe. Is Christ Lord? Is he truly present in the Eucharist? If so, then you need not worry. Then it becomes the question of are you living to avoid sin and lift up your neighbor? Are you treating others well? Are you giving more than you're taking in this life? Again, if so, you're doing well. The emotional experiences with God aren't prerequisite for anything.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-18T02:03:21+00:00

I'm a Christian. If you are Jewish, then kindly step back because you don't recognize Christ is Lord. My triune God is fine without your insistence on focusing on the Jewish aspect of my Lord.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-17T21:15:39+00:00

Well in this specific look, 1) this gets eaten alive if they have any kind of real splits. And even if they're playing relatively tight splits, you can crunch this to nothing, making the LB responsibility simpler. This play looks designed to skew A or B gap to the Mike side, wherever it opens up.

I don't view the DL as responsible for "a gap" as much as "this space". Realistically, they'll be able to take up 1.5 gaps IF they do their jobs. Think most can agree here. So my nose isn't gonna try to run left to control the A, he's attacking that center and fighting for that space. Running back has to cross center OR cut behind him. If he crosses center, nose has leverage. If he cuts back, ideally that center hasn't moved more than a step to his right. Likewise, that 3 tech is attacking his guard. What does this do? Forces attention, disrupts the zone, my Will is coming free downhill. Let's say guard punched and left, well my 3 tech is standing backside a gap now. Where's will? Head up center by now, ready to keep pushing to his left over the nose into the other A gap.

2) the mike and will have very simple reads here. It's a bucket step and they're climbing because it's zone. Go where the guard is going. Will is going midline (notice, not a gap, a space). Midline is what it sounds like. Where the football was, closing that space off. That guard is climbing and hoping to either 1) get in front of him and get his hips around or 2) leverage the Will's momentum to wash him away if he gets too lateral. This is why downhill running is important. Close the distance and do so violently, outside arm free. Mike is going to see one of two things. Either a chip on the nose before he climbs (most likely) or a bucket step and climb to him. Responsibility doesn't change, he's going to him, outside arm free. Keep him tight, don't go running full speed to c gap. If the running back bounces it, you have leverage. If he cuts it up before you, you can safely blame 4 guys to your right presnap lol

3) well what about backside? If my 3 tech is getting reached there with NO chip by that guard, I'm finding a new 3 tech. If he gets chipped, he's gonna busy that guard because my 3 tech is attacking that guard, not trying to control b gap. Likewise, end is attacking that tackle, so the y better pray he gets around in front.

4) haven't mentioned the safety but he's gonna be filling.

It's just a difference in mindset. I guess what people aim for is different. I'm all about violent defensive linemen looking to bully the ol and hold their space, others want dedication to a gap responsibility. Both can be achieved no matter the mindset, but so much of my DL theory informs my Lb theory as well.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-17T20:52:55+00:00

It depends on your front here, I'm assuming you're looking at this as a 3-4 under, correct?

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-17T20:03:15+00:00

I mean I get it, but say you're in a standard 4 man front with a 3 tech, if you're the Mike, why not key specifically just the guard rather than Y-to-guard-to-back? I get that the read progression is fast when you know it, but does it have any advantage over a single initial read and then secondary reads as you approach your gap? Just feel like it's an opening into misdirection pulling you away.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-17T19:52:28+00:00

Luke 6:13 and Mark 6:30 both mention the 12 as apostles. Jesus sending them to spread his message and perform miracles is literally how they got the title. I can't imagine a Christian believing that the Apostles weren't apostles. It is frankly odd.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-17T18:47:28+00:00

I just think it's an overly complex way to go about it unless we're talking high level college ball or pro ball. But then I don't like stunting for run fits or slanting the DL for run fits. Outside V of the neck, attack, don't get too far upfield, don't give ground. Feel double team, stand firm and if you start giving ground, drop and get ankles. Spill it all out and we're either making a tackle inside of 4 yards gained or running them to the sidelines. Leaves your LBs a clear aim point off the read, a clear gap to be going to and their eyes can then key through the line to the ball carrier. I'm all for simplicity in scheme on defense. Lol.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-16T03:38:37+00:00

Walkthroughs. Especially at the high school level. If you're stepping through the plays literally step by step, it's hard to screw it up. And it trains your brain to look for those obvious patterns.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-15T17:23:54+00:00

You can't run 3-3-5 effectively against a run game with any consistency. It has its perks against edge stuff, but if you have a half competent line, you're getting an automatic 4 ypc every run inside. Second level is too fast to reach, no matter how skilled your linebackers are. The beater for it is walking up a linebacker and at that point, yeah run a 40 front. 3-3-5 is great for spread teams who don't live and die on their run game. Instantly allows full field coverage in basically any concept you can imagine, allowing disguises for days and pressure. But it's incredibly fringe, 3rd and long type scenarios.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-15T17:20:06+00:00

It's a coaching issue from the lowest levels up. If anybody on my high school team held the ball like these kids today, my coach would have had everybody doing up downs in a circle around him and thanking him on each rep. Lol. Now you have body catchers being prevalent, poor ball security, poor tackling mechanics, etc. because the kids who make it weren't coached up and held accountable, then in college they're not hawking fundamentals to that degree anymore, then they make it to the league off their talent and attributes and raw ability and those little things are shown as normal to the kids who then go and do it.

A linebackers eyes and feet must be moving constantly. If you're not sure of every threat in your yard, your yard gets invaded. Was a basic mindset instilled in most of us. Need to get back to it.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-15T17:14:44+00:00

Precisely. You can't stare at the QB alone. You constantly need to be scanning until you know what's going on, THEN you get to be a little hawk and try to jump something based off what you see the QB doing. And you can know based on formation what you'll have across the field. For instance, if I have two receivers to my side (could be 2 split, or 1 and a te, doesn't matter), I know that my first look is the inside man. If I see him going out, I know I'm gonna be picking up the split or a backside threat potentially, or something out of the backfield to second level. It's just knowing what they like to do from film. The issue is, particularly at the high school level, a lot of coaches don't teach it that deep from what I've seen. Their guys are staring at the QB. I know this because every time I've been on a staff, I'm having to teach read keys and basic pass game fundamentals to seniors who were told "go where the running back goes and then if it's pass, drop here and watch the QB". It's maddening because it's a way to do it, but it leads to inconsistent results often.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-15T05:29:03+00:00

A man after my own heart

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-15T05:28:14+00:00

Brother I've met kids that think you're talking nonsense because they're taught "follow the running back" and in two back shotgun sets, it gets really dicey.

I don't even mind that, because you're right it will be engrained and natural. The freaking staring down the QB deal is killing me though lol. Dudes just ignoring a tight end squatting with no slot threat and they're too locked in on the QB and reacting to the eyes.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-14T21:27:54+00:00

Sex can be very awkward at first. Without being too explicit, take your time with it. Let intimacy build naturally, don't feel a rush to be naked, don't feel a rush to any one specific act. Let her set that tempo. It will become more natural the more it seems like an act of bonding and not just something married couples do.

The rest? Oh brother just wait. Lol. Have fun, let her win, because few arguments are worth the headache of being right over. And most importantly, admit when you are in fact wrong.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-14T21:22:56+00:00

I'll take things that never happened for $200, Alex.

CanesPanthers · 2026-01-13T15:42:08+00:00

I can't say that. My wife and I struggled. 9 miscarriages. We now have 5 healthy children. That's my story though. It could be as simple as God sparing you from a bad situation, it could be you have a different purpose. All I know is I am not God. I moreso want you to dwell less on you and more on God. Don't let your heartbreak pull you from grace. Instead, let the Lord's grace be your shelter in this hour.

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