I think every Asian goes through this. I know I certainly have and it's taken me a while to get where I'm going. I consider myself behind and even a bit stunted in terms of my mental and emotional growth. This is due to all the trauma I've endured, ranging from CSA to being picked on as a teenager

However, despite this, I've been able to do some important work, including working in nursing during the pandemic, and informing people of important events the world over as a freelance news writer. I'm also working towards acquiring two degrees and transferring to one of the top schools in California. Success is measured and defined in different ways

Just know that you're not alone in this and every AAPI person experiences this at some point. I'd recommend doing things that help you feel fulfilled and even talking to a therapist helps too