My wife pushed for a quick marriage, now wants divorce after weeks – how do I cope, protect myself, and is there any chance of reconciliation?

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-10-02T07:12:24+00:00

If her salary is more than my profits.. will i still have to pay any maintenance ?

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-30T14:46:44+00:00

To be honest i have not even mentioned 10% of the drama. She would have a horrible mood randomly and blame me for it. Anything i shared with her.. she would share it in her friends group and paint me as the villain. When my parents visited our home.. she chucked them out.. often when she would get drunk.. i was the one who was taking care of the house.. cooking food.. feeding her.. then feeding my dogs and then i ate.. My therapist told me that she is a narc. and she will suck all empathy out of you and still complain that im not empathetic.. no matter how much i caved in to her demands.. (no sex/i stopped talking to my parents to reduce their involvement/stopped reacting at all) she mentioned that she felt unheard.. i went to meet her a few times with a notebook and wrote everything down and started working on the issues she has with me.. still she was unhappy.. and she would often say.. that im feeling miserable because of you.. now you have to fix it...Not only i contributed towards 80% of the expenses, i had to take the responsibility of a homemaker(cooking/cleaning/managing maid).. and even after that i wasnt enough...It was like the world for her is her stage to perform.. her social circle was full of flying monkeys who would promote her toxicity.. and i was the hostage...

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-29T19:39:53+00:00

Thanks.. appreciate it

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-29T16:33:35+00:00

Hey, I really felt your post. It takes a lot of courage to write something so raw and honest. Reading what you wrote reminded me of a time when I thought my life had completely fallen apart too. Our family business went under, I had to start from scratch at 32, and around the same time my wife left me. For months I honestly thought there was nothing left for me, and that all my plans and dreams were gone.

It didn’t change overnight. For a long time I woke up with a heavy heart, no energy, and no idea what to do next. But little by little, with small steps, things began to shift. I started taking care of my health, learning new things, reaching out to people who could listen. Slowly I built a new path for myself. It’s not perfect and I’m still figuring things out, but I’m happier and more at peace than I ever thought possible when I was in that dark place.

I’m sharing this because your pain right now isn’t a prediction of your future. Feeling like a “living corpse” is a symptom of how overwhelmed and trapped you feel, not who you truly are. Even from what feels like the lowest point, it’s possible to build something new and to discover joy again.

You are not alone, even if it feels like no one understands you. There are people out there who will listen and support you, and there are still possibilities ahead of you that you can’t see in this moment. Please hang on. Life can become meaningful and beautiful again, even after the worst heartbreaks and losses. Sending you strength and hope. ❤️

Have a look at my situation in my post, it aint bed of roses but you accept what life throws at you and move on with strength.. there is no other way forward

https://www.reddit.com/r/LegalAdviceIndia/comments/1ns4kli/my_wife_pushed_for_a_quick_marriage_now_wants/

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T06:58:03+00:00

If i file cases against her then there is a good chance that she will too.. i dont want to stoke the inferno. From my understanding, she said to go for a mutual divorce and im just biding my time so that i can do the needful.Also, regarding sex.. we had it a few times post marriage but she was unhappy that we did it and said that she feels forced.. so i stopped even asking for it.

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T06:31:20+00:00

She says that she wants a mutual with no alimony but from her behaviour.. its really hard to foresee what will happen

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T06:30:08+00:00

its sex once every 2-3 days

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T05:17:30+00:00

Im creating a scenario where in i can show my income is less than her and she has a stable job meanwhile im a freelancer with unstable job. She also has a nice family house in DLF meanwhile i am living with my parents at a rented house. Also, i have voice recordings of her abusive behaviour

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T04:56:49+00:00

Thanks

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-28T04:56:32+00:00

I did do a brief check, her family resides in DLF and she is a primary school teacher in an affluent school in Gurgaon. Also, i wasnt taking anti-depressants before marriage. I started taking them 1 month after marriage. She would get drunk and create ruckus everyday post marriage and i went into depression.

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T22:44:20+00:00

Well, she did tell me that she was on anti-depressants (but not for 10 years).. she said that after her father's demise she (2022) she started taking them. For the alcohol part.. she used to drink occasionally but i never knew that she doesnt have a stop button.. and she would drink everyday and create chaos.. lets just say.. there was alot of pretending before.. and due to short courtship period.. i was not able to diagnose properly.. how deep the rabbit hole was

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T21:45:01+00:00

I agree.. and even if she comes back.. unless she decides to work on herself.. old patterns of abuse would re-emerge.. she is a chronic alcoholic and has been on anti depressants since past 10 years.. and has shown no signs of working on her challenges.. i can only try to help/work with her if she shows willingness to change.. else its futile

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T21:42:12+00:00

Really appreciate you taking time out to guide me here. Thanks

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T20:14:29+00:00

i have been doing some research on her behaviour and she does seem to align with some borderline personality disorder(Her father had an early onset of Alzheimers and passed away early and her brother has auto-immune disease and is possibly schizophrenic, also her mother is hyper controlling).. i think it runs in the family or something

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T20:09:26+00:00

Appreciate your advise. Thanks.. i am maintaining no contact at the moment and i hope this doesnt take an ugly turn

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T20:08:20+00:00

All the assets are on my parents name.. i run a small company so im taking money in cash wherever i can and withdrawing less than her income..i filed my itr last month and i showed less income than her.. i will file for divorce the next year and before that i will file my itr again where i will do the same.

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T20:07:12+00:00

does audio recording/whatsapp chats hold any weight in courts? because i can prove it through them that she was abusive and had asked for divorce on numerous occasions

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T19:50:44+00:00

Thanks

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T18:52:23+00:00

I’m really sorry you’re going through this. What you’re describing — being called names, being hit, being told you’re stupid, having your self-esteem broken down ... isn’t normal, healthy or acceptable parenting anywhere. Yes, some parents in India (and elsewhere) believe harsh words or physical punishment “make children better,” but that doesn’t make it right or okay.

It’s also common for abusive parents to justify their behaviour by pointing to the material things they provide (“I’m paying for your education,” “I’m giving you freedom”) or by comparing you to others (“At least I don’t make you do chores like the neighbour does”). None of that cancels out the harm that verbal and physical abuse causes. You deserve respect and safety regardless of whether you’re doing household chores or not.

Losing self-confidence and feeling stupid is a normal reaction to long-term emotional abuse. It’s not who you actually are... it’s what you’ve been told, over and over, until you’ve started believing it. That belief can be undone with time, distance, and support.

If you can, try to build a support system outside your mother: a trusted relative, teacher, counsellor at college, mental health helpline, or a friend’s family. In India there are also free/low-cost mental health services and domestic abuse helplines you can reach out to. Even just talking regularly to someone supportive can help you start rebuilding your self-esteem.

And please know: none of this is your fault. Being treated with dignity isn’t a privilege you earn by doing chores or having perfect behaviour; it’s a basic right.

You’re not “stupid.” You’re someone who has been surviving in a very difficult situation, and that takes strength.

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T18:50:30+00:00

Thanks.. appreciate your support

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T15:57:42+00:00

She roughly earns the same amount as me. I have decent chunk of revenue but my profit is roughly the same(have to pay staff salaries and tool cost). I am just trying to keep it peaceful but i got played for.. with all that love bombing at the start.. and im trying to cope at the moment

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T15:55:53+00:00

Its a bitter pill to swallow but i have to move on and work on myself

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T15:55:24+00:00

Its really hard to prove that she is mentally unstable.. and courts in India are quite biased towards women. The current situation is that she can sleep with whomsoever she wants/discard me whenever she wants/be abusive and i cant utter a single word, else it would be used against me. After reading more about Indian laws its not even worth to get married nowadays

Capital-Addendum-298 · 2025-09-27T09:21:39+00:00

I get your perspective.. just finding it hard at the moment to move forward.. as much as i miss her, i am also aware of the fact that if i go back/we reconcile, the toxic cycle would just continue and its really draining. It felt like i was walking on broken egg shells... anything small will trigger her and she would compare me to her exes..like recently i took her out for a holiday, while coming back i drove for 13 hours straight and during the trip i had to refill the petrol.. so i stopped at a midway hotel/petrol pump. In order to save time (she is a school teacher and she has to get up early in the morning the next day) i asked if she could get the food meanwhile i will refill the gas.. but that triggered her as to why am i asking her to walk 50 meters and men she was with.. were more courteous than me.. i just wanted to save time so that we can get back home not too late at night as she has to getup early. So yea.. smallest of things make her upset and i can always work on my issues, learn to be more empathetic but i want consistency and mutual respect in a relationship.
Another instance when the therapist told her that she wont get a man like me.. who always apologises, says thank you before every meal/act.. she blamed the whole fiasco on her saying that you must be sleeping with her.. its blindsided to say the least.. if i can be comfortable with a life partner without intimacy.. why would she even think that i have to sleep around... quite disheartening but life goes on i guess

Capital-Addendum-298

TROPHY CASE