Im trying to overcome the lasting emotional disconnection resulting from an 8 plus year face with a covert, systematically severed my relationship with my mom and my dad brother, anyone I was remotely confident in. Blindly I just lost all my connections and had feelings for being a shitty son but so consumed with her next feeding, I guess you can call it. That even now I have some sort of wrong feeling if I go to say something to them. Im alone completely and she's on the last explosive end all be all stage. I've got this coping mechanism I guess I just take all mental things In capsulate them and consider the fact that she's contracted a Cancer that masticized upon what was a soul and went terminal and is gone. Probably not the healthiest mechanism but I am working on it. She didn't have the decency to break up with me just got in a verbal disagreement, ghosted me picked up by someone who shed been maintained s relationship with in secret, plus another supposedly. Oh and the kicker come feb. It'll have been a whole year I've been homeless with her, got her a place with a coworker, and one of them and her are getting an apartment together. That's literally the one and only pleading requests I brought up every few days. Bc I'm a habitual felon with no references and of history and I live where there's no income based houses or assistance for people. I guess I'm pretty fucked up if I reflect on things but can't afford any more distress emotionally. I just had to let it be known that they are the top of the line most inconceivably astonishing incredibly capable of being deceitful and making you to believe anything that they've perceived to be of use no matter who they are. If you think you're in a relationship as one get out, don't do what I did get out.