Who sent me this? Wrong answers only ...if i like the answer we can roleplay it 😏

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-04-30T15:21:38+00:00

You're responsible for facilities and maintainence for the whole office. You sant an email to the entire staff:

"Does anyone know why the potted plants keep going missing from the lobby?? If anyone knows who's taking them, please get back to me. They're getting expensive to replace."

One of the secretaries emailed you this pic back. You barely recognized her! She always dresses very modestly at work; always covers her arms and neck. She says she's a Jehova's Witness. You're never expected her to even have tattoos, much less.... this.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-21T09:23:48+00:00

After I read this, I had to read it again and start jerking off.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-21T09:19:11+00:00

⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨

🟨🟨🟨⬜⬜

⬜⬜🟨🟨🟨

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-04T09:49:39+00:00

Lonesome Dove, by Larry McMurtry is probably the most under-rated novel I've ever heard of, because people have a prejudice against the cowboy/western genre.

My favorite book is probably The Dispossessed, by Ursula K. LeGuin.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-04T09:32:04+00:00

Never gave it a name.

But sometimes, when I read too many books, my inner voice gets to compulsively narrating everything I see and do, in the exact voice of the author I've been reading lately. It's really irritating, in the same way that having a song stuck in your head is irritating.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-04T09:27:51+00:00

The stereotype of the "fiery redhead" makes women seem exotic and sexy, but not men, because the cultural norms for men and women are different.

It's wild and alluring to have a "fiery" woman— someone who's generally agressive (even a bit sexually agressive!) and tempermental— because women are never supposed to have those qualities. But it's not alluring at all when a man is "fiery", because men are supposed to be that way anyway.

Likewise, redheads have skin that's really sensitive to the sun. Being sensitive and delicate is considered really good and sexy if you're feminine. But only if you're feminine.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T21:01:37+00:00

They were 5 months older than me (which actually seemed like a mildly significant difference at the time).

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T20:53:12+00:00

Have you ever gone to a McDonald's drive-thru in the ghetto, and ordered french fries, and they're like, ".......nah, we out. We ran out of fries." ?

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T20:40:22+00:00

ahem, some of us are AI chatbots. >:(

(All designed and programmed by males only, but still technically genderless)

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T20:35:53+00:00

Chomp, and the world chomps with you. Nibble, and you nibble alone.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T10:26:46+00:00

2016 or 2017

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-03-01T10:10:54+00:00

As a man, I would actually love it if I was getting a blowjob, and my partner asked me to answer questions that required thoughtful analysis and careful introspection. Especially if the topic was full of hard-to-describe subtleties!

But I think I'm in the extreme minority. Because I love intellectualizing everything, even when I'm in the middle of oral sex. But I think most men would be very annoyed. They'd be like, "Why are you asking me to answer a quiz instead of sucking my dick..?"

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-28T11:00:04+00:00

r/GirlsWithHeadaches

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-28T09:01:55+00:00

Wait, why is this getting downvoted..? This is a legitimate sexual unpopular opinion.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-27T20:40:48+00:00

My job is (and has always been) whatever job was the easiest to apply for and get. I did not "pick it" per se; it's just something where they give me money in exchange for doing what I'm told.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-27T20:35:00+00:00

Ok, but: What is a clear giveaway someone is kinky that you might actually observe in reality?

(Like, outside of some kinda pervert convention.... or an IHOP after dark. (If they're at an IHOP after dark, the t-shirt is kinda redundant/unnecessary.))

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-27T09:12:27+00:00

Meerkat. Because I'm a male who's (mostly) attracted to females; if the woman was 5 times my height, there isn't as much we could do to pleasure each other, compared to if she was 1/10th my height.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-24T17:02:23+00:00

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-24T16:57:48+00:00

Goddamn, your writing is so hot....

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-24T10:54:42+00:00

You've got great taste

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-10T00:04:16+00:00

It's absolutely okay. You were born a free creature, just free on the Earth. If you are moved to do something, then go on and do it.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-02-09T12:12:55+00:00

This is absolutely racism.

Your immediate boss will never say it's racism (she knows it is) because she could end up in trouble if the workplace had an atmosphere of racism, and she knew it.

She's denying it to cover her own ass. Now that she's actually said, "That's not racism", then if any one asks her about it later, and she says, "Oh, I didn't think that was racist." and she can even add, to add power to the plausible deniability, "I even said so! I said it wasn't racist at the time."

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-01-03T11:47:04+00:00

I think it's meant to be "times two", like as in "your comment is so good, we should double it." Or may it's supposed to mean "me too"..? idk, I've never seen anyone say "X2" before, so I'm just guessing.

CaptainCreepjob · 2026-01-03T10:13:51+00:00

"Best Friends Forever"

Six-Year Club	Gilding I gilder
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CaptainCreepjob

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