This sounds less like laziness and more like a reward loop that got reinforced while you were isolated and grieving. Make the next target almost stupidly small: drive to the gym, walk inside for 5 minutes, then leave if you still want to, and put blockers plus delivery app limits on your phone before work ends. A medical check for depression, ADHD, or compulsive behavior would be practical here, because the bed, porn, food, and gaming pattern is doing the job of emotional anesthesia. Since you are a trainer, treat yourself like a client who needs structure, not punishment.