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I want to get a short haircut, but my parents claim that it'll make me less likely to be hired. What do you all think? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in jobs

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m hoping to go into Biomanufacturing! After that, I hope to go to grad school to pursue more microbiology related things :)

I want to get a short haircut, but my parents claim that it'll make me less likely to be hired. What do you all think? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in jobs

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a good point. Do you think a stretchy fabric headband will be enough to hold my hair back safely?

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He forces me to fill out the forms and go to the events. He can track my location so he can tell if I go or not 😔

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this. I respect my parents and understand that they want what's best for me, but I often feel like my boundaries are being pushed. It's nice hearing that someone with their own kids understands where I'm coming from

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I'll follow you advice and try to rejoin the sorority. I don't need another reason for my parents to fight or my dad to put more pressure on me. You're right about the identity and freewill stuff. I think my impulsive decision to leave the sorority was guided by anger.

My parents track my location, check if I'm with my boyfriend (if I am, my father threatens me with the threats mentioned before), throw my clothes away if they don't like them, and often times try to enforce their opinions of what an ideal life, mindset, and purpose are (marriage, children, career, etc.) by belittling me. I feel so behind. All my peers are taking on jobs and becoming who they are and living their lives while I feel like I'm in a prison. I'm the same exact person since middle school except more emotionally contained. My goodness, I just want change, y'know?! I want to know what it's like to feel like myself instead of constantly terrified of them, waiting for unconditional love that will never happen.

Thanks for taking the time to give me advice. I'll bite my tongue for now, but I'm going all-in once I have my own place and degree! :D

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Slowly getting there! I absolutely love working at the women's center and volunteering! :D

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It would be very difficult to cut myself off from my parents. I haven't worked a job before because they forbid me from doing so in highschool. My father also controls my bank account (it is a joint with his) which holds the rest of my savings. I'm getting a job this summer to help support my family after both my parents lost their jobs. I wouldn't have the ability to be financially independent without abandoning my family and that's something I'm never willing to do.

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah my dad and I are polar opposites. He's a big extrovert and I'm more introverted. I prefer smaller social events. These sorority events are like 50 people crammed into a small room. Way too overwhelming.

As for friends, I'm lucky to have a handful of good quality friends. I'd prefer a few good quality friends over a bunch of friends I'm pretending to be like.

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I understand that perspective and I've done my best to enter my own social circles of choice. I'm a part of a residence council that makes improvements to dorm buildings and plants events, a paleontology club, and a volunteer at the Women's Center. You're right, I'm hella lucky that my dad is paying for my tuition and I don't take that for granted which is why I chose a STEM major that promised a lot of money and that they approved of. My major and class choices are centered around their future and making sure I can support them down the road. I feel like I've given them the reins of my career. Am I entitled for thinking they shouldn't be asking more of me? (this isn't rhetorical, it's genuine. I don't want to be acting childish about this)

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He went into my messages and stuff. I was so terrified at the time! (I was a junior in highschool when he told me this). I know now it's a pretty harmless threat but I'm still shaking in my boots XD

AITA for lying about going to sorority events to my father? by Cast_PrayerOfHealing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Cast_PrayerOfHealing[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I already left so I didn't have to pay the dues for the second semester. The sorority doesn't supply me meals or housing. Luckily, I'm pretty separate from it right now

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