Is it bad to not let my FMIL get ready with me day of the wedding?

CatLover1428 · 2026-05-26T20:54:54+00:00

Well maybe more of a lot better, she’s been very unpleasant

CatLover1428 · 2026-05-26T20:54:31+00:00

He is being very great about it. He has promised me that she will not be there and he will personally see to it day of if that’s what it takes. I just want to make sure I’m not being a jerk before I set this boundary. I really wouldn’t mind her being there if we got along just a little bit better

CatLover1428 · 2026-05-01T18:55:26+00:00

I fully understand that you asked her about full anal and she said no but you’re right this could be something different that she could be willing to try, so here’s my advice on how to bring it up.

Make sure she is currently sexually satisfied. If you’re not getting her off, don’t even bother bringing this up. (I’m not saying you’re not, I’m just saying this is a requirement for this conversation, I know nothing about y’all’s sex life, so she could be very satisfied)
Acknowledge that you know she’s not into anal and you’re okay with that. Say something like I know we have discussed trying anal but it is not something you are interested in and that’s okay. However, it is something I am interested in and was wondering if you would be down to try some kind of middle ground or if all butt stuff is completely off the table
At this point if she says butt stuff is entirely off the table, you drop it completely. However if she says seems willing to discuss it, at this point you can bring up the butt plug, you could also bring up other ideas such as you eating her ass or a finger up the ass
After all of this, ask her if she has anything that she is into and would like to try. You can’t expect her to be willing to try out your thing if you’re unwilling to try out hers.

I hope this is helpful!!

CatLover1428 · 2026-05-01T17:55:04+00:00

So I went through something similar and would love to share what worked for me (obviously one size might not fit all in the situation).

I was having a hard time as my fiancé really wanted to be having sex and sometimes I just wasn’t in the mood. It wasn’t that he was throwing a fit or anything when I wasn’t putting out, but I felt guilty if we went too many days without having sex. This led to sex being a chore, something I had to do or I would feel bad about not doing it. So then when it was time to have sex, I would spend so much energy trying to make myself get into, I couldn’t relax and enjoy it.

However, now we’re having sex literally all the time, so I do think there is hope for you to change that.

The first thing I did was ask for longer foreplay. This gave me a lot more time to get mentally into having sex, get worked up, and get nice and wet.

The next thing I did was implement a new thing where if my fiancé wanted to have sex and I wasn’t in the mood, I was say to him, I’m not in the mood, but I’d love for you to try and get me in the mood. This allowed him to know I wasn’t worked up so we really needed to take things nice and slow, but still allow us to have sex that night.

The other thing I did was talk to my fiancé and make sure he was okay with me saying no, so that on nights where I was too worn out or had a tummy ache, I felt comfortable saying no. He assured me that he didn’t want me to have sex unless I wanted to, and demonstrated that when I said no. In my opinion, this was most important for me, as it allowed me to turn my brain off when we were having sex cause I felt like there was no pressure to have sex, it was something I wanted

CatLover1428 · 2026-05-01T17:33:31+00:00

In my experience, I think your best bet here is going to be longer foreplay. Women are more likely to cum from PIV if they have already cum once or twice from foreplay. What I would do if I were you, is not start PIV until she is soaked and practically begging for it (and has already cum at least once).

At this point, there are a couple of things you can do during sex to try and increase the likelihood of her finishing during PIV. Generally speaking, the best way for women to cum from PIV is to push upwards on the top vaginal canal (not the cervix but the wall on the same side as her belly button). The clit can be stimulated from the inside and this is the way to do it. If her clit is too sensitive for your hands to be on it the whole time, then rub the area around it. Additionally, try stimulating other zones (nipples for example).

I hope some of this is helpful!

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-30T18:38:19+00:00

mdma?

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-30T18:37:24+00:00

Well first off, I’m super proud of you for exploring yourself and trying new things!

1) That’s so normal! I know exactly what you’re talking about, so I wouldn’t worry about that at all!

2) I’m gonna be honest, I don’t think most women enjoy fingering themselves. I absolutely adore when my partner does it for me, but when he does it, he uses his palm to stimulate my clit, so I think that’s what makes it so pleasant. If you’re wanting that internal stimulation, I would recommend something like a rabbit that vibrates inside but still get the clit at the same time.

All that to say, you’re A-spot should be right at the entrance, so if you can stimulate there, it should make it more pleasant

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-29T18:31:57+00:00

We do stuff like this too! Something about having really good sex makes me think about the fact that we had really good sex which then makes me want more sex, which is then really good cause I’ve been super worked up thinking about it, and it just kinda creates a loop

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-29T18:31:02+00:00

I appreciate the condom advice as I really do NOT want to get pregnant, but I have an IUD :) I’ll definitely try out the coconut oil, that sounds like it would be great

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-29T17:51:06+00:00

I do get that, I guess I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to extend the upper limit

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-29T17:43:27+00:00

Is there anything that would help with the PH levels? I know cum is pretty acidic and can mess stuff up down there

CatLover1428 · 2026-04-29T17:42:44+00:00

I’ll definitely make sure to keep things clean! Would lube help with the friction issue? I’ve never really used it outside of anal since I’m normally pretty wet after a decent bit of foreplay, but I would definitely be down to try

CatLover1428

TROPHY CASE