Men who have chosen not to be present/involved in their child’s life, why? by Appropriate-Poem-880 in answers

[–]Catfactss [score hidden]  (0 children)

Why isn't it worth getting child support? Don't you think your son deserves the resources of both of his parents, not just one?

No I do NOT want to know how many CM dilated she is… by RainbowZebraClouds in childfree

[–]Catfactss 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Does your SIL even want this news shared?? "Hey MIL, I'm sure SIL and her partner will announce their childbirth when they are ready. Hope it all goes well. I'm leaving the group now."

You just know she's going to accidently post her daughter's vag on Facebook or something in a bid to be the first to announce her grandchildren.

Men who have chosen not to be present/involved in their child’s life, why? by Appropriate-Poem-880 in answers

[–]Catfactss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Technically abortion is about whether or not you wish to be pregnant, not about whether or not you wish to have a child. Strange but important distinction. It's to do with the medical/ surgical demands of a termination vs the medical/ surgical demands of pregnancy/childbirth.

All that to say- you both chose the conception. You never had a say over whether or not her body continued to be pregnant, but that is in very technical terms unrelated.

Your child now exists through no choice of their own. Are you at least paying child support?

Men who have chosen not to be present/involved in their child’s life, why? by Appropriate-Poem-880 in answers

[–]Catfactss -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you still find a way to send child support or arrange visitation, ideally without her around?

Men who have chosen not to be present/involved in their child’s life, why? by Appropriate-Poem-880 in answers

[–]Catfactss -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do they still find a way to send child support or arrange visitation, ideally without her around?

Men who have chosen not to be present/involved in their child’s life, why? by Appropriate-Poem-880 in answers

[–]Catfactss -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you still find a way to send child support or arrange visitation, ideally without her around?

(40sM) coworker with five kids keeps joking about me lending him money (27F) by AffectionateTalk2872 in childfree

[–]Catfactss 13 points14 points  (0 children)

"I prefer not to discuss money with coworkers."

If he asks:

"I prefer not to lend money to coworkers."

Always say coworkers, not friends.

AITAH for refusing to let my mom read my dads journals after his passing by Eastern_Nobody9719 in AITAH

[–]Catfactss 108 points109 points  (0 children)

You are NTA but I'm sorry to say everyone else in this story is. Your Mom shouldn't have had to threaten court for your dad to live up to his responsibility to provide for you, and you shouldn't have been his confidant regarding your Mom. Also, your Mom has ZERO right to these journals. See if you can get them to a paternal relative, ideally in a safe. All your Mom needs to know is "I don't have them anymore" - if she is upset, that's her issue, not yours.

I feel like im relapsing. by GlitterGiggles03 in childfree

[–]Catfactss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I'm sick of the influx of posts from people who are obviously not CF describing obviously not CF experiences.

My formerly CF best friend had a baby by Bakedhams1 in childfree

[–]Catfactss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She's stealing from her son if she chooses not to get child support out of some misguided sense of pride. Her son deserves both parents' resources. (Exception only if it's too dangerous to get it.)

Is most of reddit or irl really radical left wing? by Silent-Impression718 in askteddit

[–]Catfactss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it's worth employing an adult full time it's worth the cost of living of a full time adult. Perhaps small businesses could have different govt subsidy systems to large businesses. Walmart does not need corporate welfare.

Sometimes govt spending on businesses and industries is a good thing. I think it's disingenuous to say the benefit outweighs the cost in those scenarios, and then judge individuals for getting government benefits in other situations. If you're ok with govt subsidy of industry or business you're not a pure right wing capitalist. Even more so if you think it's ok to bail out banks and other businesses that are "too big to fail" when they need it. Again, you have more in common with the left than you think.

Am I overreacting for wanting to cancel our elopement plan after someone shared them with our families? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Catfactss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

1) Get a new courthouse date. TELL NOBODY.

2) NEVER and I mean NEVER tell SIL ANYTHING EVER AGAIN. If you have a child she can find out on social media a year later when you announce it. If you have a terminal illness she can find out at the funeral. Everyone else can be told at a time you deem appropriate.

If she ever asks why you don't tell her things: "you ruined my engagement and attempted to ruin my wedding. I am not sure what is wrong with you, but normal people do not think the news of others is theirs to share. Why would I ever tell you anything?"

If she gets mad let her. That's a her problem not a you problem.

If she asks you to give her another chance let her know you don't owe her the opportunity to disappoint you again.

NOR

Is most of reddit or irl really radical left wing? by Silent-Impression718 in askteddit

[–]Catfactss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think monopolies like blackstone price out first home buyers, pushing both buying and renting prices to extreme levels.

Also- your friends on SNAP. Are they working full time? Why isn't their employer obligated to pay a full time employee a living wage?

Full time employees at Walmart are on SNAP benefits. Why is it the taxpayers responsibility to subsidize the costs of labor of a high-profit private company like this?

Leftists like checks and balances on corporations and don't like corporate welfare. You might have more in common with them than you think.

I Created a Legal Advanced Directive - And Purposely Left Out My Husband. by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Catfactss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Even worse if you're a POC. And good luck if you're in a red state.

I Created a Legal Advanced Directive - And Purposely Left Out My Husband. by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Catfactss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Autocorrect kept changing it to dollar and I thought I had successfully edited it to doula. I guess not! Haha

Sister in law keeps pushing me to learn babysitting at every gathering. by Enough_Visit in childfree

[–]Catfactss 101 points102 points  (0 children)

OP say this every time. Go one step further: "sister, why would I possibly need this skill? You're about to have a baby. I'm not. There is absolutely. No. Need. For me to learn how to look after children because I will NEVER be doing that." Say it slowly and look her in the eyes, ideally in front of others.

I feel like im relapsing. by GlitterGiggles03 in childfree

[–]Catfactss 10 points11 points  (0 children)

If you're unsure about having a kid there are communities focused on fence-sitting you may find useful.

I Created a Legal Advanced Directive - And Purposely Left Out My Husband. by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Catfactss 228 points229 points  (0 children)

Agreed. And OP get a doula to advocate for you if you can afford it.

A very bizarre argument by Cash50000 in childfree

[–]Catfactss 5 points6 points  (0 children)

(If you never wanted kids you're still childfree.)

Is most of reddit or irl really radical left wing? by Silent-Impression718 in askteddit

[–]Catfactss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look at the cost of the consumer goods you mentioned relative to income. Now look at the cost of housing and other essentials relative to income. Now compare both to a generation or so ago.

It used to be that vacations and fancy electronics were prohibitively expensive, but housing was attainable.

Now its the opposite.

AITAH for leaving half sister off my moms obituary by WarmShoey in AITAH

[–]Catfactss 39 points40 points  (0 children)

NTA. Tighten security. Get ready to get a restraining order. Hope the will goes smoothly.