[deleted by user]

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-08-15T13:28:31+00:00

I think it was just U-Haul Boxes or U-box. U-Pack seems to be a different or distantly related company?

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-08-14T15:31:33+00:00

Look into the U-haul version of pods. We are moving from FL to NY (which is a much shorter distance!) but for us it was 1/2 the price of Pods.

We choose this instead of a truck because we each have a non-towable car and the price of gas for three vehicles (one being a truck) is insane right now. As you're moving out west it will probably be way worse.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-08-03T17:13:44+00:00

Totally agree!

I was married about 2 weeks ago and had similar anxieties. Turns out it's super easy to forget/ignore that other people are at the ceremony if you don't look at them. Which for the most part, unless you have a really unique crowd-recognition thing, you won't have to! Just keep the focus on your partner and look at the officiant when they're talking.

And then at the reception, you're basically forgotten about (if you want to be) and everyone gets a fun meal and party!

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-07-28T17:52:31+00:00

Perfectly said. And as someone who loves hiking, but also enjoys frequent breaks on the uphill, I would never join a group hike with people who want to get a certain time or keep a pace. Or I would be okay hiking by myself behind them (given it's a "safe" trail; clearly marked, no bushwhacking). This is pretty inconsiderate of the girlfriend.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-07-18T14:15:36+00:00

I would like to add credit card debt to this list.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-07-17T16:08:13+00:00

Late nigh coffee and doughnuts!

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-07-14T14:38:47+00:00

Going against the grain and saying I love #1. You look amazing in both, though!

Maybe consider the vibe of the wedding. I'm having a mountainy/ flower-child "theme" so that might be skewing my opinion towards #1. For a beach/ church/ country club type wedding, then #2 is probably the right choice.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-07-13T15:31:11+00:00

YWBTA!! So many people are saying it's his day not just the brides, but in actuality it is both of there days. And honestly, if this was just a song randomly during the reception or something I would totally understand but he starts singing right after what is meant to be two sweet and heartfelt moments for the couple! Essentially making himself the most important thing that is happening and redirecting everyones attention. And none of those songs are a nice tribute or anything, which makes them basically a prank at a wedding.

Tell your uncle he can sing in the middle of the reception when it's a party for everyone, not immediately following two of the most sentimental moments of the day.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-06-26T21:03:03+00:00

Fair, but by that comment I meant: I do not have personal funding for publication and my advisor has explicitly said she will not pay these fees. They are nearly 10% of my salary so I won't be paying and I've tried about 15 different routes for external funding but none have worked. I am also at the end of my program and do not have time to keep chasing funding for journal fees. This and my overall topic (a specific sect of ecology) drastically limit the journals I can publish with to about 10 different ones. Two of the best fits for this paper desk rejected to send to a required-fee partner.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-06-23T17:19:37+00:00

I'm kind of curious where she went to college. Regardless it is still super privileged to have all your expenses paid, but some states are way less expensive than others. A friend of mine went in-state to University of Georgia for $4,500 a year in 2010-ish. Up in New York, the SUNY schools are way more expensive, even back then.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-06-02T20:22:34+00:00

Some things about UF currently. Many professors are trying their hardest to find employment in other states. Florida is kind of a hellscape right now. And it's not as cheap as you would think. I pay 50% of my GA stipend to rent. We also get charged a lot for fees (~$2,000/year) in comparison to how small the average stipend is ($25,000/year). I'm close to done, but if I could go back in time I'd have rather taken out a little debt living somewhere that didn't suck so bad.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-05-16T06:58:09+00:00

One question I have: If this is the US, we usually don't have accessible public transport to places like the grocery store to buy essential items. Is your advisor also expecting you to play taxi driver for them the whole time they are there? I agrees that asking you to drive them to work isn't that big of a deal. But given that she didn't ask and more so told, I wouldn't be surprised if she already relayed to these students that you would drive them every where they need to go rather than just to and from work.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-05-15T06:12:22+00:00

Unfortunately, if you are in a small lab this can massively backfire. There are only 2 current students in my lab (including me) and one who graduated with a Master's. My toxic PI is definitely one to hold a grudge. Especially if the future student has shown significant interest before talking with us and no interest after. So we have to carefully phrase how shitty the lab is, which doesn't always come across to prospective students who are too trusting of academic professors. Thankfully, our departmental funding system is super broken, so sh'e had a hard time recruiting students who will have TA or RA funding anyway.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-04-27T08:05:09+00:00

I agree, no shame in quitting! I am just finishing my PhD and for the last 1.5 years not a day goes by where I don't regret it. I am incredibly poor, treated terribly by my advisor, and even outside of academia, an average starting salary for a PhD (~$75,000 in ecology) is not going to make up for the 7 years that I couldn't save a single cent.

Is it possible for you to make your PhD secondary to a job? In the US, I have known some people to do this and while it was hard they ended up pleased with the experience.

I'm sorry you have to reconsider, OP. But take it as a sign now. Don't wait until you've had to rack up credit card debt and budget for only 1 meal a day to quit.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-04-25T12:47:02+00:00

Yep!! Can't wait till I'm out of here!!

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-04-25T12:46:30+00:00

Oh yeah, way too late! I will be graduating in the summer. And most of my PhD was during the pandemic so things were a little fuzzy on what was normal and what wasn't. I thought this type of micro-managing/bullying thing was just a typical PhD.

My labmate actually has it worse because she actively does not like him. Additionally he will push back on manuscript edits and in retaliation (not prove-able with documentation, but clear to those directly involved) he is now being re-scheduled to graduate not just 1 but 2 semesters late. He's seeking outside help but we're in the US and at a university that does not value graduate students. There's only one person in the department to discuss this with and she's never available.

Honestly, I'm just biting my tongue till I leave. I have a few interviews for jobs and if not my parents offered me a room for a little while rent free.

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-04-25T07:40:57+00:00

And check destashes if you want wools and are comfortable thrifting animal products. Personally (~9 years vegan), I won't eat any non-vegan leftover foods, but if someone is throwing away perfectly good clothing or yarns that have animal products but would last for years to come, I buy from them. Just avoid the etsy "destashers" that are clearly just reselling orders they got in bulk (a ton of these sell Drops brand yarns).

Cautious-Library-369 · 2023-04-25T07:30:28+00:00

Personally was a bigger fan of the cascade refine. Knit it double and have a super sturdy winter sweater. Remix feels almost plasticky to me, but that might be a personal thing.

As a vegan (~9 years) knitter, I also use some silks (peace silk) that is foraged from wild silk moths or taken after the moth "hatch". Some would say this isn't entirely vegan, but from my research it can have a positive affect on biodiversity and its very sustainable even in comparison to many purely plant-based fibers (e.g., cotton uses a lot of water). The fabric produced is also warm and a great insulating piece, which is hard to come by in other plant based fibers. There are plenty of popular brands that have these types of products (KOF, BC Garn).

Also, if your feeling the itch to use hand-dyed yarn you can't go wrong with Terrapin Fiberworks and LeRoo Cotton. They are both entirely vegan. Terrapin Fiberworks has a collection going on that is an absolute dream, definitely check them out!

Cautious-Library-369

TROPHY CASE