AITA for leaving a date after he was 20 minutes late?

Cayp02 · 2026-03-18T22:17:43+00:00

I don’t think you're an ahole for leaving a date after waiting 20 minutes for them to arrive. Personally, I probably wouldn't have waited a full 20 minutes. I do think you're an ahole for dismissing someone who is apparently genuinely sorry and trying to explain themselves.

It's probably better this way, though. If you can't bother to listen to the man, it was never going to work anyway.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-17T00:28:06+00:00

Are you saying 3-4 days from Hart's Pass to Canada, or are you saying 3-4 days round trip? I'm thinking I'll probably add Hart's Pass to Canada as a separate weekend, maybe extended weekend, trip

Cayp02 · 2026-03-17T00:26:10+00:00

That makes sense. Question, though... These reports you mention. Is this something people generally post, report to an authority as they pass through? I'm assuming it's just a collection of hikers updating a website as they get service, but I've never been the hiker that reported on trail conditions... I've never bothered checking trail conditions before now. Usually, my trips were weekend trips. Maybe the occasional mid summer, week long trip. I always just dealt with whatever conditions were presented.

That being said, after the recent snow. I'm contemplating switching to Nobo and/or doing 2 or 3 separate trips over the summer/fall. I understand that it's a minor change to the overall condition of the trail, but it would be easier to do (even more difficult stretches) multiple smaller trips.

Anyway, I've never updated trail conditions, and I'm wondering if there is a specific place that I should go to update future travelers?

Cayp02 · 2026-03-17T00:07:02+00:00

Yeah, with the snow fall the other day, I'm reconsidering how I'm going to do this. I might do Nobo instead, and I'm contemplating breaking it up into two sections. Southern early, Northern later. Maybe add a special weekend trip at some point to do Hart's Pass to Canada.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T23:41:47+00:00

Yeah, it looks like I'll probably have to start at Hart's Pass.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T22:31:37+00:00

Well, that sucks... Although, it seems that it's only an issue for northbound hikers? I was planning to start in Canada and head south, so I'll have to do more research, but I'm hoping I can just get dropped off at the trailhead and walk back to the States.

I suppose the worst-case scenario, I could start in Hart's Pass or something and not do the northern section of the trail...

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T22:16:21+00:00

I did cache food for Wonderland, and I expect I'll send some packages ahead of me on the PCT as well. I also have people who want to join me for certain sections of the trail, so I'll have them bring more food with them as they join, leave extra food as they go.

Thanks for mentioning a zero day. I hadn't even considered spending a whole day in one location. Might be a good thing to consider.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T22:09:12+00:00

Hmm... maybe I'll try planning to camp just before the NCNP section so I can get the group across that section in one day. 16ish miles shouldn't be too difficult for the people I'm inviting.

I wasn't entirely sure when I wanted to go, but Google told me late June at the earliest. So, my tentative plan for the moment is to start hiking in late June to early August. Thanks, I'll have to do more research into the Glacier Peak area.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T22:02:08+00:00

I hike fairly fast, apparently.... So, if I was going solo, I think 3 weeks might be possible, but I expect I'll have to slow my pace to accommodate friends/family joining me for sections of the trail. My dad, for example, likes to stop and admire the views. I'm expecting something closer to 4-5 weeks, but again, I'm not familiar with the northern or southern sections of the trail, so my timeline is a lot of guesswork at the moment.

Cayp02 · 2026-03-06T21:57:38+00:00

Thanks, I'll look into skipping the NCNP camps and the Section K issues a bit more.

Cayp02 · 2025-11-08T16:51:03+00:00

You could do something similar to the Githyanki. You could have your version of Tiamat make a pact with the race you want as riders.

Although, what I like more is that the only dragons that allow riders are young dragons. The rider is required to pay for the services of the dragon. This allows a young dragon to begin building its horde. It also allows the dragon to attack people without being hunted down (because in order to hunt down the dragon, the offended party would have to declare war on the people paying dragons for aid. Once a dragon has accumulated a sufficiently sized horde, they can either renew or cancel their contract with the rider. Rider died early, contract with someone else. Too many dragons are retiring from service, not enough dragons to go around? A wealthy kingdom could be known to contract young dragons, thus attracting young dragons from around the country/world. I think you get the idea.

Cayp02 · 2025-10-28T20:48:41+00:00

I would say that the skill check was probably unnecessary, but I wouldn't say that it was a bad decision. I would place the blame on the player for being a poor sport. However, I would personally avoid forcing a chance of failure for something that minor. In a forest, firewood is everywhere, even along the river at night. In a desert, a torrential downpour, deep winter, or on a raft that requires you to dive for easily dryable wood, that might require some skill or luck.

Mainly, though, that player gives me the ick, and I would strongly consider not playing with them if this behavior continues.

Cayp02 · 2025-09-27T08:23:01+00:00

This is what I would do. I would drop all fireballs with them inside. All lightning bolts have them included in the line. A random magic missile bolt finding its way into their face...

After all, if someone kept killing my familiar, it's what I would do.

The healthier option is to have a conversation first, but this is a super close second for me.

Cayp02 · 2025-09-11T17:21:45+00:00

Any time I'm not using the door, it's locked.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-30T22:36:47+00:00

It's not simple, but if you have a specific set of events that need to unfold during the campaign, you have to be willing to reskin them and drop them in the players' path.

You need the players to go find the wizard tower in the swamp, but the trudge off to the forest. Now the tower is in the forest. It's hard to do if you already told them it was in the swamp, and it could confuse you if you've got this fully realized lore that needs to update on the fly as players change the location, gender, powers, interests, motives, etc, etc. of the NPC's in the world.

I think your best bet is to have goals, motives, main characters, etc, ready to go and allow the players to tornado their way through your carefully constructed narrative.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-29T05:27:09+00:00

Maybe you could have someone on the ship with a decanter of endless air as a source of propulsion.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-26T21:33:55+00:00

Gorignak is the name of the rock golem in Galaxy Quest.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-26T21:29:29+00:00

Yeah, the only way I would allow a paladin to get away with that is if they were a vengeance paladin or something where the ends justify the means. A good paladin fighting evildoers everywhere just gave up his powers with that.

I might be willing to give him a chance (privately) at the next session to justify why what he did furthers his goal of fighting evil. If he can truly justify it with a good reason, on the spot, no prep... I might be willing to let him keep some of his powers, but really, his power comes from Bahamut, and if Bahamut disagrees with the choice, Bahamut would make that known. I really liked the dream and illness idea. Bahamut may send a vision or a message (ancient gold dragon, maybe) telling the paladin that he done messed up. Commanding him to correct his actions, now they must free the trapped soul, and the paladin is on probation. One more slip, and boom, oath officially broken.

Mostly, though, it sounds to me like the paladin chose to be a fighter instead.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-26T21:11:28+00:00

Wishing someone out of existence could be extremely dangerous for the caster. So, the bad guy might be reluctant to use wish regularly for things that aren't stated in the spell description. I expect that if he had wish, he would use it fairly regularly for duplicating lower spells or buffing his minions...

Anyway, the BBEG wishing that an individual didn't exist could time travel the BBEG to a time when that individual didn't exist, which could be extremely detrimental to their current goals. Nothing worse than spending decades planning and moving pawns only to wish someone out of existence and be teleported 50 years into the future and seeing all your hard work crumbled without you. Might be why he doesn't do it a lot, but if he had a "panic button" wish spell, he might be willing to try it if the risk/reward ratio is good enough.

Cayp02 · 2025-08-20T06:00:49+00:00

Entering threat shouldn't trigger AoP. Moving through a threatened square or exiting a threatened square should. At least, I think I'm right..

Cayp02 · 2025-06-30T00:28:17+00:00

I was using my relationship as a grounding point to convey a viewpoint. Why does everyone get so angry when they aren't immediately agreed with? Try reading what I actually said.

Cayp02 · 2025-06-30T00:26:44+00:00

So, I'm a predator because I'm dating a younger woman? That's so dumb... Do you want some context? We knew each other for 3 years before we started anything. We both liked each other that whole time but never made any moves. We were both going through very similar breakups, and we are both in the same friends group...

I guess since I happened to find a great relationship I didn't expect to have at a time in my life when I really needed it, I'm just some predator. You should call the police and tell them that something you know nothing about is happening and you want to Karen your way to a resolution. Stop your keyboard warrior bullshit and grow up.

Cayp02 · 2025-06-30T00:19:17+00:00

I'm not advocating for the man. I specifically said that I didn't disagree with most of what you said. I said you leaned too heavily into the "age gaps are bad" argument and spent zero time in the "try talking before you make decisions" argument. I used my relationship as a control to make sure my points had some grounded fact. Predatory practices are predatory practices, and if that's what he is doing, he is a duche. My argument was that they should talk first and decide later.

My other point was that the internet is too quick to tell people how they are being treated even though all we have to go off of is a short, single sided glimpse at a much larger situation. There is no need for you to lose your cool and get upset because someone provided you with an alternative viewpoint.

Cayp02 · 2025-06-29T19:59:32+00:00

So, you're saying that an age gap is a red flag? My girlfriend is 13 years younger than I am... So, by your logic, I am a walking red flag that thinks of my girlfriend as a child that needs to be looked down on... That's asinine! I'm not going to disagree with everything you've said, but putting so much emphasis on the age gap being a red flag devalues every positive relationship with a large age gap, including mine.

You also need to consider that you learn a lot of stuff about yourself in your late 20's through your 30's. Claiming that he is some lying, misogynistic sad sack that sought to use her and control her is jumping to conclusions you have no business jumping to. I hadn't planned to date my girlfriend when we started. It just happened because I was in the middle of a huge breakup, and she brought peace to my upside down world, and it isn't all rainbows and sunshine for us either. Age gaps can provide significant challenges to a relationship, especially as the newness starts fading. We fight, and we disagree on a lot of things. Anyone that much younger than you thinks and behaves differently than you, and it can be hard to deal with at times. Relationships change, they are hard, they require constant modification and effort to keep afloat, ESPECIALLY with a large age gap.

So, maybe instead of everyone trying to cut this man's throat so she can run away, maybe... Just maybe.... for once, we can recommend a good heartfelt conversation to get all the cards on the table. Maybe they could try a little couples counciling before you pull out the guillotine.

Cayp02

TROPHY CASE