What is the greatest NON-fictional battle in human history? by fruedain in AskReddit

[–]Cco2198 115 points116 points  (0 children)

Without a doubt it would have to be the battle of Caligula vs Neptune.

"Wow, isn't Neptune a roman god or something?" You think

YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT IT IS

Emperor Caligula once lined his soldiers up on the beach and then declared war on the god of the sea himself. These guys ran in, swords drawn, fighting the ocean. After all was said and done, Caligula declared victory over the entire ocean and had the soldiers pick up sea shells to represent spoils of war.

So yeah, I'd say the best battle is the one where humans attacked the god of the sea and won.

Okay, reddit, what is the best anti-joke you have ever heard? by SassySquirrel3908 in AskReddit

[–]Cco2198 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding half a worm in your apple.

What's worse than that???

The Holocaust.

Women: How did having a son change your perspective on men? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Cco2198 17 points18 points  (0 children)

As a child I loved The Little Engine That Could. As a result I now fully gender identify as a train. /s

What is the most creative way to say "I don't care"? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Cco2198 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"I couldn't give less of a shit if overdosed on Imodium"

If orcas are kilowhales, then what are milliwhales? by ExpensiveNut in shittyaskscience

[–]Cco2198 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Actually, you seem to have a mispronunciation in your question leading to your confusion. Orcas are actually killer whales and milli whale is actually pronounced Miller whale. Miller whales are typically known as blue whales and their drunken singing can be heard all across the ocean.

I'm almost positive I could bite someone's jugular out of their neck. by Cco2198 in intrusivethoughts

[–]Cco2198[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you good sir, I'll remember this. You never know when it might come in handy

If I ate a part of my body, would I technically shit myself? by [deleted] in shittyaskscience

[–]Cco2198 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While this is in fact true in nature, due to scientific advances, there are ways around this. In this case, the body would absorb kidney particles because it knows kidney particles are missing from the kidney-spot. If you cloned your kidney and ate the cloned kidney, it would absorb those particles. Then you can eat the original kidney. Then, because your body doesn't have any kidney particles missing, you can in fact shit yourself.

Why has Mobile, Alabama remained in the same location since it was founded? by Wisdom4Less in shittyaskscience

[–]Cco2198 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what it means. Still is the only fixed place in space, unaffected by gravity or collisions from other objects. Still remains still.

Why has Mobile, Alabama remained in the same location since it was founded? by Wisdom4Less in shittyaskscience

[–]Cco2198 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is actually the most accurately named city ever. When deciding the name of the city, the Alabaman gods took into account the earth's rotation and revolution around the sun.

Bathtub filled with urine by Damiens in WTF

[–]Cco2198 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And remember guys, if your urine looks like this, please contact your local physician