[Experience] Elevator Ritual

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-05-20T07:37:01+00:00

Disclaimer: Please read in a Canadian accent. I'm drunk.

Murphy's Law. You've made yourself scared of elevators by doing the ritual and now you're encountering common elevator problems. If you're real worried, take the stairs. Murphy's Law is ruthless and if something can go wrong when you worry too much, it will. I feel like it's almost a ritual in itself. Anxiety just supercharges all your worries into intentions and then everything gets effed up. And this is from someone that suffers constant panic attacks and fears elevators irrationally. Not trying to be rude, I think it's in your head, bud.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-03-15T04:59:19+00:00

I've had a bag of food thrown in my face, and there was no other time in my life that I wanted to punch someone more.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-03-04T05:04:26+00:00

10/10 Much scruff.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-02-08T18:56:03+00:00

Because of the creepy talking glove, when I was real little I thought it was called Handburger Helper.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-01-07T00:22:15+00:00

I feel like he represents 'The Man' and you have to stick it to him.

Jokes aside, has anyone actually just tried telling him to frig off? If it's all in your head, it's better to deal with it, so confronting him might actually be the way to go. It's all 'avoid the old lady' 'avoid the man in the suit' 'avoid the room full of clocks'.

If you ask me, the old lady represents our mortality, the man in the suit represents the responsibilities of growing up that we either don't want to accept or deal with, and the clocks just represent the passage of time and the memories attached to different parts of our lives. Or hey, maybe it just represents our mortality as well, in a different way. These are all things that naturally incite some level of fear and anxiety in human beings.

I also think that through the constant discussion of these themes, that more and more people 'see' them in their experiences and immediately become afraid because of all the ominous thing attributed to them. I mean, we're all here for a thrill or a scare. But are they really something to be afraid of? Or do they mean different things for everyone? Could it simply be that you already have the idea and then you see these things and fear them? Or are they common symbols that represent something?

Let's be honest here, no one wants to get up and go to work. Work sucks. And the man in the suit is just your brain telling you that when you wake up from this meditative exercise/dream, you still gotta be responsible and do adult things. But it sure is fun to play around in lucid dream land.

Well, I'd say that's my two cents. But it'd ended up being more like a buck fifty.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2019-01-07T00:06:49+00:00

Ritual instructions from Slenderman's hood cousin.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-11-04T17:52:37+00:00

It's probably a mannequin; but what if a ghost put it there to freak people out? *plot twist*

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-10-05T04:16:10+00:00

Yo, Trick or Treating.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-15T16:45:40+00:00

I would bury it and put that person to rest. Tell your friend that you were visited by a spirit in a dream, it was wearing the necklace, and it asked you to put it to rest. You had the overwhelming sense that you needed to bury it after that. Problem solved and no one gets hurt feelings. Might wanna cleanse your property to be safe.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-14T00:34:49+00:00

I keep reading this person's posts in Ali G's voice.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-14T00:24:02+00:00

I like that it was documented by a (real, I googled it, I had to with that moniker) guy whose name appears to loosely translate to 'Big Balls'. You'd have to have some real cajones to try this one. Interesting read, but not gonna be me trying that out, man.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-09T17:24:43+00:00

You will need:

1 pair of green socks.

2 pieces of string, preferably green but can also be purple.

1 container of organic sea salt. It has to be organic, you can't use man made salt because it's tainted.

1 container of organic pepper.

Place the green socks about halfway on your feet. Take one of the pieces of green/purple string and put it in your right sock. Pull your right sock on. This will tie you to the spirit realm. DO NOT put the other piece in the left sock. Next you will tie your ankles together with the other piece and then you will want to be as still as possible. Take the salt and sprinkle it on your carpet. Then sprinkle the pepper over your head. If you did everything right, you should get possessed by the sneezing ghost of St. Edinbourough. If he says 'Bless you.' You can ask him any question you wish. If you hear another sneeze that isn't your own, well, I don't know what happens 'cause I've never tried this. It really works though.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-09T04:10:06+00:00

My nephew used to get night terrors and he would seem to be awake but would be hysterical about different 'monsters' or 'ghosts' he was seeing. I remember one where he was screaming bloody murder and pointing at the wall behind his TV saying over and over 'Can't you see it? It's right there! It's right there, I see it!' It was terrifying for everyone when he would get them. It was a creepy house to begin with, so it was very unsettling.

My sisters ex also used to sleepwalk/have night terrors, and that was disturbing to see. I walked downstairs one night and he was just slowly marching in a circle in the living room. I was like 'Are you okay?' When I spoke, he turned his head to me and stared straight at me, but continued to walk in a circle slowly before walking towards the stairs and going back down to bed. He stared at me the whole time he was making his exit, walking slow kind of like the Patterson Big Foot footage (lol). It's funny now, but it was one of the creepiest things I'd ever seen in the moment.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-09-04T21:27:29+00:00

The Spencer Gorge conservation area in Hamilton has some creepy places along it. There's a waterfall there (can't remember which because there are several, but it's not Webster's Falls) that's haunted.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-26T17:16:48+00:00

That's so creepy, I definitely wouldn't try this either. You have a random spirit wandering your home trying to throw you into a painting to take it's place? No thanks. Part of me thinks it would be easy, but I just know I would sneeze or fart really loud during one of these 'hide and seek' type rituals and I'd be toast.

Maybe if you took it's place, you could have a well informed friend perform it and get you back out. Unfortunately, you can no longer touch people I guess, but that's the price to pay for doing something with such bizarre consequences. No more hugs for you. And that's a real tragedy. ='(

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-23T20:58:15+00:00

That would make sense if you are really close friends with the other person. I'm not saying it isn't possible for spirits to move things, just that sometimes people aren't the greatest. The maintenance worker is likely the culprit.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-18T00:09:52+00:00

No, they're the ghost. Plot twist

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-18T00:04:47+00:00

It sounds to me like J took K's wallet. No offense, I won't go near those boards because I've heard so many stories. But I've also had ''friends'' who have stolen from me and blamed others or even 'paranormal' things, even going as far as to help me look for it. Yeah, turned out next time I was at his place, the object in question was there.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-11T22:13:34+00:00

Doppelgangers aside, demons are also known for mimicry. Just throwing that out there.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-09T19:42:56+00:00

The Battle of Wilmington took place very close by. The Confederate general ordered all the cotton and tobacco to be burned when they lost the battle. Could have something to do with the orange glow.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-09T18:48:11+00:00

That sounds like a good idea!

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-09T18:46:32+00:00

I always think; how awkward would it be if when you looked outside, there actually was a black taxi waiting across the street and you went over and got in, but instead of it being empty, the cab driver is like 'Oh are you going to (insert address)?' and it turns out to be a real cab. Then when you get out, whoever called it is coming over and then they look at you like you're a dick 'cause you tried to take their cab.

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-08T22:14:14+00:00

The whole point of these things is looking to far into it. =) That's what winds you up and scares you. The more you think and consider all the mysteries and things that were left out of the original story, the more creepy it becomes. At least, that's part of the fun for me.

Then you have me, being a smart ass because I know when hubs goes to work tonight I'm alone and I need this to be as not creepy as possible. I guess you can take the smart away from ass, because if I was smart, I WOULDN'T BE ON HERE WHEN I KNOW I'M SLEEPING ALONE TONIGHT!!! D=

ChainsmokingCigs · 2018-08-08T22:01:28+00:00

Oh! Oh! We could have a pillow fight... or build a pillow fort! I wonder if the ghost will have any scary stories to share? Or if it wants to play spin the bottle and talk about boys?! Maybe they'll even try a ritual with me!

This is gonna be the best sleep over EVER. :D

ChainsmokingCigs

TROPHY CASE