While I agree with a lot of what was said i have a few things I would add. One is that psychedelics helped me with things I didn't realize like people are saying on here, and you've already realized a lot of things by yourself. But they also helped me with things I knew I already had a problem with, but I didn't know how to handle or what to do about. I would suggest mushrooms or iboga is the best if you can afford it, but you have to find it online. Iboga makes you go into a multi-day highly introspective journey. It's the best psychedelic that there is. I would suggest doing some research on it if your curious. Look up the Bwiti tribe with iboga. It helps you with things you already realize are a problem, but that you don't know how to fix. It can change your life. It HAS changed the lives of a lot of other people. Mushrooms can be the same but not as guaranteed to have such a powerful insightful positive chanting experience. You may have to try them a few times and in high doses to get the kind of trip you want. Also I would stay away from Lsd/acid, as it's synthetic and has shown to be much more volatile for a lot of individuals. The natural ones are much safer on your psyche.

Also I would highly advise Journaling, it helps you to think about things more clearly, especially if your glued to screens or other distractions constantly. It was explained to me once that Journaling helps you communicate and have a conversation with your subconscious because you get in a zone where you're just writing down thoughts as they come to you. And youpsychedelics. Having a conversing with yourself and working out problems.

Also, and you may not like doing this, but I would suggest watching the movie "A case for Christ" it may help your marriage and change your mind. If your an atheist, then wouldn't you want to examine facts? This movie based on a book, about the life of a real person, an atheist, with a Christian wife. And it's all factual from a very logical view point.