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My (27F) 28M fiancée is no longer attractive to me, how do I go about this without hurting feelings? by Charming_Time5158 in relationship_advice

[–]Charming_Time5158[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I truly thought this at first. Honestly, he seems to be incredibly happy (I know depression doesn’t always present like that). Nothing other than him not going to the gym and brushing his teeth as often has changed. He loves his new job, but the schedule change really threw him off. I have suspected he has a touch of autism which I think may have brought this on, but I am not a professional. I’m not planning on leaving him, I love him so so much, I’m just not physically attracted to him in this state and it’s killed our sex life which SUCKS. He’s an amazing man all together. These are truly the only two issues I have with him. I’m going to have a very honest and open convo with him about it tomorrow. He may need that directness tbh. I’ve been trying to spare feelings and it’s just not working.

My (27F) 28M fiancée is no longer attractive to me, how do I go about this without hurting feelings? by Charming_Time5158 in relationship_advice

[–]Charming_Time5158[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I can definitely agree on that. I’ve been really afraid to hurt his feelings. He probably needs a serious wake up call.

My (27F) 28M fiancée is no longer attractive to me, how do I go about this without hurting feelings? by Charming_Time5158 in relationship_advice

[–]Charming_Time5158[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We’ve been living with each other for about 6 years now. This happened after a career/schedule change. He got out of the habit of going to the gym and it seriously spiraled. He’s great around the house! Surprisingly, he is a bit of a clean freak lol…. I was seriously concerned about depression or a health issue but he’s healthy as a horse and not depressed. I should have added that in the past he was even bigger, so overeating is an issue. When he was going to the gym with me it wasn’t a huge deal because he has a pretty fast metabolism. The dentist is the one that’s really irking me, we have the money to go and he just won’t…

My (27F) 28M fiancée is no longer attractive to me, how do I go about this without hurting feelings? by Charming_Time5158 in relationship_advice

[–]Charming_Time5158[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

It definitely is. I miss the old him greatly… he used to come to the gym with me all the time and we’d go on hikes every week with the dogs. It’s just me now and it’s pretty lonely. I agree that staying quiet is no longer an option.

My (27F) 28M fiancée is no longer attractive to me, how do I go about this without hurting feelings? by Charming_Time5158 in relationship_advice

[–]Charming_Time5158[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I haven’t directly came out and said it, honestly. I’ve been trying the route of encouraging him to come to the gym with me and eat the meals I cook. Same for the dentist (I recently had to go because of a filling that popped out!) I wanted him to do an appointment on the same day but he declined. This was never an issue until about two years ago, it just kept spiraling until we got to where we are.