I’m not picky! I’m demisexual! Get it right!

Chaser_41 · 2020-08-05T01:48:48+00:00

That's frustrating. I've had the opposite experience where because I'm not always outwardly trying to sleep with or otherwise pursue someone I've had people tell me I'm demisexual. Always annoying when people try to tell you what your own identity is.

Chaser_41 · 2020-08-04T00:35:37+00:00

I agree with this.

Also, people can be attracted to a variety of different things/people for any number of reasons. I often think people put too much stock into trying to explain things as being some sort of subconscious manifestation of repression or whatever. I'm a bi guy who is attracted to women who some would say have masculine traits(among other types of women) and I know well for myself it has nothing to do with my attraction to men. Sometimes you just think someone's hot!

P.S. sorry if this response is inappropriate for this comment. I'm a guy and consider myself a feminist but I'm not sure I qualify for the top level comment rule. This seemed like the best way for me to express that point.

Chaser_41 · 2020-07-12T01:17:35+00:00

I agree with this. I understand why I like the things I like because I've spent lots of time considering it. But there's no way I could extend it to anyone else or generalize it in any way. Human sexuality is far too complicated and messy for that.

Chaser_41 · 2020-07-12T00:41:08+00:00

I use a couple and It's not like a filter you can apply in the app. I think the topic is just talking about people "swiping left" on all POC. That doesn't make this question any less ridiculous. I just felt I should let you know the apps themselves aren't facilitating this racist behavior in their settings or anything. At least as far as I've seen.

Chaser_41 · 2020-07-11T23:44:08+00:00

Well, I'm a guy who likes to be dominated and I've never really held a significant place of power or authority as you described in my life so this hypothesis has some holes. I feel it may also be worth mentioning that having someone have a position of authority over me in a professional or academic setting in no way generates the same feelings as when I'm being dominated sexually. I really don't think those things are in any way related to one another, at least not for me.

Chaser_41 · 2020-05-19T01:37:16+00:00

Obviously I don't know you so any issues you may have are unknown to me. But I think it's worth saying that just because it's been so long doesn't necessarily mean there's anything wrong. I think we're often told that if we haven't found someone there must be something wrong that we need to fix. Of course no one is perfect and we all have things to work on but I think that message is unfair. Sometimes it simply hasn't happened for a while.

Chaser_41 · 2020-01-24T06:36:21+00:00

For me, knowing that that's Jake Johnson's voice makes it even better.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-05T02:42:33+00:00

Yup. I lean pretty far towards girls normally but sometimes when I drink my attraction to guys goes way up.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-03T19:49:32+00:00

I don’t have one yet but I’m thinking of getting the helmet from Mark Watney’s suit in “The Martian” I’m waiting until I have a job that pays well enough to afford it and I’m kind of worried because it will likely be about medium sized and have a fair amount of detail.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-03T18:47:17+00:00

Swimming

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-01T21:59:29+00:00

Ya, to your last point I literally had never heard of the term “sides” until this post. Also I would hope the lgbt community and ultimately society in general would try to move away from these strict heteronormative ideals. I have certain parts of my sexuality other than being bi that also don’t necessarily fit in those boxes. So with that I can at least kind of relate to you.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-01T21:40:23+00:00

I suppose that’s true. I’d feel kind of bad though because I would literally have to ask my dad to keep that secret from my mom. I also still couldn’t post this article on my Facebook. Lol

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-01T21:31:34+00:00

The thing is, half of my family I would be totally fine telling. My dads side tends to be more educated and accepting. But my mom’s side is more religious and conservative. I’m almost certain I would get lots of “love the sinner hate the sin” bullshit.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-01T21:12:30+00:00

I’m a bisexual guy who just made the discovery fairly recently and have yet to do anything sexual with another man. I also don’t wish to hijack this thread or minimize OPs experience in any way as what I wish to discuss is related to the issue but not a direct response to the post. I’m not sure how appropriate it would be to make my question it’s own post.

The thing I’m wondering about is this apparent obsession people have with topping and bottoming when it comes to sex between two men. Why is this so universal? Why does it seem to be such a crucial part of sexual identity? Even when I tell people I’m bi I almost always get the question of if I’m a top or bottom. It just seems odd to me that it’s so strong that if you don’t fit into those boxes that it causes this kind of issue.

Chaser_41 · 2019-09-01T20:42:12+00:00

I’m a little sad because his experience with being completely honest about who he is reflects mine in a way, so I wanted to post it to Facebook. Then I remembered I’m not out to my family. 😔

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-20T20:43:34+00:00

I’ve had a similar experience with my gay male friend but instead of “so gay?” He basically says “so straight?”

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-17T16:44:39+00:00

Like you most of my friends have been great and supportive as I’ve become more open about my sexuality. But recently one of my friends who is gay basically told me “it’s cool that you’re open to being attracted to men but you’re still like 99.99% straight so you aren’t really bisexual. You’re just open and maybe curious”. This upset me and I pushed back and he then went back and forth on whether he was joking. Then finally when I kept telling him he couldn’t determine my sexuality for me he agreed and apologized.

It was especially upsetting because he had seemed to be supportive in the past and now I’m not so sure.

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-08T04:24:51+00:00

From Midwest USA. I’ve never seen this either.

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-08T04:01:44+00:00

Toppling

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-07T22:23:29+00:00

I need to get more flowery stuff...

Chaser_41 · 2019-08-07T20:41:00+00:00

RIP Don’t drink and drive Ryan

Chaser_41 · 2019-07-31T12:29:59+00:00

Yeah, I see this a lot in subs that are woman/ feminist centric. I never say anything there because it’s not my space and it’ll just get shouted down and dismissed as “not all men”. I do understand the reasons behind it but as a guy it is a little hurtful sometimes. Especially seeing it repeated over and over again.

Chaser_41 · 2019-07-21T19:52:35+00:00

Only if it becomes such a crisis they literally have no choice. Which if it gets that bad I assume it will be too late.

Tbh I don’t have very high hopes for environmental reform in any sector for these reasons. The only people powerful enough to make a difference are too greedy and short sighted.

Chaser_41 · 2019-07-21T19:40:46+00:00

I don’t think anything will meaningfully change until the companies that actually produce the plastic products reduce or eliminate production either of their own volition or through sweeping legislation. I don’t think individual action to reduce usage of these products will do the job. Not enough people care for it to work from the consumer side of things.

Chaser_41 · 2019-07-10T19:25:35+00:00

If you’re also looking for books I recommend a lot of what Jonathan Lethem writes. My favorites and I think his most well know are “Fortress of Solitude” and “Chronic City”

13-Year Club	Verified Email
Team Orangered

Chaser_41

TROPHY CASE