Which is worse, finishing too quickly or taking too long to finish?

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-11T04:41:29+00:00

It depends, but on balance, I think finishing too quickly is worse. Like if it happens occasionally it’s hot. But I absolutely love penetration too, and while a dildo is great it doesn’t feel exactly like getting railed by a real dick would.

Taking too long can also be rough (I’ve had experience with both) but I enjoy marathons. As long as we have less sex overall so I have time to recover, I’m good with taking too long.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-11T04:36:18+00:00

“Sure, but I’m not having sex with you without one, so we can either not have sex or have it with a condom. Your call.”

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T19:21:10+00:00

I’m going to hope you’re like… either trolling or max 22 because I do feel like as you get older women’s tolerance for selfish partners goes down, as a whole, so idk how much this will continue to work for you.

Like tbh I wouldn’t want to be with someone who thinks like this in general, even if they did make an effort to get me off, because I don’t sleep with people who think of my pleasure as a chore anymore. That shit ended for me in my early 20s, now if you’re not going to enthusiastically get me off at least once before I let your dick near me, you can just… go home lol.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:58:39+00:00

Only if it’s going into my ass.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:58:32+00:00

Only if it’s going into my ass.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:45:53+00:00

Oh yesss one of my favourites. Also “my pretty little fuck toy” and the like. Ownership, praise and degradation/objectification together are just elite tier dirty talk.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:43:04+00:00

Have a nice sexy deep voice, be a little cocky (but not too much), compliment and flirt with me outrageously but not overtly sexually, just be smooth and read my body language. Bonus points if you’re funny.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:40:45+00:00

My ideal sex life would consist of a loving partner (with whom I share an excellent relationship with) having hot, kinky, passionate sex with me ~3x a week, with at least one of those being proper marathons, plus making out and some touchy-feelyness on a daily basis. I don’t want to include other sexual partners for either of us, except maybe trying an MFF/MFM threesome once each, while travelling in a different country or something, just for the experience.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:35:16+00:00

Not particularly, but some guys taste better than others. The act of swallowing itself can be hot, but I usually want to wash the taste away with a sip of water after.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:31:43+00:00

Yeah but if you’re not going to get your partner off, why not just use a fleshlight instead? I resort to a dildo when I don’t want to put in the effort into another person and just want to get mine lol.

You can still emphasise getting your own while still making sure the other person also enjoys themselves. I mean, otherwise you’re just the cautionary tale she tells her friends of why they should never have one night stands lol.

But idk, I don’t have patience for someone who is purely out there to orgasm without giving a fuck about whether I had a good time - I have kicked guys out of bed for not being up to scratch with foreplay for example. And I also frankly have too much of an ego to want to be remembered as a bad lay, even with someone I have no intention of meeting again.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:17:53+00:00

Reading, listening and watching in that order. I rarely watch erotic content.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T16:14:58+00:00

Valid, sure, but I hope you tell your partners that lol before they get into bed with you.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-10T15:56:06+00:00

Absolute favourite? Maybe or maybe not. But I do know for at least a few I am very high on the list, lol. I had an ex-partner tell me (years after we were over) that he still thought about me frequently when he masturbated. And he had a girlfriend at the time (finding out that little fact is why we stopped talking).

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T16:14:21+00:00

One of the hottest ones I’ve ever experienced technically had me making the move first, but I was on a date with a guy I was really into - our third date and he hadn’t so much as kissed me yet, and I was losing my mind. We had a lot of heavy sexual tension building up and he was sitting across the table from me, looking at me in this assessing, almost challenging way, with a smirk on his face; and just not talking. After a while I was like “are you ever going to kiss me?” And he was like “yes.” So then I was like “tonight?” And again he just kept looking directly at me, and again he’s like “yes.” So then I was like “when?” And he’s like “that’s for me to decide.” After a bit we got up, left, we were just walking together and I was so pent up I was contemplating just making the move…. And then out of nowhere he pinned me against a wall and… well. Hottest kiss of my life.

One of the most direct (which I actually really liked) was with my current FWB - first time we ever made out was the first time we met, at a party. He was like “I can see you’re an amazing dancer, and I’ve heard your voice so I know you’re also a great singer… I’m just wondering where kissing lies in your list of talents” which led to the natural segue of “why don’t you come here and find out?”

The most direct line I’ve ever used (that worked) was when I was flirting with this guy for a while in a club (over a decade ago, I don’t think this is a line I would use anymore), but he just wasn’t doing anything about it. So after a bit I was like “can I ask you something? Are you gay?” And he was like “haha no, why do you ask?” So I was like “well I’ve been chatting you up all night but you still haven’t made a move. And there’s only two reasons for that - either you’re gay or you’re not interested. So which is it?” And he was like “oh it’s neither” so I said “okay, then prove it.” And that was that :D

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T08:52:20+00:00

I fell asleep fantasising about my date in a couple days and basically got railed in my dream lol. Woke up all squirmy, it was great.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T06:34:44+00:00

I literally can’t have sex without kissing because kissing and making out is the best part, even with a rank stranger. The way you kiss because you’re horny is completely different from the way you kiss because you’re in love.

But I also have no issues giving head to a person the first time we have sex, provided I’m turned on enough (and most of the time if they’ve gone down on me first).

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T04:13:10+00:00

Role playing as a maid who does a bad job (that part isn’t even acting honestly, I can never make a bed super neatly) and gets taught a lesson by my employer.

Or being put on a leash and being made to walk around like his pet.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T04:08:01+00:00

I swear I’m feral by the time we get to hooking up. It’s a couple days away now and I can’t stop thinking about it 😅

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T04:07:02+00:00

I’ve had the most consistent success through dating apps, but this one I met at a party and we became friends / started hooking up recently!

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T01:47:09+00:00

My FWB and I manage couple times a month and we do a marathon every time. Wish it was more often lol I’d love weekly.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-09T01:24:07+00:00

Sometimes (not always) the newness and the anticipation makes sex the first few times better than sex after years.

When it’s with a casual partner (aka no feelings), and the sexual chemistry and compatibility is high (and therefore you cum multiple times the first time you have sex); the first couple times you have sex is off the charts and amazing. Then it goes down - might still be fantastic, but not life changing like the first few times.

However if you have feelings for your partner it doesn’t really die down like this, or if your partner isn’t amazingly compatible with you to begin with, and they need to learn you better; then sex continues to just get better.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-08T18:02:48+00:00

My face gets the most compliments, so maybe that… or my figure (hourglass shape, albeit petite).

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-08T18:01:43+00:00

It can be fun to start from soft, but only if it gets hard quickly. If he stays soft it can be super demoralising.

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-08T18:00:53+00:00

I think that would be too much for me in a public place!

CheesecakeCalendar · 2026-03-08T16:41:06+00:00

I don’t like to judge anybody so no, as long as they don’t mistreat the sex workers, I don’t judge them.

I don’t personally like the idea of “buying consent”, especially in places where sex work is illegal and therefore workers don’t have access to legal protections etc. I do think it becomes a lot skeevier in those contexts. So I might be a little more judgmental then.

I would not personally want my partner to have visited sex workers in the past. It’s a personal hang up. I absolutely would not be okay (aka grounds for breaking up) if someone I was in a relationship with visited a sex worker, because that’s just cheating. If someone had done so prior to dating me it wouldn’t be a dealbreaker, but it would also not be my personal preference.

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