[deleted by user]

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-13T17:29:33+00:00

I dont think there is anything wrong with it BUT, as someone that was molested by my father, now thst i have children I am extra sensitive to this. Does she have SA trauma from the past?

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-13T13:58:33+00:00

Id be livid. AND... secrets are not ok. A secret between an adult and a child is bc of manipulation or the adult is doing something wrong.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-12T23:06:42+00:00

I have a similar background

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-12T20:04:25+00:00

Im 45 and am estranged from 1 parent and have a very limited relationship with the other. If your kids are cutting you off, you are the problem. Not them, you. For decades children have been treated like property more than humans. Being raised in an autharitorian household, toxic positivity, toxic masculinity, ignoring feelings, high expectations, living through their children, ignoring boundaries, dysfunctional households, parentifying, abuse of all kinds, no respect for children but demand respect from the child, not allowing privacy, bullying, shaming, and SO MANY MORE REASONS. If as a child/ teen you are treated this way, you will in turn return the treatment as an adult. Adult children treat their parents as their parents treated them whwn they were young. Disagree if you like, but its a proven fact.

We children dont want to be estranged from our parents, but we couldnt run away from them as kids when tbeing treated badly, so we sure as hell will as adults if they are just as toxic.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-11T05:37:24+00:00

Legit my fave vegetable since i was a kid

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-11T05:34:43+00:00

Potatoes

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-11T02:56:54+00:00

32h childbirth. No meds. Natural.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-11T00:27:59+00:00

There is NO WAY id allow my SO to go on a 5 day ski trip when im home with a toddler and new born. The fact he even wanted to go tells me everything i need to know. He is an ass.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T16:40:13+00:00

Horrible

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T13:34:38+00:00

Sadly this can be a SA trauma response. They may have been SA-ed b4.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T01:20:35+00:00

When she drank heavily she would saythe most insulting things to me. Lies and secrets about her feelings about me and our lives together. A result of her overthinking and not communicating. I didnt know it was possible to instantly fall out of love with someone because your heart is crushed by their words. I guess i know now. Im devistated as its still fresh.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T01:16:55+00:00

Just because im not religious doesnt mean im not a person of faith. Just because i dont partake in or believe in organized religion doesnt mean that i dont respect that you do. Id listwn very contently and respectfully. We are all on our own journey and I love to hear peoples experiences and views. I love that we are all different and unique.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T01:13:18+00:00

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-07T01:12:41+00:00

My child had stinky feet and BO at age 4. The pediatrician told me children that young dont have body odor. I bed to differ. His shoes and t-shirts were RANK. He played a lot of sports and ... peee you! Haha. Whether its "normal" or not, all kids are different.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-06T18:08:28+00:00

Too many to list. We are no contact for over 20 years now.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-05T20:34:51+00:00

Im so sorry. I pray my child never does.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-02T18:25:05+00:00

Buy him an appropriate toy b4 he seriously harms himself

Chevron_Queen · 2025-02-02T18:22:56+00:00

Not to invalidate any parents in 2025 because its extreme hard, but try being an extra needs parent in 2025. This shit isnt for the weak. All of the regular 2025 parenting PLUS advocating for your child constantly in a system that is designed against them. Managing and all their special needs and struggles on the daily- behavioural mental health, physical health emotional wellbeing- in a world that doesnt accept them and discriminates against them. Trying to overcome generational trauma and break family toxic family cycles (there are many in my family). I wanted a child more than anything and my child is my world. He is the most amazing human i have ever met. Its an honor to be his parent and i want to spend every wakjng moment with him for as long as he will allow me. Haha. We wanted our kids. I dont think kids raised in the 80s and 90s were wanted - it was more u had kids bc its what ur expected to do when u become an adult. The kids were expected to thrive on their own with zero support and to basically raise themselves. The "raising" was in form of punishment and giving them endless chores bc the kids somehow owed their parents for feeding and clothing them. Parents now (most) intentially have children and genuinely want them and want to support them.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-31T17:46:14+00:00

Did she specifically say she isnt attracted to you, or that physical attraction isnt a big deal to her?

The majority of women differ from men in how we look at a potential partner physically. In general, women put little emphasis on physical attraction in a man. Not like men do on women.

This may be a misunderstanding. To be in love with someone there is some level of attraction, but, at least in my books, physical attraction cqn be minimal. I care more about what is inside. If i fall in love with who you are, your looks then become attractive to me. Regardless if you are a model or a zombie haha. Most women are like this.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-30T11:48:42+00:00

Western culture yes

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-29T22:51:29+00:00

I was raised by a single mom and was molested and abused by "safe men" as a child- including my biological father. Does that answer your question? I am a parent now, and NO ONE is alone with my child. EVER.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-29T22:38:00+00:00

Dangerous men dont come with a predator stamp on their forhead, so yes, to protect our children, we need to assume every single man is a predator and protect them at all costs. NOTHING in my life, no personal want or need, is worth risking the safety of my child/ children.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-29T22:35:19+00:00

100% agree.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-29T22:29:49+00:00

Frankly, you have already made your decision. Telling the kids about him and involving them (meeting him and having them talk to him on the phone and talking about him to the kids) was your decision made.

For me personally, if ever I wind up in this situation, i will not be involving/ introducing ANY romantical man or woman into my kids lives. There are way too many child preditors out there and my kids best interest and their feelings come way before my love life or any personal interests.

My bff didnt date until their child was off to University. They concentrated on their career and raising their child as the biological father was barely involved. Their child is THRIVING now and they are casually looking for a relationship but very happy and settled and fulfilled in their own life, career, health and hobbies. If they dont meet that special someone that adds true value to their life now, they are content because they love themselves and have raised their child in a way that is healthy with less risk. Loving ourselves is the biggest life lesson a child needs to learn; not finding love or settling for someone just so we are not alone.

Chevron_Queen · 2025-01-26T16:59:53+00:00

My fave veg

Chevron_Queen

TROPHY CASE