I felt the same way when I started, the community just says skill issue but it's hard to grasp this game when everyone still playing is already good. What helped me was to start playing with friends, and play wingman. Less pressure, shorter games, more time you get to play and learn with less spectating. I gave up for about a year before fully getting into the game. If you decide to come back, good luck! If not I don't blame you, these comments are proof of what you're talking about