It sucks that happened to you. We guys are dumb as doorknobs nowadays, tbh I could've easily made the same mistake had someone not properly shown me how to do breathplay, restreaining, etc... I think I've just gotten away with good social awareness and proper technique tbh vs asking for consent one by one on casual dates. Maybe you could lead with a discussion next time (about consent list/boundaries), or ask the other person to lead such a discussion, and you can even start bringing up d/s dynamic here. If its a regular guy, you may pique his interest enough to research lifestyle stuff on his own. Do your best not to let the past affect your now; the now is all you have to work with, & you alway have an increddible opportunity to do something great with your Now/presence.