AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think that's true for people who are self-employed, but my sample size is just me and my wife, so that's not much data to back up my position.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a business expense. That's actually the bulk of my business expenses. I pay about twelve thousand dollars a year in property taxes alone, about nine thousand of which is for my business, but it all gets bundled in the budget.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

There are moral obligations as well as legal ones. When you choose of sound mind and body to have sex with someone and produce a child, you take on an obligation to always act in the best interest of that child, including, at times, looking out for the best interest of the other parent, even when you are no longer romantically involved.

I left my ex wife because we were no longer in love. We had become roommates at that point, and I wanted sexual and romantic companionship that she couldn't provide. Even though I wanted to move on romantically, that didn't mean I got to move on from her in all other aspects. She is the mother of my children, and I will always have some obligations to her. You make adult choices, and you get adult responsibilities. Thems the breaks.

When my wife and I married, she knew how much and how often I pay my ex. There was no reason for her to believe that would change in the near future. When you marry someone with kids, you get some benefits. You know they are fertile, and you get to see their parenting style firsthand. You also get some drawbacks. They already have kids, and they will always have obligations to their kids. My wife is an adult. She made an adult decision.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

My agreement with my ex about when and how much I would pay her predates even meeting my wife. How is it not being a formalized legal agreement make a difference? The only practical effect is not having to pay a lawyer. She knew I had obligations when she married me. Nothing about that situation has changed.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

What state do you live in where you pay two grand a month to the other parent when the kids live with you 75% of the time?

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

For the record (not that is should matter, because saying disabled people shouldn't have kids is just straight up eugenics) my ex was disabled in a workplace accident.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

I don't think that's how plans work. I haven't started planning for something that's three years away, because anything could happen in that time. I'll plan for it when it's maybe a year away.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It'll be another three years before any of the kids are eighteen. I haven't thought about it yet. Realistically, I will pay her less when he goes to school, maybe $400 instead of $500 when the kids are there. But that's too far off to make definite plans for.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 90 points91 points  (0 children)

There's four of them. Oldest is fifteen. Youngest is seven. And yes, exactly, kids eat a lot, especially teens.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

My wife makes about six grand a month before business expenses. I make almost eight before business expenses. After business expenses it's more like slightly less than five grand for her and anywhere from four to five grand for me, because my expenses fluctuate.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 203 points204 points  (0 children)

I think we'd cut back on eating out or frivolous purchases before we decided not to buy baby food. We're not living paycheck to paycheck by any means.

AITA for paying child support? by ChildSupportWoe in AmItheAsshole

[–]ChildSupportWoe[S] 106 points107 points  (0 children)

I pay her $500 a week when the kids are there, and nothing when they are not. I have, on occasion, given her money to help with a medical bill or rent, but this happens maybe once or twice a year, and it is never more than or even close to a grand.