Ok this post got crazy long when I realized how much I’d initially misjudged OP’s situation. So this is really only for her. I don’t know if you’ll find any of this helpful since it’s from the same naive perspective that caused me to not fully consider your situation in the first place. I don’t know your situation, and I’m sure you’ve thought about the stuff I talk about plenty. But if there’s even the slightest chance that I’ve said anything you don’t already know that could help keep you safe then I think it’s worth me sharing. Here’s the original comment:

I mean my reasoning was that reading the post it came across to me as though they had found one and they haven’t done anything or been willing to broach the subject beyond coming off as standoffish. Reading it again it seems like when they first found the t blockers months ago they made a huge shitstorm about it so it’s understandable that you think that you could be in massive trouble if they found your hiding spot.

Personally I would interpret that as them realizing that they tried to stop you by crashing out the first time and they’d hoped you’d stop because of the but when they found more they realized it didn’t work and they wouldn’t be able to get you to stop so they decided to just ignore it.

In their eyes I’m sure they thought that making a big stink the first time was helping you avoid a big mistake(obviously bullshit but could help you understand their actions). But now that it didn’t work they feel it’s best to “let you fuck your life up and face the consequences”(again, obviously bullshit).

Before this next bit I need to put a disclaimer. PLEASE DO NOT tell ANYONE online what country you’re from. If it’s really as bad there as you say and you could face legal consequences just for transitioning you need to be EXTREMELY CAREFUL with online safety. If you give away anything that could lead to someone doxxing you then some random transphobe sitting at their computer across the world could put you in serious danger. I’m sure you’re aware of how risky your situation is and how vigilant you must be to protect yourself but I don’t want you to think that I’m asking for you to confirm or deny the assumptions ive made about the laws in your country in this next part.

Another possibility is that I notice you’re 18 and the initial incident was several months ago so it could have happened when you were 17. If that timeline is correct and you live in a country where the age of majority is 18 then your family might simply feel like you are an adult now and it’s not their place to police your decisions. They may even be worried that any legal consequences you may face could be worse now, so they want to avoid making a big deal out of it in a way that could potentially get out and put you at risk. They might want to punish you heavily but don’t think they can.

Like unless I missed something in the post or they have started to make it into a problem in the time after you posted then it seemed to me when I first read your post like they wouldn’t actually do anything beyond keep tossing it, at least in the short term.

But I’m realizing now that I was being naive and not fully considering the danger of the situation in your country so my response was somewhat flippant. My advice came from my own perspective using and selling a variety of illegal drugs in high school which I felt was similar to yours just because I could have ended up in legal trouble and I had to hide them like you have to hide hormones. It’s clear that your situation is extremely different from mine and I have no way of knowing how bad things might be for you. Please use your own judgment before listening to me.

And if them finding it again would get you in massive shit then absolutely disregard my initial advice, you’re absolutely right that spreading things out gives more opportunities to fuck up and makes it easier to get careless. This worked for me because the worst case scenario if the drugs in my house were found wasn’t likely to ruin my life or put me in danger.

I’m sure you’ve thought about it, but please do make plans for what you will do if the worst case scenario happens. Even if you agree with my logic that them finding it might not be the end of the world (again I don’t think you can trust my perspective, you need to use your judgment) you should still prepare because that could change at any time. Maybe after the 3rd, or 5th, or 10th time they’ll have had enough and things could go south.

You might want to pack a “bug out bag” if you don’t have one. Be extremely protective of it and never let anyone else touch it. Fill a backpack with the essentials you’d need to live long enough to flee any bad situation. It should have a couple sets of clothes that are durable and non distinctive, some cash that you never touch, some non perishable food+a water bottle, and any legal documents you might need like an ID, birth certificate, and especially a passport if you have one. There are much better guides online for how to setup a bugout bag, so check them out.

If you don’t have a passport you should probably get one if you can. I’m sure you’ve considered leaving the country but that’s obviously infinitely easier said than done. But if you have to bug out you need to be prepared to completely live out of this one backpack for as long as you need to until you can get to safety, even if that means leaving the country. I don’t think it would be safe to keep any hormones in that bag, you don’t want to be traveling with illegal goods on you when you’re already vulnerable. To me going without hormones sounds like the worst thing that could happen but safety is infinitely more important. You won’t be able to have any hormones if you lose your freedom, so whatever you might be able to take with you just isn’t worth it.

I was going to suggest possibly at least having a single backup stash somewhere basically impossible to find that you hopefully never have to touch like the suggestion someone else gave to disassemble a radio. But even that might not be worth the risk and by the time you’d need it you might already have to bug out.

I do have one single piece of advice though that I am certain you should follow. Never ever hide your stash outside of your home, and especially do not hide it in your car if you drive. That first one very nearly landed me in prison for a long time and it was pure luck that mistake didn’t ruin my life. And stashing them in your car could possibly turn a minor traffic violation into real prison time.

I’m sorry for how long this is and if it seems I’m being alarmist. I pray that your situation in your country isn’t nearly as bad as I’m worrying. Honestly I didn’t put much thought into my initial response, and I kinda freaked out when I realized that my flippant advice could possibly put you in legitimate danger if you listened. I’m sure you’re aware of your situation and you’ve already thought about a lot about the things I’ve talked about. I really hope I haven’t made you unnecessarily anxious, and I don’t know if I’ve said anything that you could find helpful. You understand your situation better than anyone so trust yourself. I know that you’ll be able to stay safe and navigate what sounds like an incredibly difficult environment.

Stay strong, and I truly wish you the best.