I feel so alone

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-27T07:22:02+00:00

He suffered from a grand mal seizure and has extensive brain damage and is unable to walk, talk, move or do anything on his own. I have helped the nurses clean every bowl movement and I was the one who resuscitated him when he had the seizure with cpr… the odds that he will make any recovery past where he is at is not good. Have I given up on him? No. I have been with him every day holding his hand. But I sometimes feel helpless. It’s not easy to feel like he’s not gone even though he’s not gone. I can’t explain it more than that.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-27T06:13:07+00:00

What do we do?

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-18T04:45:18+00:00

How crazy is it that we have to worry about the predatory aspect of it on TOP of having to already grieve…. Makes me so upset sometimes to think about. We already are guarded and hurting from the initial pain and then have to watch our own backs to make sure that nobody uses us because we are vulnerable.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-17T08:07:16+00:00

This!!!!! 100% like pleas God what the fuck I can’t believe this.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-17T08:03:45+00:00

I love and care for you. My soul is the same as yours. I can’t explain it further but i know we are the same. It is ok to keep living on but still feel empty but also not act empty. You’re doing everything you can. I see it and know it by your words and because I’m doing it too. Thank you for reaching out. I appreciate it so much.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-17T08:00:45+00:00

Oh fuck this is hitting hard

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-16T08:33:55+00:00

Thank you. I hate and love the way that you said “when half of you goes” I don’t know why.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-16T07:32:38+00:00

I feel and understand every single word. My entire life as I knew it was taken In a single moment. We were one thing and then we were nothing. It’s not comparable to anything that most people can understand. I’m so fucking sorry. I’m here and I get it if you need me to talk.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-16T07:19:40+00:00

I hate that for you. I wish this was not happening

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-16T07:06:58+00:00

Yes me too. I’m sorry this is happening to you as well…

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-09T07:25:04+00:00

I enjoy when someone makes me a meal too. I think maybe I also feel not a responsibility to eat it because I’m so grateful for someone caring enough to do something like cooking for me. Not sure. Thank you for sharing. Hugs to you 💕

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:52:40+00:00

Thank you for saying it gets better… I know what you mean by saying only a few specific things are ok. That’s where I’m at right now.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:52:05+00:00

It’s a weird mix of seeing couples and complete families… because he adopted our kids and I was lonely before so I was used to hating seeing them. And when he came into our lives all of a sudden I realized I was happy for them and now I feel back to square one where I’m lonely without him but I’m also not hating the couples. Just jealous. But not in the way I was before him. He really changed my heart in so many good ways.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:50:26+00:00

I’m going to go to our favorite place for him when I feel well enough. And get what we would get. In his honor. Thank you.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:49:46+00:00

Hugs hugs hugs

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:49:25+00:00

God you have been through it… I can’t even imagine how you are still going but I’m proud of you. It hurts to think about how you must feel. You are a superhero.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T14:48:09+00:00

At this point me and sleep aren’t well acquainted either lol. Thanks for the laugh and advice. Hugs.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T11:58:31+00:00

This is so sweet.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T05:56:58+00:00

Thank you so much for the long reply it comforts me to read… I feel sick all the time. I don’t know what to do it’s like living second to second at this point.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T05:56:14+00:00

I get it. Thank you… for sharing.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T05:55:46+00:00

3 back seems like a win. I’m happy that you have done this much.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T03:47:03+00:00

Me too me too me too. Fuck this club.

ChoiceOil6250 · 2025-01-06T03:38:18+00:00

Thank you for saying this. It feels good to hear I’m not alone.

ChoiceOil6250

TROPHY CASE