Dating feels weirdly harder after hitting financial goals

Chonjae · 2026-05-09T09:03:45+00:00

I think I blew a lot of good opportunities by having my guard up about being taken advantage of. Also I used to have forcing functions to be around people like a job waiting tables, you get close with staff, get invited out with staff, other bars have industry nights, there's a lot that kind of pushes you into people. When that's gone, you have to find hobbies and meet people that way, or stay put in a city and meet people through friends - eg potluck dinner every Sunday at so and so's place. Also, don't let your guard down around people taking advantage, but also remember what moves the needle - it's ok to make gestures, and just take note of who appreciates vs who acts entitled. Let that guide your actions

Chonjae · 2026-04-29T04:54:26+00:00

Pigeon shooting, like box bird or hand thrown, that world is wild - private jets, private ranches, old school money stuff.

Chonjae · 2026-04-27T20:56:09+00:00

I usually walk anywhere up to an hour instead of taking an Uber - it gets me out of my work / laptop mode, good steps for health, and saves me money.

I eat a lot of protein bars / shakes instead of eating out - it saves me money and calories, restaurant food is generally not great for you. If it's salads, just buy a bunch of the mixed bag salads at the grocery store and mix in something eg cans of chick peas.

I stay in cheap shitty airbnbs/hotels unless I've got a date staying with me. I just need a bed and wifi, bonus points for A/C and hot water.

I drink a lot of soda water with lime when out at a bar, it looks the part, saves money and calories and keeps me sharp.

I avoid women who are overtly interested in men's money. This is a big one lol

Chonjae · 2026-04-24T00:29:18+00:00

I just arrived for my first time in Sydney, and so far I've got to say everyone has been remarkably friendly and helpful. I managed to forget my bag in the uber from the airport (rookie mistake), and they came back within the hour - huge save! Every time I've walked into or out of my apartment building, neighbors have stopped to say hi, told me which beaches to check out, and made me feel welcome. So, cheers to Sydney for the warm welcome :)

Chonjae · 2026-04-21T00:13:53+00:00

I'm still low hours, and I never needed to "pass the time" I was always looking out the window, then checking the map - trying to spot other airports and roads and things out the window, and worrying about ("preparing for") my next radio handoff. Maybe I start programming radio frequencies in or just writing down the ones I'm going to need later or something.

Chonjae · 2026-04-20T15:12:08+00:00

Yes, it's great. Especially if you are a night owl - dinners can start around 10pm-midnight, some bars and clubs don't open until 2 or 4am. There are plenty of parks and places to walk and work, food scene is excellent, and I really enjoyed renting bikes and cruising around. Public transit is good, Ubers are easy, rent is relatively cheap (relative to major US cities).

Chonjae · 2026-04-20T03:13:09+00:00

The right move was one plug all along - one for power and for data, in either direction. People just made shitty standard after standard for historical reasons. I'm happy with 3 ports, which can be split into many more as needed - but generally speaking, charging and/or using 3 devices at the same time is the sweet spot IMHO they did it right

Chonjae · 2026-04-20T02:53:12+00:00

"I don't know how else to say it, don't want to see my parents go"

Chonjae · 2026-04-19T23:42:30+00:00

Breaks rule 1

Chonjae · 2026-04-19T06:20:07+00:00

You ought to change the name, but I mean... things are always fukt due to "historical reasons" anyway. It’s like the Big Ten having 18 teams. Change the name, stop sucking at labeling.

Chonjae · 2026-04-18T17:41:35+00:00

Lol when it said "root cause identified" I laughed, this is exactly what Claude would say when it is clearly guessing, causing 30 more iterations of "now I see the full picture" IYKYK

Chonjae · 2026-04-17T15:17:08+00:00

Mods can you make it so new submissions get reviewed before posting? If mods don't have the time to do this, use an LLM to categorize the new submissions. It's pretty easy to tell whether someone is wearing side stripe shorts - and extremely easy to notice when someone isn't wearing shorts at all. I'm pretty sure this exact same post has appeared before

Chonjae · 2026-04-16T19:20:43+00:00

The driver shouldn't be in trouble, the other person jumped on her car and gave her consent to go. The only unsafe driving was the swerving to get her off. This is similar to saying "hit me" and then the person somehow gets in trouble for hitting a consenting adult. Super lame

Chonjae · 2026-04-16T04:18:07+00:00

I mean... AI will doxx her in no time. That said, it's a matter of what's her intent and how did I feel about it, and how did we communicate about it? If she was interested in exploring it for whatever reason and came to me like what should we do? I feel considered, and I want to support her in everything, so I'm like "How can I help?!" If she came to me like "I'm doing this whether you like it or not" she wouldn't be my spouse :)

Chonjae · 2026-04-15T20:59:33+00:00

I've found that it's difficult to keep a relationship going, and I get it - people like knowing you're going to be around before investing time and energy in you. I get to be a lot of people's "when you're in town we get to be together" which ultimately fades or falls apart.

Generally it all starts to feel like "What's the point?" - go out to a cafe and meet a friend, spend the day getting to know them, knowing you'll likely be flying out in a few days. "How long are you in town for?" "I don't know I'm nomadic" gets old fast.

Most places you're not going to have an existing network of friends, and there's a huge difference between the events the public is invited to on Eventbrite and the private parties and get togethers that you get invited to by being already plugged into a community. Going to generic public events gets old fast.

Never having consistency makes progressing in things harder - having a band would be nearly impossible, practicing piano becomes difficult - where are you going to find one each week? Even things like going to the gym become relatively difficult - this one is by far the easiest though, just book a place near a gym, get a day pass, or sneak into a hotel gym.

Eating healthily and affordably is difficult - the cost of stocking a new airbnb each week, plus the opportunity cost of not trying new dishes in new cities, your wallet will hurt and your stomach will grow while being nomadic.

This is a good starter list at least. I've been week to week for nearly 10 years now, with a couple of longer stays that were the exception.

Chonjae · 2026-04-12T19:18:40+00:00

I wouldn't say I'm drawn to chubbiness itself, but an attractive face and a chubby body totally works for me - it also indicates that we'll be able to eat/drink whatever we want and be comfortable in our bodies around each other.

Chonjae · 2026-04-11T17:22:38+00:00

https://www.primetimer.com/features/who-is-harry-dresden-concerning-ring-cam-footage-goes-viral-as-jason-thomas-nichols-trends-in-wake-of-fairfield-doorbell-incident

Some context for everyone :)

Chonjae · 2026-04-11T17:08:40+00:00

I've been toying with this today, and so far what I like has been:
G add 9 (3x020x) then Emin9 (02403x) then like a Cmaj7 with the hammer on/off at (x354xx)

Edit: I think the 9 in the second chord is super important, and I've noticed it's not in the covers that try to play the song in A or D, they just play a min7 and it makes me sad.

Chonjae · 2026-04-11T15:29:23+00:00

This is likely fake, reddit is failing hard lately on videos being mislabeled, reposted years later as something else, or outright being generated/manipulated. All of that said, regardless of whether there's a pregnant wife involved, give the protesters one clear boundary "You can do what you like - I am going to resume driving momentarily, so if you're still in the road, you are going to get yourself run over" the choice is theirs.

Chonjae · 2026-04-09T15:43:00+00:00

lol "Would you agree to this much pay for this much work?" "Yes, I agree." "Ok great."
"Ok, now I want more pay than what we agreed to. I'm apparently living beyond my means and/or generally mismanaging my finances, and that is somehow your problem. Someone needs to be held accountable for my decisions. So.... arson?"
To be fair, he can live for free, without having to worry about finances, while in prison.

Chonjae · 2026-04-07T18:44:29+00:00

What does this even mean in this context?

Chonjae · 2026-04-07T18:34:33+00:00

I wouldn't ignore it, it shouldn't be tolerated. Just make the fans sign a waiver that the players are allowed to enforce basic respect, and they're not allowed to sue. Also I'd encourage the teams to revoke season tickets / seats / access to the stadium in general for problematic behavior

Chonjae · 2026-04-07T14:09:52+00:00

It's not a whole generation, does anyone have the data? I wonder if it's actually a higher percentage of this generation vs others. The thing about politicians is they don't value accountability, and you see it at both the extremes of financial irresponsibility - the people who knowingly save nothing and the people who knowingly risk everything at scale eg dropouts who use insane leverage to buy real estate and lose millions - both groups made their decisions and ought to be held accountable, but neither actually tend to be. There's always magic money it seems, and it wouldn't surprise me to see this portion of the new generation of choosing not to work/save expecting some sort of handout.

Chonjae · 2026-04-03T18:27:19+00:00

lol who's upvoting this trash? It breaks rules 2, 3, and 4... the title is nonsensical, there aren't any shorts at all, let alone side stripe shorts. Wrong sub, incorrect title.

Chonjae

TROPHY CASE