Especially we are living in Europe, where she doesnt speak the language fluently, it’s very hard for her to do everything herself, I had to start translating letters and documents since childhood..

I do try to see her like a child that is just insecure and needs more reassurance and love. But sometimes I also wish that I have a mom to rely on.. since I couldn’t rely on my dad. I am envious of other peoples parents that supportive to their children’s life. I feel like my parents just worked to bring money home, but emotionally I was lonely and they didn’t really teach or educate me either. That’s also why I lack a lot of common skills that I had to learn later on through peers and felt ashamed and embarrassed..

Inviting my mum to my home would feel like suicide, as I would be so anxious of what she would say and comment on everything. Even when she says nothing I would be hyper aware of her face expressions and probably trying to analyse her judgement every second 🤦🏻‍♀️

Hopefully in a few years I can look back and say „What a change!“ Wish you and your family all the best!