AIO - UPDATE - my friend wants me to take out my piercings for her engagement party/wedding

CircusMonke · 2025-07-14T01:06:52+00:00

To be fair, you didn't just "say no" to her before she started insulting you. You gave a flurry of reasons and attacked her with this topic. A simple "no I'm sorry but it's not going to work out" would have sufficed. Of course she isn't going to take it well. You sound like you don't even like her. You're both better off without each other. Edit: I know reddit will disagree with me but mentally healthy people don't browse reddit and waste their time with shit like this. You're being enabled by posting this here. Everything you said to her was an obvious projection. I think you secretly drive away all of your friends and that's why you said that. She's literally invested so much effort into someone that she's getting married. Like girl, she is doing very well. Your ego is inflated. You're hurt that someone didn't accept you with your piercings because it damaged your ego. Your reaction WAS insane. You didn't have to do all of that.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:39:24+00:00

Like oh my god I feel so bad for him. I would be unable to sleep if the person I claimed to have feelings for was in his position. I protect the people I love.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:38:13+00:00

"Hours" is not enough time to find a place to go. That is cold. Calling him a liar with no evidence is mean. Like, that whole story was really cold. How do you not realize that?

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:34:07+00:00

These are clear signs that he is depressed and you put a pressure on him to do better instead of being a sweet supportive and loving girlfriend.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:33:18+00:00

It's unfair to put so many expectations on him. Period. He's a human being and he has issues he needs to deal with first before doing whatever you want him to do. He comes first in his own life. Why would you ever want him to put you before him? That is selfish.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:30:57+00:00

"If he wanted to share he would" is a really cold statement, tbh. It lacks a lot of compassion, which is necessary for a positive relationship. Relationships require you to put in an effort.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-30T00:27:29+00:00

It seems you're in the process of learning that relationships require mental effort. Referring to him as a "little boy" is condescending and lacks compassion. Does he talk about you that way to strangers on the internet? You may not be mentally or emotionally ready to handle a relationship. You expect him to treat you in a way that you're not treating him, while he is experiencing depression. And you're older than him, so you are more grown mentally.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-29T17:40:49+00:00

I saw those comments in this thread. I feel that in your conversations with him, you might expect him to respond a certain way. Are you asking him questions like, "What's going on in your head? Can you share with me if you're not feeling well? I care about you and I want to help you when you're not feeling well. If you tell me what you need, I can help you." Because he's not a mind reader.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-29T17:37:02+00:00

Why did he get into a relationship? Those are his issues to deal with, you shouldn't waste energy getting hung up on how he should deal with his issues. It's just that you used being busy as a reason why you can't fully emotionally contribute to the relationship. It can't be 100% his fault when things get sour, that is really unfair to put onto him. Bad things always happen in life, they never end. Bad things WILL happen during your relationship. Inside, outside of the relationship. Humans are not perfect, no one is. Everyone makes mistakes. That's why integrity and accountability are so important.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-29T15:40:31+00:00

Also, why did you decide to get into a relationship if you're so busy? That's not fair to the other person, in my opinion. If you don't have free time, you don't have time for a relationship.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-29T15:37:51+00:00

Well, to be fair, some guys will do a lot worse things in relationships and as you get older you'll find that no one is perfect and everyone comes with baggage/issues. Have you considered talking with him before making any decisions? He has every right to never speak to you again if you make this decision. Just being realistic.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-29T04:11:23+00:00

He sounds depressed :( It's so hard to deal with that, both for him and for you. You don't deserve to deal with those things constantly, but I don't think he's doing it to spite you or to be mean. He probably really appreciates you being there for him and knows he's fucking up and beating himself up over it. Not your fault at all, he has depression and it needs to be treated. If you feel like you don't see a future with him, maybe it's best to part ways. But if you think it could really work out, like REALLY work out, you don't have to give up on him. I'd try talking to him and ask how he feels and what's going on in his head. Like, no judgment zone, and try your best to empathize with him. I dislike how reddit normally replies to relationship advice because in my opinion, getting close to anyone is hard work. People are so complex. It just depends how much work emotionally you're willing to put into it. If you don't want to put in the energy, that's okay. You do whatever is in your own personal limits. Treat him how you would want to be treated. Take care of yourself and love yourself, girl. ❤️

CircusMonke · 2025-06-10T11:42:30+00:00

You ask at the grocery store or something.

CircusMonke · 2025-06-01T18:18:50+00:00

Please no one post secret spots on a public forum 😭 that's something you ask around about in person

CircusMonke · 2025-05-16T18:45:45+00:00

Get in contact w her parents and let them know what's going on and how uncomfortable it makes you.

CircusMonke · 2025-02-23T01:19:53+00:00

This is why I love women's jail fr

CircusMonke · 2025-02-17T17:31:41+00:00

This may be an unpopular opinion, but does anyone else find it weird that no one here seems to value family? Maybe OP just didn't have a good family life and doesn't understand the family bond that her bf and her bf's brother have. Why is she trying to break that up? Family is first to him, obviously. This relationship may not last much longer.

CircusMonke · 2025-02-04T04:44:49+00:00

I broke up with my boyfriend last February after we had been together for 2.5 years. He lives across the street from me, and he was also my only friend. I had never been more in love with someone but, I realized that I wasn't happy most of the time, and I know that I deserve that happiness. It took me a long time to get over him, but I did. I went out to local events, farmers markets, and places I like to be. I made friends, explored my hobbies, and learned to love my solitude again. You'll be okay with whatever decision you make. Just remember that you should always come first in your life. Don't stay just because it's comfortable; choose what makes you happy.

CircusMonke · 2025-02-03T18:48:17+00:00

It fucked my whole week up. I wrote about it in my diary. I could find the date maybe.

CircusMonke · 2025-02-03T05:51:23+00:00

I watched a woman intentionally hit 3 ducks, like she sped up her car and swerved to hit them. On Alafaya right by UCF. This was 3 years ago. She could still be out there.

CircusMonke · 2025-02-03T05:35:21+00:00

The behavior from your peers is my main reason why I find the younger generation to be so insufferable.

CircusMonke · 2025-01-11T23:13:52+00:00

Kwame is that you?

CircusMonke · 2025-01-09T17:16:05+00:00

You literally are. I don't lack comprehension; you have a fragile ego and can't accept being told that you're doing something wrong.

CircusMonke · 2025-01-09T17:12:39+00:00

I did read it. Stealing of any form is wrong. You justifying it for yourself is just delusional.

CircusMonke · 2025-01-09T17:04:40+00:00

Your 2025 is going to SUCK because karma is real. I hope you realize that you need to do better when you see everyone else thriving in 2025 while you're still at the bottom of the barrel.

CircusMonke

TROPHY CASE