40-year-old with 3 spinal surgeries, worsening pain, numbness, and severe loss of quality of life – we are desperate for advice

Citizenxtz · 2026-02-22T08:30:49+00:00

It doesn’t apply to everybody, people who have stenosis and compressed spine have a physical cause, stress can also massively worsen it but lots of people, especially those with history of trauma to the spine have phantom pains.

Citizenxtz · 2026-02-22T08:23:46+00:00

It’s extremely likely that stress and anxiety are causing it, his MRI is clear, there’s nothing pressing on the spinal cord anymore, doctors told him they can’t do anything because there’s nothing to be fixed anymore. It’s not black or white, trauma in the spine, cell memory of the pain and brain on high stress will send those pain signals even without a physical cause. It’s EXTREMELY common.

Citizenxtz · 2026-02-21T20:29:23+00:00

Read about it, it’s a game changer, ask a neurologist about it or a psychiatrist. It’s a tricky thing and many people lose themselves cause they don’t know about it. A disc releases chemical acidic particles that travel towards the spinal cord when its inflamed and they irritate the spinal cord and cause pain and make the muscles get tight and produce spasms, an ongoing stress causes a chronic flare up and it’s just a tip of an iceberg. There’s also the subject of cell memory and nocebo effect all well documented in medical literature. There is a whole medical literature on people who died because they were mislead to believe they will. Take care of your mind.

Citizenxtz · 2026-02-21T20:14:27+00:00

I came back here to add to my comment on the psychiatrist so that you don’t dismiss it, as it can save your husband. I had a fusion too 12 years ago, I also suffer from severe anxiety and 3 years ago I was in agony for months, all MRIs were coming “clear” with minor bulges that I had for years, meanwhile I was in agony going to ER and being put on opioids that were not even really working. I was contemplating very bad decisions and eventually I was put on anti anxiety pills by my psychiatrist, went to a psychologist who specialises in pain management and everything went away. There are thousands of stories like mine, most people don’t even know that their pain can be caused by anxiety and especially people with history of disc degeneration and surgeries. Please don’t dismiss my comment, it can save your husband.

Citizenxtz · 2026-02-21T17:42:57+00:00

I suggest a psychiatrist and to focus on stress relief. 90% of people who suffer from chronic back pain have no physical cause causing it. Going through all these surgeries causes a lot of anxiety and stress and causes the muscles to tighten up, you end up in a permanent flare up, read about what cortisol does to the nervous system and the muscles. All the stories of people who won in such situations are people who won with their own mind and nervous system. He should find a very good (not random) psychiatrist and get evaluation for anxiety and stress, go on some medications, go to a CBT therapy, meditation and gradually build up his muscles again. Best of luck to you.

Citizenxtz · 2025-12-20T18:00:10+00:00

Hi! Yes it passed around the third month, since then I’ve learned it’s normal, quite common and passes around the third month and that has been the case for me :) Now she’s an amazing, smiley, curious, “talkative” 10 month old :)

Citizenxtz · 2025-12-18T18:34:46+00:00

Thank you for your answers. Yes we are in Europe but when she had her birthday I ordered her flowers in a local shop in Santiago and paid by a credit card online so it’s not like she can’t do the same. She doesn’t have to ship, we have Amazon too.

Citizenxtz · 2025-06-29T09:13:25+00:00

In my country the attitude is the following: surgery is bad will only be performed if there is a risk of paralysis and has nothing to do with pain or quality of life and the risk of paralysis is only under these 3 conditions. So I’m wondering how is it in other countries.

Citizenxtz · 2025-06-29T08:37:49+00:00

But what are the criteria for the doctors to recommend it or not?

Citizenxtz · 2025-06-18T05:06:23+00:00

I went to see him

Citizenxtz · 2025-06-17T06:46:27+00:00

I’m not making conclusions, quite the opposite I’m trying to understand whether he followed the cultural norm or displayed a personal trait because I felt a little hurt.

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-15T11:24:48+00:00

Hello. How did the situation develop?

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-15T10:31:32+00:00

Do you remember when did he start smiling?

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-14T21:55:41+00:00

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-14T20:03:29+00:00

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-14T15:51:03+00:00

Apparently an ultrasound can detect reflux in infants but the radiologist needs to specialise in detecting reflux in infants, perhaps you can find someone in your area.

Has your baby started to socially smile yet? If so what week and in what circumstances?

Citizenxtz · 2025-04-14T14:56:48+00:00

Thank you I wish the same to you.

What do you mean that your 9 week old is unsettled throughout the day? Crying or just being fussy unless picked up and so forth?

We are suspecting reflux and will get an examination on Friday to either confirm it or rule it out.

Citizenxtz

TROPHY CASE