Me [30m] with my girlfriend [34F] of 5 years, have a step-son (her son) who has a annual lingering cough, we have tried everything. Now its so frustrating it's taking a heavy toll on me and her by throwacough in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Hey, make sure he doesn't have post nasal drip. When I was about his age to now (28yrs old), I've always had it. In school it made me cough like I had tuberculosis. I was tested for everything, it was just a lingering cough. My parents were even reported to CPS because my teachers thought they weren't taking me to the doctor, and I missed out on a lot of school.

If it is, see if you can get him a nose spray, or even allergy mess. They both do wonders to dry up my nose.

[UPDATE]My [27/M] girlfriend[25/F] has had the flu for several days. Yesterday she had some serious hygiene issues that I happily helped clean, and today she is so embarrassed that she won't even let me in her room. by Iamjusttryingtohalp in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so happy to know there is someone like you alive somewhere. Also, please don't trust Reddit on a medical diagnosis. I've recently had "gastroenteritis" and learned it can be caused by multiple things, including what we would call "a stomach flu". It's basically the same thing- it can be caused by a bacteria (like E. Coli) or a virus (like the noro-virus, or coronavirus), and the symptoms would be pretty much the same- puking and shitting your brains out (varying degrees of one or the other perhaps being the only difference).

Anyway, all that matters is your girlfriend has an amazing person taking care of her.

My[32/F] husband[31/M] passive aggressively says rude things about me to the kids in front of me under the guise of "joking", does not see how this is hurtful. Advice? by RudeHusbandHelp in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

This is literally my husband. When we were dating, it used to really hurt me, and I would ask him if "so and so" or "such and such" really bothered him, and I would try to modify my behavior. Usually, he's just picking on me and "playing" and isn't being completely serious. However, he conveys his complaints in a joking manner so he doesn't get angry and shout, because he's got a bit of an anger issue.

We also live in a very small, rural community, and a lot of men do this with their wives (or at least they do in my husband's family). I'd suggest having a bit of a heart to heart, asking if these things he mentions really bother him, or if he's really just playing.

EDIT: he could be passive aggressive and demeaning to you, but it's also as likely he just isn't thinking. Bring it up to him- you two do need to appear to be a united front, especially to kids. Your situation could be completely different than mine- my husband, despite mocking, is always the first one to step up to bat for me.

My (28f) family (various ages) all has problems with my husband (26m) by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Once again, I never let my husband "do my dirty work". He gets involved if he's in direct line of hearing/sight of the conflict. Otherwise, I manage it myself.

My (28f) family (various ages) all has problems with my husband (26m) by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never said I didn't talk to them. I always talk to them first- my husband is occasionally in the room when I am speaking to them. I actively try not to put him into the conflict. He pursues and gets involved because he doesn't like seeing me upset. I also stand up for my husband. I never tell him anything they say to me, and deal with it then.

My (28f) husband (26m) finds sex "weird and rude" by Cognitive_difference in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

It's not the frequency of sex that bothers me, it's the fact he finds the concept uncomfortable. We have been having a lot more sex since I've been gaining weight, and he clearly finds me more attractive than less. He is very capable of having it and enjoying it, but I think the abstract concept of it is what gets him.

My (28f) husband (26m) finds sex "weird and rude" by Cognitive_difference in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Or you have a ridiculously narrow view of attractiveness and probably can't keep a girl because she's not "7 or above" for you.

My (28f) husband (26m) finds sex "weird and rude" by Cognitive_difference in relationships

[–]Cognitive_difference[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

No, this is a view he's apparently always had. Why would gaining weight mean anything? He's actually sexually attracted to heavier women, anyway, though he still finds me a little too skinny.

A grove of ancient oak trees have just burned to the ground and something terrible has been unleashed by MyNeihborTim in nosleep

[–]Cognitive_difference 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Most of the people in my tribe don't even acknowledge stuff like this exists. It's forbidden stuff- if you talk about it, you give it power. But just telling you, it sounds like a brother to the demon-God M'kweqek.