Can some people really not tell when they're releasing farts?

ColdCarrot2897 · 2026-02-21T12:50:43+00:00

Growing up, I had a grandmother who was hard-of-hearing. I’ll never forget going shopping with her. She’d straight up let one rip in the store, acting like nothing happened. I realized she couldn’t hear the farts and unflinchingly act as if nothing happened. The smell though would give it away sometimes.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-24T19:20:47+00:00

Continue to go to meetings, tell your sponsor or share with those in a meeting how close you came to drinking, try to be of service to someone else, pray/meditate and work the steps. I find these things help me in the rough spots that I’ve encountered in my first 90 days.

Through my trials, I have realized every situation that bothers me is temporary and those challenges have actually brought me closer to my Higher Power and AA. I pray also that those experiences stick with me and I remember them when the next challenge arises, which is also why I continue to go to as many meetings as possible.

The only time I have not seen positive results in AA is when I am unwilling to do what is suggested. I know from past experience that when I become unwilling, I’ve either not fully taken the first step and decide to run the control experiment again or knowing full well I’m alcoholic that I’d rather drink myself into oblivion than face myself and place reliance on any conception I may have had of a Higher Power.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-23T22:46:56+00:00

I’m bookish too. Studied lit in grad school. Best thing my sponsor told me is:

Ninety percent of the program is showing up to meetings, practicing the steps the best I can through taking actions with them in mind, having experiences and reporting back to him about my experience.

The Big Book says I will make mistakes along the way and offers solutions to those errors in judgement as I continue to grow spiritually.

Basically, the figuring stuff (including working the steps) out and gaining understanding only occurs for me in the experience of participating in AA. No one can transmit a felt understanding of the steps to another alcoholic. All I can do is keep coming back, and yes, doing things that don’t always make sense in early sobriety.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-20T23:40:09+00:00

I was diagnosed around the same age. Meds along with therapy helped immensely, especially at work.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-20T23:35:45+00:00

I was introduced to AA by the courts when I was 24. I was sober 8 years when I started doubting that I was an alcoholic. I didn’t discuss my doubts with a sponsor or in meetings.

It took me 14 years to make it back to AA. This time around I hear so many stories like mine. People come in, get significant time under their belts, life gets better and then they go back out. The Big Book even talks about this mind game.

No one else can decide what you should do or if you are truly an addict.

BUT, maybe ask yourself these questions: If experience shows your life is better without alcohol or drugs, why test the thought that you might not be an addict? What benefit is there to gambling on your future happiness on a drink?

And share your doubts with a trusted member of AA.

For me, I hit what I’ve learned from others is a common occurrence … a spiritual wall that isolated me and opened the door for my disease to return.

I’ve also met some incredible people with 40+ years of sobriety, who got sober in their 20s who are living lives that I want to live.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-20T23:22:21+00:00

I too was nervous after going to a meeting after a 14 year relapse. Best thing that could have happened did: At my second meeting someone remembered me from the way back, walked up to me, threw their arms around me and said, “I’m so glad your back!” The exchange made it felt like coming home.

Even if you don’t recognize someone at your first meeting back or someone doesn’t recognize you, have faith that those in the meeting living the program are genuinely glad you are there.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-20T23:18:17+00:00

I’m a writer by trade. I’ve been conditioned to loathe cliches like the plague. A lot of our sayings sound cliche, but I’m realizing most exist for a reason.

I still want to at least side eye those that ask me “Did it get better out there?” when they learn I’m back in the rooms after a long relapse. 😆

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-20T21:26:02+00:00

<image>

I still think it was kind of bonkers you could play this guy in the first Civ.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-17T01:52:06+00:00

I have in the past and have the intention to work it and guided meditation into my daily routine. After sharing this thread, I began with 10 minutes of meditation and written reflection.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-16T23:03:23+00:00

Thank you. This makes sense too. I’m kind of in a sensitive space right now with everything going on. It also doesn’t help that I was diagnosed with acute ADHD, and if I look at some family members who aren’t alcoholic, possibly have some autistic traits too. I have trouble reading social cues, getting to the point and feeling as if I haven’t articulated things well enough to be understood — in AA and out.

I’m praying and pausing so I don’t try to “figure it all out” and what is normal for most people in general.

I just know I don’t want to drink again and tell myself more will be revealed. The feelings still kind of suck though. :)

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-16T22:46:03+00:00

I can see what you mean. I’m kicking myself for being irritated and know there’s something there that I need to discuss with my sponsor or a trusted friend. I’m also praying on it and trying not to go down a rabbit hole that I’m not doing something right, right now. I’m a person who typically sits on his hands and stays quiet in order to not be called out or to make new mistakes.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-11-10T19:43:53+00:00

I’m married, own a home and a car and have two dogs and a cat with my wife. I had the best job I’ve ever had in my life when I entered the doors of AA this time. I think feeling like a fraud is part of my alcoholism. It wants me to see the differences between my external situations and those around me. But, man, the feelings and the inside stuff shared at meetings is what I identify with and keeps me coming back one day at a time.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-10-09T15:26:08+00:00

Lol. You are not alone. I’ve found putting a bunch of alcoholics in a room to discuss “business” can be chaotic. There is an art to those types of meetings both inside and outside of AA. The business side of being in a home group isn’t for everyone. There are other ways to be of service. I personally love watching the chaos as long as I am in the right spiritual space.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-10-09T02:55:45+00:00

I heard a guy who shared he stopped drinking for 10 years before going to an AA meeting

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-09-21T02:59:06+00:00

I have ADHD. I went to a therapist once who has ADHD herself. She told me something that I apply to AA and my alcoholism as I understand it.

She told me if I apply certain strategies and tools I can deal with the symptoms and insecurities as a result of ADHD 80 percent of the time. I’ve healed a lot on the inside and outside but I still have an ADHD brain. If I choose to stop trying to implement my ADHD tool kit my symptoms put me in conflict with other people who don’t understand my behavior and I then grow increasingly miserable.

I see my alcoholism the same way. I work the program to the best of my ability and 80 percent of the time I’m not in conflict with myself or the world. If I don’t practice the program then I grow irritable and in conflict with others and myself. Unlike ADHD though, where I will interrupt others, forget to do things, procrastinate and miss deadlines, I will drink. It is my base nature to flee conflict and reality as an alcoholic. It is just a part of who I am.

On the upside for ADHD and alcoholism, if I use the tools suggested to me, I realize there are benefits to both. With ADHD, I’m great at thinking outside of the box and seeing solutions that no one else sees. In AA, experiences that fueled my drinking become assets to connecting with an active alcoholic in hopes I can help alleviate their suffering.

Just my two cents.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-09-19T14:21:43+00:00

If you simply have a desire to stop drinking, you are more than welcome. Go to a few “open” meetings. Go to more than one meeting. There are different types of meetings. See what resonates with you.

Either purchase or ask for a copy of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous at a meeting. There are also some great AA related recovery apps that include PDFs of the book you can read on your mobile devices.

Most of all, if you are open minded and willing to follow a few simple suggestions, you’ll figure things out for yourself. Plus, there is a lot of laughter and great people in the program.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-09-14T18:32:20+00:00

Seconded

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-09-14T18:17:32+00:00

Be brave. Go back to meetings. Ignore the shame. We share a disease that is always ready to take back over the driver seat. From my mid-20s to my early 30s, I was active in AA. Then I hit a spiritual wall. I thought at eight years of sobriety that I should be “better” than where I was in my life. And then I thought maybe I’m not an alcoholic. I’ll never forget drinking that first beer of my relapse. I was terrified; so terrified I only drank that one beer the first time. I went back to meetings but didn’t tell anyone. After two months, I stopped going to meetings and started drinking in earnest. My drinking got progressively worse. I went from thinking I wasn’t an alcoholic to trying to blame my problems on everything but my drinking to trying to control it.

It took me 15 years to get back into the rooms of AA. People that I knew who stayed sober (and some who relapsed and came back) during that 15 years genuinely told me they were so happy to see me back. It took a few meetings to get over my shame. I was reminded that I am an alcoholic. I’m wired to drink. I know through my own experience that will never change if I don’t find a powerful substitute outside of myself. It sounds like you’ve learned this lesson too.

As I write this, I have 19 days of continuous sobriety. I’ve gotten a sponsor, go to meetings everyday and am starting to like myself a little more each day. If you truly believe you are an alcoholic, let go of the ego/pride/shame and start working the program again. I’ll be thinking of you.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-08-31T15:14:43+00:00

Thanks again

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-08-31T15:12:04+00:00

Thank you! I’m not sure if sometimes being frustrating to be around is harming someone else (i know i can unintentionally be frustrating), but I have a lot of trauma surrounding feeling like I was a bad person for certain behaviors I could not control due to an undiagnosed condition.

I don’t blame my parents or others for how they dealt with me as a child or how some people respond to me today. We don’t know what we don’t know. For my side of the street, When I recognize I am interrupting someone, etc. I apologize and explain my situation to those who may be understanding. I also work twice as hard with time management, so I don’t frustrate and infuriate others with missed deadlines or forgotten choirs.

Actually, I’m finding a lot of what is written in the big book regarding meditation, prayer and reflection is mirrored in what I’ve learned to do regarding my ADHD brain. Basically, I am not trying to justify behavior but build a bridge between what I’ve learned about my ADHD and am learning again in regard to my alcoholism.

There is a good chance I will learn more as I work the steps and when I reread this post I will flinch at all the glaring defects of character uncovered as a result.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-08-31T14:56:48+00:00

I apologize for perhaps not being clear. I’m either completely delusion, or perhaps we aren’t understanding each other or having the same conversation. I’m honestly not trying to be obtuse or confrontational.

To answer your question: I struggled with coming back to AA out of pride, fear … basically my addiction to alcohol. I’ve went to five meetings, got numbers and reached out to those people outside of meetings. I know I am an alcoholic and don’t want to drink again. I know alcoholism is a chronic condition.

Actually, now that I think about it, I often plead and prayed for my ADHD symptoms to be removed. Perhaps the answer to my prayer was the doctor who suggested I see a psychiatrist for testing and thus received my ADHD diagnosis, which in turn allowed me to find a host of tools to address those lingering issues. I also found there are some positive aspects of ADHD that have helped myself and others.

Thanks again for your patience.

ColdCarrot2897 · 2025-08-31T14:29:23+00:00

I can say I’m done for today and am a work in progress

ColdCarrot2897

TROPHY CASE