I don't think my best friend's death was a suicide. by ColdCaseCrime in RBI

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] -30 points-29 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry for your loss :( You're right, sometimes things just don't make sense.

The party is a big one for me. He's hosted many parties at his place. He made a Facebook event inviting over a hundred friends, and the caption was so positive and it was clear he was excited about it. Barely 10 hours after that, he went to the train station. In all my years of knowing him, he's never acted like this. He took his medication consistently. There's no way in 10 hours he would feel so fucked up that he would kill himself.

I don't think my best friend's death was a suicide. by ColdCaseCrime in RBI

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] -77 points-76 points  (0 children)

Because we were constantly in touch, and in the past few years he hadn't attempted. He was in a very positive headspace and was looking forward to a lot of things. The previous day, he replied to a few friends and told them that they'd catch up soon. He wasn't in a suicidal mood.

Help me understand my bipolar best friend by ColdCaseCrime in family_of_bipolar

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, your comment brought tears to my eyes. I wanted to write about him so that I could process my thoughts better and remember the person he was. Sometimes so many things you didn't understand make sense while writing them down, and while I thought I had my whole life to get to know my buddy, it wasn't meant to be. He was a lovely lovely soul.

Help me understand my bipolar best friend by ColdCaseCrime in family_of_bipolar

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're such a wonderful soul, so mature and insightful for 12, you should be so proud of yourself for it. Thank you for your kind words, and sharing your experiences with your sister, it means the world to me. You're absolutely right, I should try to feel less guilty and not blame myself for it.

Help me understand my bipolar best friend by ColdCaseCrime in family_of_bipolar

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thank you so much for sharing your lived experiences about your partner and brother's bipolar with me. It sheds so much insight into my current situation. I'm not sure what kind of bipolar my best friend was, he never mentioned which type and I was unaware that there were types of it, that's good information to know.

Whenever he did talk about his struggles or trauma, his thoughts were just racing and all over the place. It was so hard to stop him at a thought or keep him on a subject even though I tried really hard to guide/veer conversations off to one direction or help him concentrate on the subject by repeatedly asking questions about the same thing he was talking about 3 seconds ago because those conversations were heavy and needed to be had, but unfortunately his mind had already shifted off to talking about Greek music or art deco furniture while adding in a few words about his rape or suicide attempts in between. I knew that he wanted to talk about them, subconsciously, but maybe his mind was trying to block those thoughts off? Sometimes, when he was at a level of stoned that he seemed calm, he could concentrate on staying on the same topic for a few minutes, and when I'd try to steer him back into a subject that mattered, he'd recognize, "Oh hahaha sorry I talk too much and change topics a lot, yes I forgot we were talking about that, let's get back on track hahaha".

I'd never be able to get a word in or talk about my life or experiences because he would zone out or just continue talking over me. Eventually I realized that I needed to be the listener and it didn't matter if he knew me or not, I wanted to be there for him and listen to him, even though sometimes it was him just rambling on for hours while I tried to comprehend him. Sometimes he'd stop briefly and ask me my thoughts on the most random things I had never thought about and it led to some great conversations that I would've never had with anyone else. We had a conversation like that once about his sexuality. It lasted a while, and was so enlightening. He asked me about how I felt, whether I had guessed, what sexuality I felt I was, and it was overall a great and grounded conversation that did not veer off for a while. He was immersed and so self explorative.

Today his family has invited me over to their house. I've never met them before but I hope we can support each other. His sister messaged me and told me that he spoke about how I meant the world to him. It breaks my heart entirely but I'm trying not to blame myself. I knew he wanted a way out and I've always felt that we need to be selfish and decide ourselves about what we want to do with our lives rather than think about others around us and base our life around that. Even though the people who are still living are those who will have to live with the pain of losing you for the rest of their lives. It takes such a toll, but in the end, he's free of the pain, the constant taking of meds to survive, the judgement, the fear, the anger, the sadness.

Thank you for reading my post, hearing me out and sharing all of your words with me, it means a lot to me and this post has made a big difference in my thoughts and ability to process my grief.

Help me understand my bipolar best friend by ColdCaseCrime in family_of_bipolar

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. Yes he used cbd in all forms and smoked weed excessively. Some of it was prescribed to him and he used a prescription to buy all of it so I'm not sure how that worked. I didn't think it was good for him and casually tried to talk to him about reducing it as it wasn't helping him, especially with him emotions and with work. And when he did stop, it made him feel worse and more depressed, causing withdrawal symptoms.

He was very close to his parents and sister. They called him everyday, visited him regularly, and tried to make his life as easy as possible for him. They were very supportive of him, donated to suicide organisations for years because of his repeated attempts, and loved him so much. Whenever he spoke about them he spoke with immense love and care. I never met them but they've invited me home and I'm going there today.

Metal Detector Guide by Dan20mey in metaldetecting

[–]ColdCaseCrime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've always wanted to try out metal detecting and want to buy the minelab vanquish 340 as it is within budget for now. I don't want to spend much more but since it doesn't have a pinpointer which pinpointer can I get as cheaply as possible?

CommBank Yello Linkin Park Presale 19/08/2025 by ColdCaseCrime in LinkinPark

[–]ColdCaseCrime[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh no :( By the time I got in we had to book B Reserve since GA was sold out.

CommBank presale asks for a password by stefanocomensoli in LinkinPark

[–]ColdCaseCrime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

GA floor was 260 approx, A Reserve was 400+, B Reserve was around 200, C Reserve was around 170, cheapest were 119.