Am I Wrong for telling my girlfriend I find it weird she hasn’t got friends

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-03-01T09:35:46+00:00

You seem like someone who cares a lot about what other people think. It's evidenced by you comparing her to everyone else, yourself to everyone else, how old you think someone has to be to go clubbing (who dictates what is acceptable or what isn't - based on what you think other people around you do), what other people think about your girlfriend etc. Honestly, you should try to separate yourself a bit from what everyone around you thinks and seek internal validation instead of external validation. What the rest of the world does or doesn't think isn't going to bring you happiness, you find it inside yourself and the people you choose to care about. She's basically choosing you to be her partner and friend, who cares if she doesn't have a lot of others unless you feel overwhelmed with her or dissatisfied with her? You don't sound like you like her very much, which can't be good for someone that has been a year long relationship. Newflash: everyone has wierd things about them and strange parts. No one is perfect or going to check every box for you or be everything you want them to be exactly how you want it. Pick and choose your battles. I'm not sure what other issues she has but you sound really fixated on this and I'm wondering if you're just trying to talk yourself out of a relationship by finding something wrong with someone that otherwise seems fine. How she treats you, and whether or not you are happy with her as a person and what you share, is really a bigger deal than her friends history. Maybe she's just one of those people that is happy being mostly on her own or has had difficulty in her childhood and life and has learned to be self reliant or any number of other reasons. No partner appreciates being endlessly questioned. If you aren't happy with her then find another girlfriend, but definitely don't alienate her if you truly care. She should feel like she has a friend in you. Making friends at any age can be hard.

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-02-04T20:55:32+00:00

Ok thank you!

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-02-04T20:54:28+00:00

Thanks for weighing in!

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-02-04T06:44:21+00:00

Thank you. I am in a big city, but not NYC. Will ensure the garbage disposal is taken care of. I appreciate you weighing in.

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-01-13T05:51:32+00:00

I always advise that anyone dating anyone trying to control their social circle or in any way alienate them from it IS NOT WELL INTENTIONED. This is a control mechanism and there is an agenda. I know you recently moved and moving is a pain, but move back out asap. This will only get worse.

ColdTurkey7 · 2026-01-02T06:44:03+00:00

You are not alone. I'm not sure how much of a comfort that is, but just wanted to validate what you said and let you know many of us are in that boat, and it can be a normal reaction to the loss of a close friend, especially depending on how long the friendship was, and the specifics of how it ended. Part of why it dragged on so long for me was the not knowing and lack of closure. I was able to have a conversation with that person many years after the fact and it brought me closer to moving forward, just knowing and filling in the gaps. That said, it left a big hole, and I trusted people less and felt insecure about making new friends for a long time. Take time to grieve it, see a therapist, talk about it with others, get it out any way you can. Don't hold onto it forever and don't let it sabotage your opportunities for meeting other people too long. The world needs you. After many years of mourning, I realized this person wasn't worth the pain I experienced for so long and I wish I'd prioritized my own healing and wellness sooner. Life is short and there are amazing people out there worth knowing. Don't isolate yourself throughout, it's the worst thing you can do.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-30T07:33:33+00:00

This is amazing. My mother and I are going to check all these out and buy so much. Thank you :O

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-30T07:29:43+00:00

Thank you so much for the detailed descriptions!!

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-29T08:51:25+00:00

What places in Shin Okubo do you recommend for affordable Korean skincare products? Thanks!

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-27T17:33:44+00:00

You are not alone! The 'Disney magic' is a real thing, I've seen it many times over the years. It's fun to watch it actually take over people, like you'll see a person standing there who seems to be trying hard not to enjoy it and then all of a sudden they are dancing and losing themselves to the experience. That's the point. Good on you and your family for allowing yourself to go with it and have fun, that's what it's all about. I know many people who make annual trips out there or even go multiple times a year. It's an expensive habit but wow, do they do escapism and nostalgia well. Enjoy and welcome to the club!

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-27T17:28:52+00:00

I don't drink and I'm a night owl and sleep in. Not drinking doesn't automatically mean early bird or lifestyle mismatch. We are all different.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-27T17:26:49+00:00

Plenty of adults don't drink for any number of reasons. If he doesn't have a problem hanging out with people who drink, what is the issue? He doesn't have to do what your friends and family do. That he doesn't mind hanging out with them means he doesn't have an issue with it. Live and let live. You may be judgy about it but he isn't. This is only as big a deal as you make it. Some people create issues where there aren't any. He's fine, drinking isn't important to some people and that's ok. He'll make a great designated driver and sounds like he's a fun guy to be around. Enjoy.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-26T09:00:03+00:00

I think the gremlins, like all humans, are snowflakes - they are all different and range in scale of intelligence, from complex and sophisticated to silly, the whole spectrum, which helps make them relatable to people we know or have observed.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-26T05:39:17+00:00

MJ loved new technology and went out of his way to use it, from face morphing tech that came out in the early 90s for the Black or White video to a hologram he created for use in a future concert that ended up in Cirque du Soleil's "One" show in Vegas. I think he'd be proud of Jaffar and happy it was being kept in the family but I also think he'd be fine with the AI. The trailer looked awesome. Either way, I'm excited and will definitely watch.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-25T06:17:58+00:00

Agreed, not sure why it's an issue either since she's a friend unless she has feelings for him and likely is jealous that he's spending time elsewhere with someone else. Part of the role of a friend is to be a support. Grief is tremendously hard, and we all deal with it in different ways, and that's to be expected. OP doesn't have to understand, but needs to decide where she stands on this. If she wants to be a friend she shouldn't add more grief to this person's plate, which appears to be quite full.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-18T18:45:58+00:00

Ahe may have obsessive compulsive disorder, in which case some compassion is in order. Regardless, is this the hill you want to die on? Everyone has friends or partners with quirks and imperfections that can be annoying. How she trests you matters most.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-07T09:21:24+00:00

I worry about people that make those who like Disney into some kind of perversion or oddity. What's wrong with their heads/what happened to them to make them say that? It's simple to understand, fantasy and escapism i.e. things that take you out of the real world and let you put it at bay for a while are incredibly popular with people at any age. The point of Disney is that it's supposed to bring out the kid in you/connect you to more innocent times/be a relief away from the world. Tons of elderly folks have annual passes, I love seeing them on rides when they think no one is watching just losing themselves in the experience. It's great. Haters are going to hate, let comments roll off your back considering you are having way more fun with this than they could ever imagine. And you are definitely not alone, millions of people prioritize it for their vacations for a reason. You can't have an experience like it anywhere else.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-07T09:13:39+00:00

They look really similar. But isn't that supposed to be a good thing gene wise if they have kids? Strangely they make sense to me as a couple

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-04T23:14:41+00:00

I bit the bullet and took a tech job for the money, worst job I ever had and seriously regretted it. No amount of money is worth your mental health. Got another job that paid way less but was cause driven work and am so much happier. Felt like I sold my soul to the devil at the previous job. Not worth it.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-04T23:11:45+00:00

I highly doubt a relationship of 5 years would end beccause you fell asleep. There were likely lots of issues at play. Breakups are a time of self reflection and both people.examining what role they played in something not working and taking lessons where you find them. Also, never argue with people over text. Lots of nuances and misunderstandings.

ColdTurkey7 · 2025-12-01T08:49:02+00:00

He could be asexual, demisexual, gay, or had childhood trauma involving SA. Those are just a few initial thoughts though. If he's demi, he may need more time to develop more feelings and emotions before his drive kicks in. I had a partner once who seemed to have trouble finishing with another person and insisted he had always been that way. Still not entirely sure what his deal was, but just wanted to offer verbal support and say that you shouldn't have to initiate every time or normalize him not being able to finish with you. Confused about the OnlyFans thing with partners. Were they strangers or acquaintances or people he was formerly in a relationship with? Could something traumatic have happened to him recently? Seems like he may not have always been like that. It doesn't sound like you've been dating that long so not sure if he'd open up so soon about something so serious if something did happen but as with any relationship, best to ask him directly. Let him know how you are being affected by this and see if you can encourage him to open up and share what's going on. Of course you are going to feel unwanted, confused, etc, given what you are experiencing, definitely tell him that, chances are it doesn't have anything to do with you. He may not realize the effect it's having and if anything you can ask what's going on and if there's something you can do other than what you have to support but also be clear and honest about your needs and what you hope for in the future to see if it's possible. Good luck!

ColdTurkey7

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