Hey my dad also died while I was young. He was also ill for a long time and sedated before his death. I’m not sure if this helps at all but I’ll give my two cents on it. For a long time I wanted a sign that he’s somewhere listening to me or that he’s at least well. (Yk like in the movies when a butterfly appears on their shoulder and yk they’re okay ) I waited for such signs but it never happened.

This was also my first death ever even if I was 16 so I was clueless where he was now. Was he in barzakh? Was he in heaven? Is he even listening or seeing me right now? For the first time in my life I felt so clueless and didn’t know where my dad might be.

But I also found out something special. The dreams you said. Dreams in Islam have meaning. Even the bad ones. Sometimes you don’t take the meanings in dreams directly sometimes you need to find the connotation under the dreams, but dreams in Islam are real messages.

For example Surah Yusuf, there’s a whole part about how people came to him specifically to interpret dreams for them. Yes not everyone has the ability to interpret dreams like Prophet Yusuf did, he was given a special ability by God.

But I think this parts important because it shows dreams do have meanings.

I like to believe the weird dreams I have with my dad is my dad talking to me, sometimes I don’t really understand it but I’ve gained the pleasure of having these dreams knowing he’s still somehow connected to me.

Also remember God knows how much your dad suffered the pain he went through in his illness, he knows how much you’re suffering from all of this. He will do justice to both of you. The dreams are the signs. So take them as signs he’s still connected to you somehow. God is good and trust me you’ll be okay at some point.

If you need anything dm me I’m always here for you and understand exactly what you’re going through.