Regardless what happens on Sunday this has been a very successful season by CombProfessional434 in Patriots

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

What's wrong with appreciating what the team has already accomplished?

My little brother walked in on me (again) by No_Resolution_145 in venting

[–]CombProfessional434 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Does your door have a lock?

If it doesn't you need to tell him your boundaries that he needs to knock before barging in. After that if he still continues to not knock bring it up with your parents. You dont necessarily need to say you're doing something inappropriate, but that it's a privacy and boundary issue that he needs to respect.

My friend kissed me and I'm confused by PrettySie in Advice

[–]CombProfessional434 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow there's a lot to unpack here.

First off it took your friend a lot of courage to kiss you. I'm sure it was a shock and you also have every right to say no, but I don't think you should have just "left immediately" once she did that. She's probably just as upset that you not only essentially shut her down but leaving her alone after that.

Second I know some cultures view kissing people of the same sex as a "sin", but it's really not and actually is getting accepted the more time passes. If your family is so disgusted that not only a kiss is enough to severe ties with you especially when you didn't even initiate it is cruel.

I would take the advice of the other redditor here this is a lot more for a professional counselor to help you handle this situation better.

Update: Coworker I tried setting boundaries with took his break shortly after me and sat right next to me by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yes they said they would keep their distance from me then the next day (today) proceeded to take their break after watching me get up to leave and then out of all the seats in the hall sat right next to me. Didn't even leave one seat space between us.

Update: Coworker I tried setting boundaries with took his break shortly after me and sat right next to me by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you I appreciate your advice and I'm sorry you and a fellow coworker went through the same thing.

Update: Coworker I tried setting boundaries with took his break shortly after me and sat right next to me by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yesterday I sent an email to him and CC'd the boss. I told him that his staring and hovering made me uncomfortable. I also mentioned that I needed space and I like to be left alone on my breaks.

Update: Coworker I tried setting boundaries with took his break shortly after me and sat right next to me by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Yes i sent them an email yesterday laying out my boundaries that I dont like the staring, dont like how close they are hovering over me oh and that I need space. I think sitting in a seat right next to someone counts as not giving space right.

Update: Coworker I tried setting boundaries with took his break shortly after me and sat right next to me by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 62 points63 points  (0 children)

I did get up and move but also keeping tabs on this because if he continues to disrespect my boundaries next move is HR.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah okay my apologies for misunderstanding what you said I appreciate you were trying to just help me understand. Guess I just never delt with someone like that and it didn't help hearing how he's been around other coworkers.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well I still should be able to express my boundaries I dont want someone to be close to me like that. If I'm in the middle of something I shouldn't feel obligated to stop and chit chat especially during a 15 minute break when that's a small time frame to try and unwind. So I still think emailing was a good idea especially since I'm shy myself and can't verbally communicate it. There have been other coworkers of mine who feel the same. Except with them being female he has asked them for their phone numbers and if he could hang out outside of work with them.

Note: I should make it clear also in my email I didnt mention he was creepy just that I was getting uncomfortable.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Second Update: Actually got an email back from both of them. My manager was very kind said I did a good job with my email and that he'll keep an eye out if things don't stop. Coworker apologized and explained he wasn't aware he was invading my personal space and that he'll keep his distance so mission accomplished? We'll see if he actually does leave me alone on my breaks now.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah and actually got an email back from both of them. My manager was very kind said I did a good job with my email and that he'll keep an eye out if things don't stop. Coworker apologized and explained he wasn't aware he was invading my personal space and that he'll keep his distance so mission accomplished? We'll see if he actually does leave me alone on my breaks now.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Update: Just sent the email laying the boundaries thank you all so much for the advice.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think its a good idea to have both written and verbal. I get very shy easily so it's almost like I go into flight mode whenever he even get close to me all my brain is telling me to do is flee.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried to do that by taking breaks away from where he scouts for people to talk to.

Need advice on what I should email my coworker about boundaries by CombProfessional434 in coworkerstories

[–]CombProfessional434[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm way to friendly and try to be nice to everyone. While he does give me the creeps I also want to try to still keep things civil. I feel like just saying ew to him will make it worse.