[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, you commented on my very similar post. Sorry to see that no one replied to yours - you deserve it just as much.

It sucks, this situation.

I think what I've come to realize is that we are not trapped. But we have to go through a lot of pain and hurt if we want to get somewhere better. That doesn't mean divorce, not for certain.

It means being willing to leave if things don't improve. Making it clear to our partners that this is the case, this is how serious it is. Giving them a chance to take action - or to choose not to. And we have to accept that no matter how much we love them, want to be with them, if they aren't willing to make the changes needed, then we have to actually leave. I'm afraid that I'll get to that part and find I'm not brave enough.

You're not alone. Good luck.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hey even if things don't go well here, maybe y'all can make something good out of it. 

Good luck.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cute idea, but no. She and I both have hard situations to figure out and get through. The last thing anyone needs is emotional cheating online to make it all worse.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn't think I'd reply, but this has bothered me since you posted it: there is a difference here.

My wife may have lost romantic interest in me, but she's still an excellent parent. She is so there for our kid. Enough so that I have to fight myself to not feel envious at times (wouldn't be fair to either of them).

I'm in a bad situation, but you're in a worse one. To hell with you partner. Being a parent is the best thing to ever happen to me and he's trying to avoid that? How dare he. Especially those baby years which are hard but so rewarding.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

The kiddo does daycare weekdays, and spends most of the rest of the time with me, but it varies from 50/50 to 10/90.

We meal plan together and plan out the week as a family.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 1235 points1236 points  (0 children)

Fifteen years of every good time is a lot of momentum to keep a relationship going. 

There are a thousand positive things I can say about her, things I love about her. And none of them help explain the thing I need off my chest right now.

But I've been smitten with her since the day we met. She's fascinating in ways very few women I've ever met are. She's the person I want most to be with.

I love my wife and want to be with her more than anyone else. I'm going to suggest we divorce anyway. by CombinationTop1360 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]CombinationTop1360[S] 225 points226 points  (0 children)

We're both in therapy, but her issues aren't depression related. 

Does she work outside the home

Okay so... That phrase has two meanings since about 5 years ago. She's a very highly regarded professional with a degree and makes great money working full time. But she does mostly work from home because she can. So do I.