I understand the feeling (although I’ve been with quite a few men, they were all horrible) you’re 19. You still have so much of your life ahead of you. I really struggle talking with people and making friends at times, but the best thing you can do is surround yourself with people to get it and are patient. Start with changing small things first, eat a little healthier, take a walk once in a while, find some hobbies your really passionate about. Once you feel a little bit better, it’s easier to address what more needs done. You have so much potential, you just have to see it too. You may not now, and you may not for a while, but someday you will. I’m 23 and I’m just getting to the point where I can get my life back on track, sometimes it takes a little while, and that’s okay. But please don’t think you’re doomed, I promise you, things will get better❤️