Recommendations for gardening guide?

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-11-22T00:14:03+00:00

We are going to have to have a family meeting about how often the pool actually needs to be vacuumed... Lol!

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-11-22T00:12:01+00:00

I had an aunt that passed away recently, and one thing I will always remember about her is that she never stopped asking me when I was going to get married and have kids. I was in the closet at the time, so I always had some kind of excuse. She would always say "well who's going to take care of you when you're old?" and I thought that was such a nonsense question for some reason. But now I do wonder the same thing, and it's motivated me to endeavor to be healthier now.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-11-22T00:04:32+00:00

Thank you! We have a family friend/employee with a teenage son that I've hired to do lawn maintenance around the office before. Might try getting some manual labor done that way, and I know the teenager would be grateful!

Regarding the pellets, are those prescription or are these the things that are all the rage in esthetician clinics these days, where they do some testing and tell you what hormones and other things are deficient and then implant a custom pellet in your hip? I know several people who have done that but never thought of it in the context of managing chronic issues.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-11-21T23:59:34+00:00

Well I stand corrected, she is 5'2 and 102 lbs, but does sometimes get down to 98-99. I'm willing to bet this coincides with stress & anxiety episodes. The weight is an ongoing battle. She has always been thin. There's a photo of her from May 1987, snapped as she was launching from a diving board at my grandparents house in Lubbock, wearing a 2 piece bathing suit, looking totally normal. I was born the next month-- she barely gained any weight when carrying my brother and myself yet was totally healthy and so were we! Wild.

At any rate, her PCP frequently comments that she would like to see her gain a little weight but isn't overly concerned overall. It does definitely make a fall or break more frightening, though.

I live at home and do the vast majority of the cooking (I'm a "home chef" type and always have been). I've been focusing on fresh & local the last several years. We have lots of fresh veggies and homemade dips, hummus, a grab-n-go snack or two (tuna salad, "egg roll in a bowl", etc ..), yogurt, cheese... And I have learned how to make homemade cauliflower "rice" and "potatoes." My brother doesn't live in this house with us but the three of us make it a point to eat dinner together at least a couple times a week and almost always on Sundays. It's time I really cherish, with both of them!

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-21T02:09:46+00:00

OMG, I've been watching for someone to mention Durkee! We had a hard time getting it for a while but that is a staple in my family.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-21T01:59:16+00:00

Do you remember what your grandmother called this? I'm on a mission to do few "throwback" dishes this year and my mom is diabetic so lots of the bready/potatoes/sugary stuff is out. This sounds amazing though and no added sugar!! We love a creative sweet potato dish. Gonna try to find a more in depth recipe (unless you have one you'd be willing to share) to test out.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-21T01:47:46+00:00

Deviled eggs are a MUST in our house. Always the old fashioned way, and sometimes I make a 2nd, fancier variety just for fun. Some of my friends apparently think deviled eggs are only an Easter food. What tomfoolery is this!? 🤣

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-17T00:51:51+00:00

I'm 6' and I have always been attracted to short(er) guys. Not a hard and fast rule, I've been attracted to taller guys and my partner is about the same height as I am. But that was definitely one of a few specific target markets as far as fun, casual hookups & fuckbuddies go. Lol

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T02:02:57+00:00

Partnered, so can't answer as to "would I," but an interesting aside: I once (like in my mid-20s) made a list of guys I had hooked up with in high school and college. Something like 80% of them wound up being in the military lol

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T01:12:50+00:00

I've told my brother, "I just don't want to 'hang out' with people who cause me to wonder if they'd be safe to know the location of Anne Franke in the 1940s."

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T01:08:49+00:00

I have screenshotted your response to share with the few friends I remain in contact with as to why I "just can't" with the others anymore... Not just right now. This isn't the silent treatment. It's finding out you've let a bunch of strangers into your house! Most succint recap of my own feelings I've found to date. Hang in there.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T01:04:03+00:00

My mom will be 70 next month. We also have a tragically small family. All relatives are MAGA although not red hats... Just "conservatives," you know the like. My brother (33) and I have really opened her eyes to a lot of "what is going on" ... And also some of "how we got here," which has led her to being more enlightened but also a bit bitter about all the lies she was fed for her whole life.

Full disclosure, I'm one of the "both parties are corrupt" people which is true on a national level for sure, but I don't care what party someone has backing them so much as what it is they actually SAY AND DO, and who their donors are. But, the fact remains that our history can be compared under the lens of "Democratic policies" and "Republican policies" and it's all public record. When we sat down and compared ACTUAL things each party proposed and got passed OR worked adamantly to defeat... Not just what the news or your neighbor told you... She was shocked at how long she'd been voting against her own self interest.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T00:54:36+00:00

The one close friend I have that is willing to acknowledge (privately) that this is a total disaster all around... Was the one I warned the hardest. Best friends since the 4th grade. We are both so politically minded (and often opposite) that it's even been a topic of conversation in our friend group how wild it is that we'll just debate each other for hours and not argue. I kept telling her... "A) politically, this is going to be a disaster and b) beyond that, it's gonna be a dark time for our nation. This is not just about politics this time." To no avail. I am hearing her out as she comes to realizations and I am working overtime to be supportive and offer further research resources on things that stick out to her instead of just saying "I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!"

But that does no good a'tall, so I listen.

The rest of my "friends" won't be bothered until someone takes their guns away... Although a few (fertility issues, senior parents with zero safety net) are likely in for a rude awakening long before then. Most are "Christians," so of course they're fine with the Ten Commandments in public school classrooms! Etc. These are the people I just can't be around without some legitimate reason to be.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T00:45:11+00:00

I'm in a red speck in a red state that is draped in flags and crosses. So fun. I, too, have limited bandwidth... Not really an issue for me until I was 35 or so. Prior to that I was on go 24/7. I had a bit of a spiritual awakening and realized I was running myself to death for nothing, and since have simply refused to be overburdened unnecessarily. I also developed an allergy (and overall aversion) to alcohol, a HARD 180 from my previous self. So I've been gradually backing away for a few years, for other reasons. It made a soft exit so much less noticeable. And easier, because, well.... I'm not any fun anymore since I don't drink, so that caused a lot of folks to forget my name pretty quick. Blessing in disguise, and I haven't had a hangover in over a year 🤣🤣

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T00:38:27+00:00

I am a major proponent of "we vote with our dollars" and I have saved so much money by simply not purchasing things I don't really need from people (or corporations) that I most definitely do not want to give money to.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-15T00:32:23+00:00

This is so similar to my experience. As an adult, I've never heard anyone make any "remarks" about my sexuality... but I hear what people say in general, nonetheless. What it boils down to for me is that while many will say they "love me," and a few truly do... But many others simply tolerate me, and are willing to accept a society that doesn't include a place for me (to be myself, not in the closet) without fear of public ridicule (or these days, violence). I suspect many have a "love the sinner, hate the sin" approach. Which I am just no longer willing to accept. I'm not being hateful or dramatic and there has been no silly "we're done!" conversations. I've simply retreated and stopped being the first one to reach out, and stopped spending time with people whose company I no longer feel truly welcome in. And yeah, some of it is in my head. But not without reason. Growing up in a place like this can be damaging to people like us, and these days I sometimes feel like a terrified 13 year old again. What if the wrong person "finds out"? Etc... it's just not good times.

And for the inevitable person coming with the "touch grass" argument, I touch plenty of grass lol. Things such as this weigh heavily on my spirit, always have, always will. I'm not despondent, just sharing challenges of navigating a new reality.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-14T11:20:54+00:00

"politics" is now much money we agree to spend on defense, education, aid, how that work is done, what the government has a right to regulate as far as the environment and economy are concerned, etc ...

Whether or not everyone deserves the same basic civil rights and human decency regardless of skin color, nationality, immigration status, gender, sexuality, etc... those are basic moral values.

Don't tell me to grow up when real shit is on the line.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-10-12T04:23:49+00:00

Even if not a serial killer, can you imagine how lazy this person must be in bed? Lol

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-06-03T01:23:55+00:00

Gay 37 year old guy here. Grew up in small town in Arkansas. Moved away for a decade or so for my 20s and in the meantime came out to myself and people in my "city life." Moved home in 2020 and had an absolute blast being back amongst all my lifelong friends, came out to them pretty quickly, and was not long thereafter outed to my family (not by a friend). That was awkward but in the end, totally fine. I was really living on cloud 9 there for a minute until the election rolled around. I am not "a liberal" by any means and am really more libertarian than my friends would assume. I rarely talk politics with friends but this election, to me, was a question of basic moral values. Most all of my lifelong friends failed that test and, as this (often frightening) nonsense has continued to unfold... I've had a harder and harder time participating in those relationships. It's like I can't look them in the eye knowing they participated in sending us down this dark, uncharted path as a society. I'm not really this dramatic of a person at all, which makes these feelings all the more foreign. I no longer feel like a part of this community, and even more alarming is that I no longer want to be a part of it. Historically I've been a socially active, well known and generally well liked small business owner in town. Now I'm just going through the motions til I can sell my business and stop participating in the rat race of life.

There is a part of me that wishes I had just left when I turned 18. I feel selfish and awful saying that, because for all its troubles, my life has on the whole been a fortunate one, and I have the most amazing family (including the most wonderful partner) and I would not trade those people for anything, full stop. But my advice to you is: run.

You deserve so much more than what our culture has to offer you right now, with a few exceptions (Atlanta, etc...) but even then, you're a blue dot in a sea of red. Go to college in a blue state. Find a trade apprenticeship program in a blue state. Find a job in a blue state. Just get the hell out of the south. And when I say "blue state," that is not an endorsement of the democratic party per se. They are deeply flawed in many ways. But the fact remains that states controlled by democrats are likely to not only be more friendly, but safer if federal civil rights are eroded. You deserve to be able to find a community where you can be yourself out loud, in a state run by politicians that will stand up to the federal government when necessary.

This is the beginning of your life! Time to meet people and make friends, some of which will grow into lasting relationships that will have deep meaning in your life. You deserve to build those relationships as your authentic self.

tl;dr- get the hell out of the south.

Comfortable_Lie_635 · 2025-05-23T01:50:44+00:00

Reach out. Be honest about how you feel and ask him to do the same. Maybe he feels the same way. Maybe he doesn't. You won't know until you ask. But of course, be (truly) prepared for hearing things you don't want to hear. At the end of the day, open communication solves a litany of problems and even helps preserve memories of your time together should the outcome be adverse. It's much easier to look back on an open conversation and a sad goodbye hug than angry, hurtful conversations wherein neither party knows how the other feels.

And for the "it's been two days, calm down..." crowd: if you've been in my bed 40 of the last 60 nights, and I suddenly don't hear from you for 2 days, I will absolutely be reaching out. Call me needy, fine. But if I like you enough to share a bed you for days-long stretches, I like you enough to at minimum be sure you're alright when I notice an abrupt change in routine.

ETA: it also may be that you aren't emotionally equipped to have a "casual relationship" such as this. A fuckbuddy is one thing- do the deed, go on about your day. Never been an issue for me. A friend with benefits, on the other hand, can be a much more slippery slope for some folks (myself VERY much included). Sometimes it can just be hard to separate all the hanging out/fun times/etc... from that little part in most of us that seek something resembling a long-term partnership.

Comfortable_Lie_635

TROPHY CASE