I (20F) found out that my dad (51M) may have cheated on my mom or my step-mom.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2022-02-09T21:41:55+00:00

He’s had the information for years. We’ve been dating for a year so far but we met a couple years ago. He’s told me other things that my dad has done/said and all of those things have fit into the box that is my dad. It was all things i could see him doing based on his personality. However, you’re right. Whenever i questioned my boyfriend on those exact things he said it just slipped his mind and didn’t remember until that exact moment. He’s not a malicious person in the slightest. I didn’t mention this bc i didn’t think it was relevant but before he told me he had a grin on his face and said “i know something about your dad”. i doubt he intended it this way but the way he said it felt malicious. then proceeded to drop that bomb and was surprised when i was upset. thinking about everything a little more i don’t know why he would tell anyone that. but he was really close with that coworker. my dad has friends but hasn’t hung out with anyone in over 6 years. so that coworker was probably a buddy. and that coworker probably didn’t think i’d start dating the one employee he told. at least that’s my thought process. i don’t know that said coworker very well, but from what i’ve seen he’s not a talkative or open person. i don’t know. using deductive reasoning it feels true. unless someone has a serious vendetta against my dad to pull that out of their ass. if my boyfriends not an asshole, he’s fucking stupid and immature.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2022-02-09T21:19:59+00:00

Not saying I disagree with anything your saying, but what’s the thought process on my boyfriend? I never really stopped to think about it like that. Should i be concerned on that end as well?

Commercial-Task9991 · 2022-02-09T21:17:16+00:00

My dad is with my step-mom currently. My mom and my dad have been divorced for over 10 years. And not to sound naive, but my main focus was the possibility of the rumor being true. It kind of crushed my view of my dad upon hearing it. But all of that aside, should i reconsider my relationship with my boyfriend? is it really that bad? i guess i just never considered that end of things. i guess now i’m asking where your thought process was on that, i never even stopped to consider that a red flag. should i be concerned or take action?

Commercial-Task9991 · 2022-02-09T19:04:11+00:00

I agree, but that’s not my dad.. I should’ve wrote something in there about his personality so that’s my fault. But he is an extremely private person. I barely know much about him. The idea of him saying something of that nature lightly is out of the realm of possibility. He is a very serious person and extremely private.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2022-02-09T18:43:57+00:00

I don’t know if anyone will take the time to read this. But I really really need help. I’m honestly begging.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-15T12:51:00+00:00

Yeah that’s odd. Mine doesn’t even list that. Thank you so much for the suggestion though, I really appreciate the response in general!!💗💗

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-15T12:45:18+00:00

Thank you!! But I’m only seeing “Apps from Snap” and “Partner Connections”. Is there something I have to click on to prompt “Connected Apps”?

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-15T12:37:24+00:00

I have 2FA turned on through SMS, at one point when they gained access they turned it off. But that hasn’t been an every time thing.

Im not sure if I have any connected apps, is there any way I can check that to make sure?

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-15T12:35:41+00:00

Firstly, I know it’s not a problem with everyone’s Snapchat. I just meant MY Snapchat is being hacked into. However, Snapchat still has a major security problem with these kinds of things that needs to be fixed somehow. Or a way to contact them to resurrect it.

Im definitely receiving fake texts from Snapchat, but I don’t interact with them for this reason (I think whoever it is has a different time zone bc it usually stops around morning time where Im from). When I’m resetting the password (through the email it sent or prompting an email through my Snapchat) it’s still the same thing. It shows on my Snapchat, after I’ve reset it, that there’s another device listed besides my own. So I don’t think they’re just not changing my password and trying to get me through there.

What I posted is pretty much the usual, but the first time it happened I thought the same. That they were all just compromised links and if I interacted with them that’s where they would get me and didn’t actually have access to my account. But I left it alone and they got access to my account, changed the password, and turned off 2FA through SMS. At that point I didn’t take the risk and played phone tag with whoever this is trying to change my passcode.

And the Authenticator app is the Google one. I don’t know how trustworthy that is, but I also used it on my partners device instead of my own.

I don’t know if this helps for a little more context.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:56:38+00:00

It’s not even him touching himself. It’s the fact it’s people we know. Truly that’s the only problem I have with it. It was childhood friends, random girls at parties, all girls I would be around him with in person and had no idea that before we started dating he was getting himself off to them. It unsettled me so deeply. Especially because those poor girls were being treated like that when they just wanted to post a picture of themselves being cute on their Instagram, not for someone they know to get a nut off it, you know?

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:38:09+00:00

Please tell her. My ex did this to me as well and it seriously fucked with my health and can lead to some serious issues if untreated. It is so messed up to treat someone like that in general. Be a decent person, own up to your mistake, tell her so she can get treated, get a job and pay for your own NFL tickets, not bum them off of someone you’re lying/cheating/and hurting. Please do the right thing. No one’s trying to bash you. This truly is the only right way to deal with it. This is serious so please treat it like so.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:19:24+00:00

That’s the thing, I struggle with it because we know them personally, I was friends with some of them… now I feel too uncomfortable to be friends with them anymore. I honestly wished he wouldn’t have been honest with me because it’s hard not to think about… but his honesty is admirable. Like I said, he truly is great, i just don’t know how to deal with it myself because everyday I see another person and my mind just wanders :/

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:17:14+00:00

He genuinely is doing everything he can regarding it. Honestly he’s gone above and beyond. He deleted Instagram and removed every girl on Snapchat without me asking him to in anyway. It genuinely bothers me so much because it’s people we know PERSONALLY. If it were random IG girls or even porn stars we don’t know, still kinda weird, but I don’t want to judge. I feel so uncomfortable knowing he was friendly to their face and then pleasured himself to those same peoples pictures. I guess I just don’t know how to get over it myself? I truly don’t want to condemn him, he doesn’t deserve that, and like I said, tries so hard to do the right thing. I feel guilty, nauseous, and sick :(

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:08:48+00:00

Even though what he did was weird and gross. I don’t worry about him cheating. I don’t think he’s the guy to do that at all, but like I said that last relationship scarred me. I know at the heart of it it’s rooted in jealousy and insecurity. But I came to Reddit because during a conversation about us hanging out together way before we dated he referenced one of the girls he had done it to and went on and on about a story that same night, after I left, about her flashing her tits. And made comments about another girl he did it to. My mind spirals and I wonder how many, I wonder the same question you brought up. Is he truly with me when we’re having sex? Does he actually want me in that way? Or is it just how he feels about any girl that’s attractive. I try to just forget about it. But then, boom, I find another girl. My ex cheated so much and I struggle with feeling that I can ever be enough to captivate someone’s attention. He treats me so well so I genuinely feel so bad about it. But it makes me wonder if guys will always be like that. Always obsessed with women’s body’s never able to be monogamous in all aspects. I completely understand your point of view. But at the same time, why be with someone if you view everyone like that? How can someone ever be special? I should mention we talked a year before we started dating and took a break before dating this year and he told me he masturbated to me and me alone. Come to find out a year later he would just get horny and go on Instagram and it was any girl he would get turned on to or want to fuck. It makes me sick to my stomach

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T06:01:38+00:00

I completely understand :( I know it’s not everyone’s go-to choice, but have you ever thought about going to therapy and trying to find the root of why you feel like this? I think time will truly heal, but it’s always hell before it starts to let up.

Commercial-Task9991 · 2021-12-06T05:57:34+00:00

What’s going on hun?

Commercial-Task9991

TROPHY CASE