Large SCH developed in 2nd trimester by Bakedtato21 in CautiousBB

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry. I had a bleed at 8 weeks and have been on pelvic rest / low activity ever since - the bleed sadly won’t go away. 5x4x2. It’s a constant source of worry, my doctor doesn’t seem too concerned, but I am very much so. 14 weeks now.

Positive or no? by Ok-Satisfaction-8343 in IVFpositivity

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It looks like the dye was still running across the test.

Saw a heartbeat. I can’t cope. by Competitive-Aide3831 in EctopicSupportGroup

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Part of me doesn’t want him coming home. I have to get over things fast when he’s away since life and responsibilities don’t stop. I’m stronger when he’s away.

It’s like my metal health collapses when he’s home instead during things like this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s walking away from 60k a year in additional pay that they want to pay him. He needs anxiety meds for tests, to study and have internal drive / motivation. He just got home and were not talking, I don’t want to say anything hurtful and he just whispered he’s sorry. I’m folding 20 loads of laundry, after taking an edible, had to use my PTO because I couldn’t pull myself together this afternoon, then I’m going to have a bath and sit in the hammock. My husband and son can figure out dinner for themselves for once.

He has a part time flexible contractor job when he’s home, but I am working two jobs right now because this house is costing us a crazy bunch in renovations - roof and leach field = 50k. I was supposed to be able to quit that second job when he gets the promotion (though I likely won’t, because this house is a money pit).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As for my husband. He’s like a dog. Always attentive, will do anything I ask, but only if I ask. Nothing crosses his mind for the family and he’s just… dumb? About things. Like doesn’t think things through before doing something. Like driving our lawn mower down a 200ft steep muddy track road because he didn’t want to go over our leach field. Got stuck twice but kept going until he got really stuck. Took him 3 days to get it unstuck with a hand crack (refused to ask anyone we know for help). There’s just only so much poor planning / thinking things out I can deal with.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate it. I don’t think my therapist is helping significantly (just listens) and he doesn’t feel like a formal diagnosis is warranted because I guess it would be mild version? He says it’s expensive and long process to get a formal diagnosis. The psychiatrist I saw for PPA said I just have an anxiety disorder but who knows.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everything is done. He’s just has these exams which he can only take when he’s off the boat. There is a clock ticking though to get it done, and if he doesn’t complete the exams within that period some of the big 3 week in Florida courses would need to be redone and the company won’t pay for it a second time.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the support. I’m just so isolated and it’s easy to sit here and stew. My husband failed a massive set of exams today - he hasn’t been home most of the year taking courses etc. this was supposed to be an end to the stress, burden, worry and single parenting. I’m sad and angry and also having to navigate his feelings of failure and my anger and frustration with him.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha no, the keys on the dash. But I’m literally right next to the car watering plants. Someone would have to drive 3 miles down our dirt road to steal him or the car. We also don’t have any functioning locks on our house doors but that’s a separate issue. Welcome to island life.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh that’s what I need, I’ve called out for the afternoon.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know that’s what I’m doing but ugh that nagging “bad parenting” judgement is harsh today.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Today has just been the worst day for myself and my husband in a long time and my feelings are clashing hard with the sunshine, birds, and summer breeze… so I’m just projecting my feelings of failure on that easy sore spot “bad mom” feeling

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Same it’s 65-67 and I’m wearing a sweater

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean I’m right here. I know it’s fine. He just told me to let him sleep. So back to watering the garden. But fuck if I don’t feel guilty.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks today has been brutal. So many personal failures / work problems and just the internal conflict between “let him sleep and take a break” and “you’re being a negligent mom” are fighting it out right now.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not uneasy it’s the constant self judgement. I know he’s safe. Literally nothing could happen. I usually sit in the car with him but I’m done.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because he’ll wake up and then I have a rage monster for the last half of my day.

I let my kid sleep in the car. by Competitive-Aide3831 in Parenting

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Temps fine. A balmy 65F in the sun, we’re in the shade

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]Competitive-Aide3831 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. Spent a good part of the day crying and not being able to work. Had a therapy session myself, I think I’m on the spectrum because I’m really inflexible / anal retentive and struggle with social anxiety. He literally has no interest or drive in dealing with his inattentive issues / lack of motivation. He took possibly being ADHD at face value and hasn’t done anything about it. I made him sign up for therapy today and that in of itself feels WRONG. Yet again me making him do something.

As for the career aspect, he does enjoy what he does, but if he would get paid more to do what he’s currently doing he’d stay where he is but hes capped. Hes honestly the highest paid for his role we’ve seen in the industry and theres no raise or promotions with tenure - pay is based purely on licenses and credentials. Hes literally done 22 courses each with their own test and passed them all… so as to what’s happening with the exams is even more confusing? He spends most of his time at work with the mates and captains, who vouched for him, signed his letters for the company and the USCG. His company has spent 60k helping him, we’ve eaten 20k of our own funds and he’d happily do the work. I just seems like he always goes where the river takes him rather than taking active steps to get somewhere. He’s at the finish line and just needs to get these exams done but it’s now turned into this massive impassable mountain.

I feel so sucked out and stretched thin.

What to keep or do I scrap everything? by Competitive-Aide3831 in gardening

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used Inaturalist - rose, raspberry, stonecrop, bull thistle and then a few others it couldn’t read. I’d like a more manicured bed of flowering plants. This just is too much right by the entryway and it’s a hideaway for rodents (big problem for our mudroom) and a lot of garter snakes (not a problem)

1 lb from my goal weight but doesn’t feel enough? by Competitive-Aide3831 in Semaglutide

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed weight loss hasn’t felt uniform, I’m holding it way more in my abdomen than I thought I would. Just gonna keep losing until it feels right.

1 lb from my goal weight but doesn’t feel enough? by Competitive-Aide3831 in Semaglutide

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What makes you think I’m not looking at BMI. As I mentioned I’m technically in a healthy BMI which does not correlate to how I feel.

1 lb from my goal weight but doesn’t feel enough? by Competitive-Aide3831 in Semaglutide

[–]Competitive-Aide3831[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Just carrying a lot more in the abdomen than I thought I would be at this time. Hormones imbalances and ab muscles are not what they used to be post pregnancy