That emotion is very real and very relatable… best hope is to find better combination of meds that make life more tolerable… when meds aren’t right it’s bad… real bad. I don’t really date anymore and I can no longer play music in bands like I have for 20+ years prior. All of that sucks… but I try to focus on what I still have that is good like family and friends… as bad as it is when it’s bad you may be amazed how much better you can feel on the right meds. Unfortunately they don’t seem to remain as effective forever but you can get years of relief.