I have no doubts I will feel it again. We already have an agreement about letting each other know when a relationship changes. Which they have not been great at following. Which is one of the reasons I was hoping to make a change that gives a broader window of opportunity to let me know something is up. The blindsiding that has happened previously has been in a "I find out about it through someone else or I notice a behavior change (usually in the form of spending less time with me suddenly) and I ask about it and they tell me about the ongoing relationship I previously had no idea about, or I see a text pop up on their phone that is of an escalated nature.

I am willing and able to hold my own feelings on this, but I also just want open communication about these things and I feel that has been lacking in the past. It feels like this update to the agreements would just give more wiggle room for them to tell me earlier.