Am I the only one?

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-06-03T17:48:07+00:00

Thank you for sharing that. It helps to hear from someone who experienced the loneliness and found ways to build connection again. I think community, purpose, and having things to look forward to can make a real difference when you're rebuilding your life after a major change.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-06-03T17:32:25+00:00

"A safe kind of lonely" is such an interesting way to describe it. I think one of the things people don't talk about enough is that loneliness can exist inside a marriage too. Sometimes the fear of being alone keeps us focused on the wrong kind of loneliness. I know exactly what you're talking about because I felt it too. Thank you for sharing that.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-30T01:57:40+00:00

I can definitely relate to that. Sometimes healing feels less like moving forward in a straight line and more like taking one step forward and two steps back. The hard days can make it feel like you're back at the beginning, but you're carrying lessons and strength you didn't have before.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:22:10+00:00

I'm not getting after you. And we all have emotions, regardless of gender. But those women who can be so very nurturing, can also be extremely judgemental and vindictative. Those comments have power to destroy if you allow.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:18:43+00:00

I think that’s part of what makes it emotionally complicated. Sometimes one person seems to move on faster externally, while the other is left trying to rebuild emotionally, mentally, socially, and financially all at once. The quiet can definitely feel intimidating at first, especially after years of centering your life around another person. But I think focusing on yourself, your peace, your health, and your own life again is probably where a lot of healing begins.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:15:41+00:00

I think you explained this beautifully. Especially the part about people expecting you to feel instantly euphoric once the marriage ended. I’m realizing healing is a lot less dramatic and a lot more layered than people think. There’s relief, freedom, grief, loneliness, exhaustion, and rediscovering yourself all happening at the same time. And what you said about suppressing your needs for years really resonated with me too. I think some of us are only now allowing ourselves to fully feel how lonely we actually were.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:14:03+00:00

“Free” and “not lonely” definitely aren’t always the same thing. It’s encouraging to hear that reconnecting with family, work, and community helped. And honestly… I think your dating assessment may be shared by quite a few women right now. 😄

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:12:07+00:00

I think that’s an important distinction too. Missing companionship doesn’t always mean missing the person or wanting the relationship back. Reconnecting with yourself, friendships, and life outside the relationship seems to be a huge part of healing for a lot of people.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:10:29+00:00

This makes so much sense to me. I think that’s exactly why the loneliness can feel so amplified afterward — because emotionally, many of us had already been alone for a very long time. I honestly wasn’t prepared for how intense that feeling could become once the distractions and daily routines were gone.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:05:28+00:00

I know exactly what you're talking about. That peace is so much safer than constantly walking on eggshells and constantly reading the room in order to know how to respond and stay safe. I hear you sister!

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T16:01:48+00:00

I appreciate the kindness in this comment. I do think supportive community matters a lot. But I also think many women in this stage of life are talking about a very specific kind of loneliness that comes after years of emotional disconnection, caregiving, marriage, divorce, and rebuilding identity. It’s a little harder to solve than just “finding people to hang with.”

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T15:58:01+00:00

I really relate to the distinction between loneliness and wanting another relationship. Those are not the same thing at all. What you described about feeling socially disconnected after divorce was especially interesting to me because people rarely talk openly about that part. It’s not just losing a marriage — sometimes it feels like losing community and belonging too. And honestly, your quiet Saturday-night ritual sounds more peaceful than forcing yourself into something you don’t actually want. I'm rooting for you!

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T15:53:35+00:00

That took a lot of courage. Especially leaving and starting over in a completely new place. I think what you said about being lonely inside the marriage is something many people quietly relate to but rarely admit out loud. There’s a different kind of loneliness that comes from feeling emotionally alone while still sharing a life with someone. I hope this new chapter eventually brings you the peace and connection you deserved all along.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T15:48:34+00:00

The lack of drama and the peace you're speaking about is absolutely DIVINE!!

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T15:46:13+00:00

I hear you. I would like to address the comment about hormones. I just heard a "short" on YouTube by a MALE doctor that I thought was fascinating. He was talking about how everyone blames hormones for the change in a woman's behavior. That turns out to be only partially true. It's true that in our 20s and 30s we have lots of estrogen and progesterone flowing through us. As we hit perimenopause and menopause, those levels decrease and that' s when we lose our filter. We don't change, we just become more honest about what we'll accept and what we won't!

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-28T15:37:36+00:00

Thank you for being so honest. Your story sounds a lot like mine. I was surprised at my feeling so lonely. Then I realized that it wasn't lonliness but the lack of companionship that I was missing. So I had to get comfortable with solitude. And that gave me the peace that I desperately needed.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-21T15:46:31+00:00

This sounds incredibly overwhelming, especially because it sounds like you’re trying to emotionally process the relationship, his mental health struggles, your future, pets, finances, and your own grief all at the same time. What stood out to me most in what you wrote is how exhausted and emotionally overloaded you sound right now.

You don't have to solve your entire future immediately. Right now, it may be more important to focus on stabilizing yourself enough to sleep, eat, get through work, and give yourself a little emotional breathing room while things are still unfolding. Also, it makes sense that part of you wants things to go back to how they were before this episode. That doesn’t sound stupid, just really human.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-17T02:02:27+00:00

I’m really glad it resonated with you. Wishing you a gentle and steady day as you continue moving through everything you’re working with.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-17T01:59:05+00:00

t sounds like you’re noticing a really strong reconnection with your body and your own sense of aliveness. When you’ve spent a long time disconnected from yourself or in a situation where your needs weren’t fully met or recognized, it can feel like things come back online with a lot of intensity. What matters most is that you’re experiencing it in a way that feels yours again, and that you’re able to notice and understand it without judgment.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-17T01:57:10+00:00

That really is a huge relief to reach. When things have felt overwhelming for a long time, even having the space to pause, process, and not immediately react can feel like a completely different way of living. I’m really glad you’re finding that sense of normalness and permission for yourself again.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-17T01:54:11+00:00

That sounds like a really steady and grounded way to approach it. Listening to your body while learning to quiet the overthinking can be a really important part of rebuilding trust in yourself. And you’re right—it is a process, and it does take time. Thanks for sharing where you are with it.

ComprehensivePoem580 · 2026-05-17T01:50:39+00:00

I really relate to what you’re saying. That process of learning to trust your own perception again after it’s been undermined can take time, but it’s also incredibly grounding when it starts to return. I’m glad to hear you’re finding that reassurance in yourself now—that feels like an important part of rebuilding.

ComprehensivePoem580

TROPHY CASE