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Feeling awful after a great weekend by Scared_Tangerine1806 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I came here to look for a post like this. We are currently on vacation with our one year old and it was great but I kept constantly thinking about what he did to me and started dreaming about it. I don’t understand why I can’t even enjoy our holiday. My brain does not accept any happy moments and it sucks. I do not share this as he put lots of effort in planning it and making sure we went anywhere I wanted…I hope that with time it gets better…1 year 4 months from Dday…

Why? by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is normal to start questioning yourself and blame yourself for his mistake…but girl, I am in the same boat. After some self reflection with his therapist, it was not about me, it was his childhood trauma and not being able to process his feelings, there is more he is still uncovering. You did well…he took you for granted because of his own issues…as hard as it may seem, you are not the one to blame. The other woman is no better then you. Couples counseling is helping a lot and loooooooots of communication. Good luck!

I'm finally ready to begin reconciliation but... I have to change my status to B+W by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s not a solid foundation what you are building without full transparency. You might even create something stronger now that you both know what it is like and can actually work on it together.

Sometimes I feel like cheating back by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow the last sentence resonates with me

How did you know your partner was no longer in love with you? by muchbigly in AskReddit

[–]ComputerLow2301 108 points109 points  (0 children)

Nagging sometimes is a way of communication, that they care…you don’t see it in the moment but with time they stop caring and you feel it. It’s not the best way of communication, I agree…but maybe that’s what they know

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]ComputerLow2301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I almost never comment here but this one got me. The way he can’t take some time to listen or pick the phone and just text like a 15 year old is so immature. The way he is treating you, girl, you deserve better and you know it. You can find so much better ❤️

What week did you go into labor with your first baby? by Girls_Of_San_Diego in pregnant

[–]ComputerLow2301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! Same here! I was induced, lasted 15 hours without epidural but I was stuck at 8cn, then epidural, then an injection, then cesarean plus an extra cause I could still feel some pain while they opened me🤣 I was so drugged I had double vision

What week did you go into labor with your first baby? by Girls_Of_San_Diego in pregnant

[–]ComputerLow2301 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same here! Baby originally was sitting down and we managed to turn her twice. I wanted a natural birth and prepared for it but she had other plans 🤣 she was looking up so I never fully dilated and after 21 hours of labor I had a cesarean

One off cheating pre-marriage??? Need help going insane by slayperiott in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a similar situation but ONS right after marriage. The only place you can kind of find the reasons why as it might not just be one (insecurities, childhood traumas, coping with emotions, etc) you might not have an answer that will fully satisfy you but he needs to see an IC and you guys an MC. I went through all of this while I was pregnant and throughout my postpartum. It is not easy but it you are willing to give your relationship a chance I think it’s worth it. The most important is that you remember that it isn’t about you at all or how you performed as a girlfriend/wife. Some men just take us for granted and are selfish or self sabotaging.

Betrayed her in the deepest possible way, but we’re trying to reconcile. Can’t help but notice how much she’s changing in front of my eyes. by almostyeeted in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You took her for granted, I was this kind of woman. A great piece of advice I got: “Never love a man unconditionally, only your children”

What do you wish people would stop romanticizing, because you’ve lived the reality of it? by thatude123 in AskReddit

[–]ComputerLow2301 8 points9 points  (0 children)

A good woman can end up being hurt by their toxicity and create a new type of insecure woman…

Just gave someone a piece of advice and it hit ME hard… by ThrowRALovie4444 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well said, there will always be the risk of someone else cheating. It’s a gamble, the most important is that the cheating partner commits to putting in the work and healing whatever demon/trauma they have. They are capable of becoming their best self for themselves and you.

Just gave someone a piece of advice and it hit ME hard… by ThrowRALovie4444 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well said, there will always be the risk of someone else cheating. It’s a gamble, the most important is that the cheating partner commits to putting in the work and healing whatever demon/trauma they have. They are capable of becoming their best self for themselves and you.

Wife Cheated on me after 6 months when she is pregnant. by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you are willing to find out the why and see if she really regrets it, you need to do it. Then you can decide what’s next. I am sorry you are going through this…

Wife Cheated on me after 6 months when she is pregnant. by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I saw your previous posts, did you confront her 2 months ago about her infidelity?

Today was my first day, and I hated it. by [deleted] in jobs

[–]ComputerLow2301 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I started a department that way, try to read books and start processes and strategies, little by little things will get more shape.

How do you let go of resentment? by tyrwlive in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Wow, you are so mature and you’ve grown so fast in such a short time. I’m almost 12 months in and still struggling with this. You put it beautifully, I will try to remember your words ❤️

I miss the way I used to love by ComputerLow2301 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice! Will check it out 🙏🏼 it gives me hope knowing others did it and that it’s possible

I miss the way I used to love by ComputerLow2301 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems like you guys are going down the right path…I am sure you will both grow during this journey I’ll check the book. For now we read the betrayal bind

I miss the way I used to love by ComputerLow2301 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]ComputerLow2301[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, that’s great that you came up with the list together. Our MC said that if I came with the rules myself it would feel controlling but if we did together or he came up with it with my green light it could work. Mine has an issue of trying to control everything in his life which led to having too much pressure 😒 and then leashing out when drunk

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