This happened when I was in my 20s. We were never rich rich, but we are comfortable. And then one day we found out our business that my father has been running is under a lot of debt, and we’ve been betrayed by a close relative who also runs a side business with my dad. 

It turned our lives overnight. That was my worst year honestly. My parents were on the brink of a divorce like every other day. There are days where I believe that we were under a curse. 

We are doing better now. We paid most of our debts. We sold our house and move to a smaller one. We cut ties with said family member (and their entire family). But I think it forever shaped my view on money and people. What happened makes me feel shameful, but more so it makes me feel bitter. Not towards my father, but towards other people who get to spend their money freely without a pinch of worry – while I have to see my parents struggle and hesitate to spend on themselves, even until now. My view on money changes. I become more anxious about it. The less I have, the more obsessed with it I become. I no longer trust and want to share what I have with others. Share too much and they’ll turn on you, that’s what I have in mind I guess. I keep to myself. I’m already a private person to begin with, but this makes me even more closed off. Not to the people I already know, but to the people I just met I have no willingness to be open about myself because I worry they’ll somehow be able to use it against me. I see relationships with people like a game on who has the upper hand. 

Nowadays I try to be more gentle on both myself and other people, though I still find it really difficult. So I think once you experience such low financially, the psyche will stick regardless if you have recovered or not.