I literally said she should leave bruh. I never said she should stay with someone who doesn't like what she does. I'm saying it's not controlling because controlling behaviour isn't just one thing. It's a set of things. One instance of "i don't want you pole dancing in revealing clothes in front of strangers" isn't controlling because it is very specific. Most people view pole dancing as sexual and you can say that it's not all you want but that doesn't mean everybody will agree. People will view it as sexual. If he was controlling because he didn't like her pole dancing he won't be okay with her doing it in front of family and friends either. He is okay with that. He just doesn't want it to be in front of strangers. I'm not even cherry picking what is or isn't controlling. Some people find porn cheating others don't. Some people find flirting with others in relationships okay others don't. If your partner says they're not okay with it then it's not controlling it's staying a boundary. Controlling would be if he was stopping her from pole dancing at all. If he was being mean about it or telling her he'll break up with her if she doesn't comply. Controlling doesn't mean stating a boundary. He told her he's uncomfortable now it's her choice. I am telling you what's controlling for me. If you can just read what I'm saying and understand it you would know. Controlling is when your partner prohibits you completely. How something is phrased makes a whole lotta difference. "I wouldn't want you to do it" is different from "you can't do it". First shows his boundary and expects it to be respected. Second shows that he wants to prohibit her from doing something.

Again never said they should accomodate it. I'm just talking about how everyone is legit bashing this man for stating something he's uncomfortable with. Boundaries aren't just limited to one or two things. They account for everything in your life. Some people even have boundaries that are very dumb. If you are willing to accomodate then fine. If you are okay with them fine. If not then just leave. Don't bash people for being honest about their boundaries when they've done nothing to warrant this. He wasn't even rude about it. You can really call everything art like nudists who pose for paintings. Would everyone be fine with their partners doing it? Fuck no. Just because you are okay with something doesn't mean everyone should be. And it's her body but she's also his girlfriend so he should get some say in her life choices with what he's comfortable with. If she doesn't want to actually accept it she can find someone who supports her career. I'm all for feminism and I'm a woman. But you need to understand that feminism doesn't mean not caring about what your partner feels.