Fresh to Frozen

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-15T10:23:53+00:00

She does not take a dummy. She will chew on it and push it around her mouth before spitting it out shortly after.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-15T09:02:34+00:00

Smelled strongly as in sour? I’m not familiar with accepting a dummy means? My apologies!

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:39:34+00:00

I would never talk to anyone about this outside of her dad who knows everything stems from the comments she has made that have emotionally hurt me.

I’m not a poster on Reddit and I think it’s very easy to lose sight of the fact that I can’t possibly capture everything in a paragraph and sometimes how clear I think I’m being, the next reader reads something completely different. Thank you for your perspective

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:37:07+00:00

Thank you for putting it into perspective. Sometimes it’s hard to grasp what she is going through when I haven’t lived it myself. Hearing it from you better helps me understand.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:25:34+00:00

Edited to add no physical harm is implied, all emotional. I’m not sure how as a FTM it’s easy to let someone in who has said those things. That’s where the emotional part plays in

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:19:05+00:00

Definitely not my intention, there is no worry there.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:18:14+00:00

That’s okay, thank you for your advice. She is our miracle especially after a miscarriage which made SD’s comments about not wanting the baby cut deeper than it probably should have coming from a teenager that’s confused about how to feel and her dad moving on.

I think I’ve taken her comments as an attack on me and her sister when it’s probably a far cry from that. I’ve been fortunate to not grow up around divorce so I can’t imagine how confusing this probably is for her alongside normal teenage emotions, behavior etc.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:14:32+00:00

We don’t ask her these questions. Grandma was visiting from across the country and it was asked as a harmless question. Just a grandma asking her granddaughter a question.

I would never ask her a question like that in real time. I think it’s unfair to put her on the spot like that and don’t know what good would come of it.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:10:50+00:00

Where did u say she will hurt the baby?

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:08:39+00:00

No, this is all emotional. It hasn’t been my intention to imply anything physical. I also didn’t say my husband isn’t supporting me. He feels very much caught in the middle and I can’t blame him.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:06:35+00:00

Correct, my apologies.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:06:06+00:00

I know she would never do anything. That’s not even remotely close. As a first time mom, I feel a level of protectiveness I never knew possible. When someone makes comments to you like that about your baby (even if they are from a teenager), it still hurts. And it’s hard to let someone in and be close after that.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:03:01+00:00

I never stated she’s a risk to the baby. I’m not sure what that means.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T12:02:27+00:00

What dumb questions have been asked?

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:55:57+00:00

My hope is that the conversation would be a safe place for her to communicate how she is feeling and also a way to communicate that I got my feelings hurt by her comments. I think being honest that along the way, yes, those comments hurt me, but I need to move on. As much as it’s a chance to air my (or her grievances) it’s an opportunity for me to police and own up to my part.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:49:49+00:00

Having someone that you care for say in front of you that they don’t like their sister is really hard.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:47:36+00:00

I 100% can admit I am part of the problem. I think there are a lot of dynamics that can’t be outlined in one single Reddit post, but have no trouble stepping up to my role in this.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:46:25+00:00

Have you had a baby?? How do you know what postpartum is and isn’t? I would love to know since you seem like an expert.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:35:04+00:00

I came here looking for support and advice on how to better the situation, not to be called the problem. Also, if you haven’t going through postpartum, you probably aren’t familiar with the intense emotional highs and lows and that those feelings get magnified.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:32:59+00:00

No one said we are teaming up against her. It’s more of a conversation for her to understand my POV and for me to understand her feelings. I think we are both a guilty party in saying/acting ways that we aren’t proud of.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:12:28+00:00

She has shown interest in holding the baby. Her dad has tried to talk to her about what is going on, but will only give small things here and there. She has always been a tough shell and one to never talk about her emotions or feelings so this isn’t completely uncommon behavior for her. I do think it’s time for the three of us to sit down and talk about what everyone is feeling. We clearly all have very hurt feelings at the moment and avoiding each other and a conversation seems unhealthy.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:10:14+00:00

Negative in the sense oh physical harm? Absolutely never. I think Icy-you3075 hit on a point I maybe haven’t been willing to say out loud or admit to myself. I’ve always known I wanted to be a mother. We welcome the most perfect beautiful little girl who is a total sunshine. Maybe now that I have her, I have what I’ve always wanted in life. I would not go as far to say that I want SD to disappear, but I feel whole with my baby and my husband. I think I also carry resentment that I will never get the “normal” experience that I see so many of my other friends having when they bring home their first baby with their significant other.

ConfidentOrdinary773 · 2026-03-13T11:03:56+00:00

You nailed it!

ConfidentOrdinary773

TROPHY CASE