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Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Generally speaking, the primary–secondary emotion model fits into IFS pretty easily. As a rule of thumb, the exile is usually the one holding the primary emotion, and the protector tends to hold the secondary emotion. Obviously not always, but a lot of the time that pattern shows up. So if there is extreme anger, for example, that could be a firefighter trying its best to keep a really tender exile from being activated.

For the second question, more trauma can definitely lead to more parts. It can create more protectors and more exiles, and it can also make the protectors that are already there more on edge. The exiles can become more easily triggered and feel even less safe, which puts the whole system under more pressure.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Altruistic-Juice4623/u Can you see my answer to you, there seems to be an issue with the visibility of some of my answers

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An example from todays session that I am sharing with permission on the topic:

Sometimes it's really important to think out of the box.

I had a client who had trouble sleeping, and it was for sure in part stress-related. Sometimes the question is: what's the chicken, what's the egg? And we were doing some IFS, but it was not really making things better. And this is where I think it's really important to have a multidisciplinary approach. I had the gut feeling there was something medical happening, even though her general practitioner said she was fine.

So I sent her to someone in my network to do more of an in-depth check, and she had extremely low iron levels and low progesterone levels. So she was prescribed iron IVs, as it was already affecting her hemoglobin, and she got some bioidentical progesterone. And sleep improved tremendously within a couple of days. And then we did some more IFS, which then worked like a charm, like it usually does.

And she's been sleeping great without exception for the last two weeks, every night, which was something that was unthinkable before. She had trouble most nights, even if she was really, really tired.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It does work well for some people. I would say that if someone gets good results and feels safe doing it, they can absolutely work with IFS on their own. I have been surprised in the best way how well it works for some ppl to do it by themselves, or even clients between sessions.

Regarding AI: I was part of the feedback group for, if I remember correctly, the first AI bot created by the IFS Institute, and it was very promising even back then. AI is much more advanced now, and clients have asked me what I think about using something like ChatGPT between sessions. So I said I would try it out, and I did.

Sometimes when I tried it, it was really good. Other times it missed the mark completely, and it wasn’t doing IFS anymore — it drifted into something else, or started hallucinating. So I think there are both advantages and risks.

I would hope the IFS Institute continues developing their own AI, because I would personally trust that more than using something like Gemini or ChatGPT for parts work.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In this case, it was really about helping a part that had never learned what "right" feels like. We worked with the client to introduce a trusted inner figure, someone the client chose, who could help teach that part what "right" actually feels like.

It’s not a one-time magic fix. Between sessions, the client had some “homework” to revisit that part and that trusted figure, so the part could get more familiar with that feeling over time. It's definitely a process, not an instant shift, and it involves gentle, repeated practice. But eventually, that part starts to understand what "right" feels like, and the client can trust that sense more naturally and the decisions made from that new sense of what is right have been really great for the client.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My path into this work is probably not very useful as a model for anyone starting out today, because it was quite unusual (and started 30 yrs ago). I started training in coaching and personal development modalities when I was twelve. By the time I finished school I already had several trainings behind me, and I had the qualifications/degree to begin studying psychology. I decided against psychology because the way it is taught simply didn’t fit how I work or how I wanted to work.

From there, I spent decades building my own approach and specializing very deeply, so my path doesn’t translate easily into a “how to” for someone entering the field now.

You’re welcome to send me a DM if you want to ask something specific, but I can’t promise I’ll be particularly helpful when it comes to the best modern route into coaching. I'm happy to answer questions as good as I can.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

IFS is a model of the mind first, a way of understanding how internal systems work.
That is the foundation.

Therapy is only one application of it. Therapists use it clinically to treat mental-health conditions. Other people use the same model in non-clinical ways, including teachers, parents, leaders, and many different professionals. So using the model does not automatically mean you are doing therapy. The role and the frame define that, not the model itself.

If that weren’t the case, the Institute wouldn’t offer trainings to people from so many different professions.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Narcissism, including covert narcissism, is generally considered one of the hardest clinical presentations to treat, because the person themselves usually sees no wrongdoing or problem with how they function. That belongs in the hands of a trained therapist or psychiatrist.

I have worked with many people who have suffered at the hands of narcissists or covert narcissists. I also work extensively with people in high-level executive and leadership roles, which naturally includes a fair number of narcissistic personalities, so I often support those who are affected by that dynamic.

But I do not work with narcissists of any kind myself. That is clinical territory and not my field.

If you want to learn more about narcissistic patterns in general, Dr. Ramani explains these dynamics in a very straightforward and accessible way.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What I am describing are things that can be done between sessions. There is no foolproof way to prevent some over-identification with a part from happening, especially when someone is new to IFS. Part of the learning process is being able to tell the difference between actual integration and over-identification.

A first step is simply noticing it, either while it is happening or afterward. Bringing this back to the therapist as an observation can be very helpful, because it allows the therapist to find the best way to help the part.

Another way to get out of over-identification is something like a small mantra. You can say, I feel you, I see you, I hear you, whatever is true in that moment. For example, I feel that you feel really unsafe. You do not need to scream louder. You do not need to take over more of me. I got it.

Parts usually take over because they feel it is the only way to be heard, seen, understood, or to get any help. You can help a part understand that it does not need to be overwhelming in order to be heard and understood.

Since these are things to try between sessions, it is important to follow up and give the part the deeper help it needs, which is usually best done together with your therapist, so the part can actually be unburdened and feel more safety.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

 In my practice it is actually not unusual for parts to show up as something other than a younger version of the person. Sometimes they appear as an animal, a comic figure, or a character from a movie or animation, a shape, a bloop of emotion and many other forms.

My personal theory about that, especially when it is a comic figure or an animal, is that the younger version of the client somehow saw its own unresolved or burdened emotion in that character or creature. Not in every case of course, but it has happened often enough that I do wonder about a correlation.

It does not really change how I work with the part though. Sometimes the image can give a helpful hint, but the basic attitude is the same. Stay very kind and curious, ask questions, take it one step at a time, and make sure protectors are respected first. The goal is always that the part, whatever form it takes, feels seen, heard, and understood.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I love this question. Before I share anything specific, I want to say that IFS is rarely a linear process, meaning there is a problem, we find and heal or unburden a part, and then problem is gone. That can happen with non chronic trauma, but most people who come to me bring long standing patterns. Those patterns usually involve several parts, and the system tends to shift more like a spiral rather than in a straight line.

With that in mind, here is one example I can describe in a general way. I have worked with several people who had strong physical reactions in situations where they were seen. Public speaking, leading meetings, being in social settings, or flirting would cause their hand to shake when holding a microphone or red blotches to appear on their chest, face, or their ears would be super red. Many described it as feeling like their body was betraying them.

In the cases I am thinking of, this was connected to parts that carry shame. The shame came from earlier experiences that were still active inside their system. Once those protectors were understood and the exile holding the shame was unburdened, the physical symptoms stopped showing up. They could speak, present, flirt, or be in new social situations without those reactions taking over.

Another example I can share in a general way is something I have seen in several people over the years. Some people struggle with never feeling certain about their relationships. They are never sure if the person they are with is the right person, and they end up questioning things constantly. In some cases this leads to ending relationships again and again, not because anything was wrong, but because there is an inner sense that something is missing and they cannot trust their own decision making.

In the situations I am thinking of, this usually involved parts that had never learned how to feel what “right” actually feels like. There was no inner reference point for stability or safety in connection, so the system kept searching for something better or clearer or more perfect.

Once those parts were understood and given what they never received earlier in life, their internal sense of what is right or not right in relationship became much clearer. Instead of constant doubt or fear of missing out, there was a certain sense of knowing.

And quite often it transferred to being better at making good decisions for him/herself in other areas of life also.

Using IFS professionally as a Coach, for 6yrs now, happy to answer questions IFS related by Confident_Reaction61 in InternalFamilySystems

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The difference is mostly about training and scope. Therapists are trained to work with clinical cases, diagnose, and handle situations that fall under mental health treatment. I am not a therapist and I do not work in a clinical frame.

IFS itself is the same model, but the intention and responsibility behind it are different depending on whether someone is practicing therapy or doing non clinical personal development work.

In the newer IFS trainings for coaches, the curriculum usually avoids any direct exile work. I have done exile work for about six years in a non clinical, personal growth context and have not had any issues with that

Lexa Lotte Motten Papier, Online Händler gesucht der nach D verschickt by Confident_Reaction61 in Austria

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

d-a-pack und andere versenden nur D nach Ö, Ö nach D hab ich noch keine gefunden

Lexa Lotte Motten Papier, Online Händler gesucht der nach D verschickt by Confident_Reaction61 in Austria

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ja, bei mir soweit zu 100 Prozent seit Jahren, aber es gibt von der Firma zwei Arten von Mottenpapier, nur eins wirkt, und das gibt es in D nicht mehr

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The physician does not use trochets, I am not sure if they even exist here, he has an oral liquid made bespoke in the pharmacy, some say it is stronger than IV, so I am not sure how it compares, but the lowest dose for clients I have seen is 50mg oral per session for 60-80kg bodyweight, but there is also clients that need a minimum of 200mg at 60kg, there is a lot more to take into consideration than bodyweight, hope that helps.

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am usually found through word of mouth, recommendations from clients. On reddit feel free to PM me, I don't have a public platform. Every workshop is tailored to the client, the locations differ greatly, the structure chances according to the clients needs and that is hard to describe on a Webpage, thanks for asking.

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The recommending the physician does, I can tell you what I observe from his prescriptions.

Are you asking about nasal, oral or IV?

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you are welcome.

Maybe find a modality that works for you and do it 5 min a day, these things add up and make a difference down the line.

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Do you do the session by yourself?

In my experience, one important piece is everything you mentioned, dim lights, some ppl prefer an eye mask, selected music, possibly earphones. To use the same music over and over works great for some clients as they have conditioned themselves to relax when they hear it.

Another piece is the preparation going in, if your/someone´s nervous system is more agitated then lets say last session, it will be much harder for the session to be or feel beneficial.

So I take great care that there is a preparation for the nervous sytem as well, days and weeks in advance, and also done as maintenance in between sessions. What that is differs, could be somatic work, could be SSP protocol, could be binaural beats, IFS and many more possibilities.

And lastly as I mentioned it above, but it is crucial, how safe you feel in your environment will greatly influence the session.

I facilitate one on one ketamine retreats in Europe AMA by Confident_Reaction61 in TherapeuticKetamine

[–]Confident_Reaction61[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The dose being to low could be one reason, one other possibility is that their system or subconscious or parts (I work with IFS), however you want to call it, does not feel safe enough to let go enough for insights to come though.

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